Intimacy question?

Question

Ok, this may sound like an odd question but I'm really curious: Why is it that you be as close, as intimate, as you like with someone emotionally (sharing deep secrets, etc) and it's not considered cheating whereas much less physical intimacy (like a peck on the lips) is cheating? Why is cheating based just on the body and not on the heart??

Answer 1

i think the first part is cheating too !!

Answer 2

I dont think the first part is really cheating, but physical intimacy is more or less considered cheating bcause people can witness the cheating being done! Now what i trying to get as is the first part can be hidden from others. YOu may hide your true feeling but eventually you will slip you and the truth will come out! You cant hide true feelings. The heart is so strong!

Answer 3

If you think about what people get angry over when it comes to cheating, it isn't just about the body - it's about the betrayal of trust, which is an emotional issue. The physical intimacy is seen as a representation of a kind of deep, intimate relatonship that belongs to two people who know each other well and have made a commitment to each other, who have reached that level of not just physical intimacy, but emotional and spiritual intimacy as well. That's why people talk in terms of taking a relationship "to the next level." There's a realization of different levels of physical intimacy as being representative of the depth and importance of the relationship. In other words, a kiss isn't equivalent to sexual intercourse, and on some level, we all realize that.

Besides, you can kiss many people in many different ways for many different reasons -- kissing Grandma on the cheek isn't the same as kissing your boyfriend -- but it would be hard to argue that you were having sex "just to be social."

To have that kind of physical relationship with someone else is essentially saying that the first relationship isn't that deep, or that special - if you can share that same level of intimacy with someone else, how unique is either relationship?

Of course, there can be emotional infidelity -- if, for example, you think about, confide in, long for the company of one person to the extent that you aren't emotionally available for the person you're supposed to be in a committed relationship with, then your heart isn't in that "committed" relationship, and you're cheating.

It's just that the law recognizes physical cheating, which is proveable, and not emotional cheating, which can't be photographed, so we make the mistake of saying one is cheating but the other isn't. If you were to ask the spouse of someone who spends hours flirting with someone else online if they feel their spouse is cheating, I think most would say "yes."

Cheating is about where your heart and head are, as much as your body.

Answer 4

You are wrong..it combines both... if you are committed enough to a person to share your inner most feelings and intimate thoughts, then you are past the point of physical need, that is just a matter of time.
What I am trying to say is that if you have involved yourself with another person outside of your relationship to the point that you have been mentally and emotionally intimate with, you might as well have been physically intimate with them also... you have passed the point of no return. If you are facing dilemma, ask yourself is it worth it? and if it is then why have you stayed in a relationship that isn't satisfying to you? are you being fair to your committed partner?
There are alot of people who think about cheating all the time, but following through with it is much harder in reality.
Just don't do anything you will regret. Peace.

Answer 5

It's not. I am sure many people may see it this way, but the fact is there are many ways to cheat. If you are letting an emotional attachment develop between you and another person that is cheating also.. just as serious and hurtful as physically cheating. If it is involved in your relationship with someone, and you do it with someone else on the side, it's cheating...

Answer 6

Cheating is different for everyone. Some women consider emotional involvement cheating whereas kissing someone might not be, (perhaps this is how you greet all of your friends, or maybe it's cultural). It just depends. When you are in a relationship, it is very important to define cheating in terms of your own personal relationship so as not to offend your mate.

Answer 7

Intimacy meaning varies from relationship to relationship, and within a relationship over time. In some relationships, intimacy is entwined with sex and feelings of closeness may be connected or confused with sexual feelings. In other relationships, intimacy has more to do with shared moments than sexual interactions. In any case, intimacy is linked with feelings of closeness among partners in a relationship.
Intimacy and healthy relationships go hand in hand. Indeed, intimacy is a basic ingredient in any meaningful relationship: the basis of friendship and one of the foundations of love. Without intimacy true friends would not exist.
Many people consider cheating to be any violation of the mutually agreed-upon rules of a relationship, which may or may not include sexual monogamy.

Answer 8

Sharing secrets intimately, does not sound like cheating to me... It is trust and confidence.
Cheating is borne on the pysical contact of a person other than your husband or other than the one you love..
Having sex.. that is.. physical contact and that is cheating..
Sharing emotions, secrets, intimately, is to me purely an act of mutual trust, confidence, respect, love yes could be, but there can never be cheating.

But as you say your heart is involve... then,, I could see that is already becoming an emotional cheating.

Answer 9

good question. The problem is that you women have a low tolerance for your man talking to another woman. I am not allowed to have any friends because if I want to go out with a friend I'm accused of cheating. Can't wait till the kid is 18 and off to college. Then I'm off too.

Answer 10

Cheating is Cheating. Emotional or Physical dont really matter.

Answer 11

Cheating is not just a physical thing. It can involve emotions as well. Emotional cheating can be just as bad, or worse, than physical cheating.