Well.. aprox. 2 months ago (or so it seems) my ex girlfriend and i broke up. long story short, it was a firey, painfull, bitter experience. and i admit i'm not really over it... ...the question is... my brother talks to her occasionaly.. and it really makes me uncomfortable. is it wrong for me to request that my brother doesn't talk to her? or is it "socially" acceptable.
2006-09-06 06:39:54 · 26 answers · asked by classy_gui 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
first of all it is not wrong to ask for a request for him not to talk to your ex girlfriend, anyways it is a request so don't assumed that he will do it but at least he knows that you feel uncomfortable that he still talks to her.
2006-09-06 06:44:26 · answer #1 · answered by lovelydheng 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is wrong for couple to split from each other and expect the other family members to interact afterwards. If your ex and family had good relationship and became friends so long as there isnt backstabbing involved from it afterwards. If it only makes you uncomfortable and isnt doing any real harm, why shouldnt she be allowed to talk to them. Maybe she confides in him and he can help patch things up. Don't be so quick to jump the gun. Don't make your problems with her your family's problems, not fair. Let them be neutral and open to both of you. Don't question her or them about the chats, if they think its something you need to know they will say so. Maybe she and brother are or could become interested in each other. Don't get irrational, talk to your brother about it let him know where whats eating you. are you aggrivated that she is talking to him and not you. good luck with your situation. this will only be as hard and you want to make.
2006-09-06 14:04:45 · answer #2 · answered by MrsPTB4Life 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Without knowing his intentions it is difficult to say. . .however, he has information about her that he may not other wise have, since you have had her as a GF. With this knowledge, he is more apt to win her affections simply by sympathizing with her about you and thereby make a move on her even if it is not intentional. . You should confront him in a "concerned " manner that is not sounding as an accusation. SImply tell him your feelings on about this situation and the possibilities that can occur after a girl falls out of a relationship (even a guy. . but we are talking about her)
You are hurt by her, and if your brother is laying out the ground work (intentionally or not) to move in, it would be best to express your concerns to avoid your relationship with him getting destroyed, after all, guys will be guys. Good luck!
2006-09-06 13:53:42 · answer #3 · answered by zambranoray 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly I feel that if you are really uncomfortable having your brother still talking to your ex.... tell your brother how you feel. Ask him if he would mind not talking to her anymore cause your still really hurt and its hurting you even more knowing that they talk. He is family he will understand. Its not gonna help you to get over her if she is still in your life. Asking him to stay away is perfectly understandable.... I would do the same thing.
2006-09-06 13:45:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talks to her how? Like in passing or calls her up to chat? Because some casual contact may be unavoidable. If he has a relationship with her that is bothering you, just tell him that things are still raw between her and you. You can't ask him not to be friends with her, but you can ask not to know about their conversations.
2006-09-06 13:44:04 · answer #5 · answered by every1lovesamixedgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well you have moved on right? If your brother is talking to her and you are no longer with her...what's the problem? If he's trying to hook up with her, most likely he too in due time will learn the same lesson you did. Don't let it bother you. Be the bigger person and get on with your life. Let it go and let them be.
2006-09-06 13:46:30 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends, how long were you going out and do you have kids together?
If you only dated for a bit then there is no real need for him to speak to her.
Are you worried he fancys her and may want to go out with her? You can explain that it upsets you if he talks to her but unfortunately you can't control it.
Just concentrate on having a good time with your friends and looking after yourself well.
2006-09-06 13:43:28 · answer #7 · answered by Bebe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We cannot change others, we can only change ourselves. I can certainly understand how you must feel. Maybe it would be best, to go to him in private and tell him how this makes you feel. Try to work it out with him so that it does not breed internal resentment within you and lead to harming your relationship with him. Pray about it and try not to focus on the past but in moving ahead in your life. Every relationship we have with others, teaches us something about ourselves. It may be best to learn about what this relationship has taught you about yourself and then move on. Best of inner peace and happiness.
2006-09-06 13:44:48 · answer #8 · answered by Shayna 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would be quite wrong to expect your brother to change himself for your pain. However, it is most appropriate to ask him not to share any of that info with you. Kind of like the old saying "what you don't know won't hurt you".
2006-09-06 13:43:54 · answer #9 · answered by tabby_24_2000_2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is wrong for you to think you can tell your brother who to talk to. If it makes you uncomfortable, talk to her and ask her to get lost.
2006-09-06 13:42:31 · answer #10 · answered by barter256 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋