My wife and I are in our 30s , we have been married 8 years - but neither of us cares for the sex between us.
We love each other, go on dates, we are best friends - but we are just not intimate that often.
She probably would be willing to do it more - I just dont have the desire like I should.
I have given her the ok, if she wanted, to find a guy to take care of her sexual needs....as bad as that is. She has started emailing a guy she used to work with, but I'm not sure she is ready to do something like that yet.
My question is -
Do other married couples - go for long periods of time without sex?
Does anyone else have a good marriage that does NOT have much sex going on?
2006-09-06 07:23:13 · 19 answers · asked by John M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
you get stuck in a rut,so try something new with her.Rent a movie and maybe that will help.
2006-09-06 07:26:52 · answer #1 · answered by shepardman1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you are crazy to allow her to have sex with someone else, and she must be stupid to listen. If there is a problem then you need to figure it out as a couple and not take the easy way out and just sleep around.
Sometimes because of a hard day at work, kids school the responsibilities of a home pile up and can stress a person out. But if you have a great relationship and get along fine then the problem is the excitement of sex. You must not be doing anything fun. Try something new, toys, oral, role playing, massage, bath together, etc. you know what I mean. If it got boring neither of you want it, because you all ready know what to expect. try sex in the car, at the park, elevator, movies, make it fun and exciting, don't let some other fool be all up on your girl. That is disrespect you are giving your self and her.
Think about it if you want to save your marriage, if not separate and if the friendship is that good it will continue.
2006-09-06 14:32:04 · answer #2 · answered by latina lover 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have been married for 6 years and most of that time the sex was far and few between. It wasn't until now that things have picked up. What us to be a least every other month is now at least once or more a week. Maybe you need to find out what happened with your desire and hers if need be.
2006-09-06 14:31:13 · answer #3 · answered by sscott12414 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely, yes. We're in our 40's and have been together over 20 years. While I'm the frisky one, who's had to learn to curb those impulses. I love my life partner way too much to cheat , even with the desire being as strong as it is, in me. One of my ways of coping, which has been okayed, is to use the internet for a release valve, so long as those I do it with realize that there will never be any Real contact between us. Beyond that, the relationship I have is wonderful. For me, I simply had to make a conscious choice about what was more important to me, long term - and for me that is how much I'm in love, and how good we are in every other way, together.
2006-09-06 14:31:34 · answer #4 · answered by Namon 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Having an "open marriage" is never a good idea. The primary principle of marriage is monogamy.
Have you guys tried some "marital aids?" Maybe that will spice things up.
I recommend that you two attend counseling. Get to the root of this before it completely destroys the qualities that you two enjoy about each other, not to mention your marriage.
2006-09-06 14:28:30 · answer #5 · answered by Encyclopedia Allie 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
a wife that wants sex and you don't? Get a check up, quit beating off.. If you enjoy your wife and the companionship you ought to make it your business in life to pleasure her.
My wife can go without for a long time, but finding a women that enjoys it, man that'd be like a cake walk. You don't know what you are missing until you lose it. And with what you told her, you WILL lose her.
2006-09-06 14:32:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well maybe your wife is emailing my husband because it seems I'm getting as much as I used to....and I've only been married 2.5 years....Great now I have something to look forward to in 8 years of marriage " my husband telling me to find someone else to have sex with" - men
2006-09-06 14:26:44 · answer #7 · answered by ERICKSMAMA 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well i havent been married 4 so long but there times we dont have sex in a week so i kind of see your problem . maybe b cause you 2 are always together maybe thats a reason . go out to a sex store buy a couple of toys so you can spice up your sex life.
2006-09-06 14:30:17 · answer #8 · answered by ruby r 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
wow i'm not married but i wouldn't want another pleasing my significant other.. u need to start taking some viagra, watch pornos or see a counselor.. ur giving her permission to cheat and u have no idea how ur gonna feel bout it after the dead is done and once it's done u can't go back.. and what if u want her to stop and she gets addicted.. u should choose what u do and say to ur wife carefully
2006-09-06 14:29:53 · answer #9 · answered by Queen D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband and i have been married ten years. We definitely don't have sex as often as we use to. We are both fine with that. We get along great in every other aspect of our relationship.
2006-09-06 14:27:00 · answer #10 · answered by Jen G 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sex and lots of it are a requirement in our marriage. I would miss the intimacy. I can't believe that you are giving your wife the greenlight to cheat. What are you going to do when she leaves you for him?
2006-09-06 14:30:41 · answer #11 · answered by Simply Lovely 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋