I'm trying to understand, and please only serious answers. If the gay community wants the straight community to be more excepting, we need to know these things. So back to my question. I have read on YA many answers from Butch lesbians that they feel as though they where born in the wrong body. If they are in a romantic relationship with another woman, and decided to have a sex change, I would assume they would still prefer to be with a woman. Would their partner stay after the change? Would that then make the formerly lesbian partner straight?
2006-09-06 02:24:30 · 22 answers · asked by mslorikoch 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
As a transsexual that regularly attends a support group for transpeople, I've seen this situation many times. For many, they stay with their partner. It's an enormous strain on the couple, but many work through it. The typical answer from partners is that they fell in love with the person, not what's between their legs. The partner usually doesn't apply a label to themselves or their relationship after transition since the typical labels don't really fit them. Kudos for you actually knowing that female->male transsexuals actually exist. Most people aren't that knowledgeable.
2006-09-06 02:50:42 · answer #1 · answered by carora13 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Okay, We shall help you understand...sorry for using the royal we...Yes, many Butch Lesbians feel they've been born into the wrong body and if they are in a committed relationship the sex change would be done with the full knowledge of the partner. Yes, then the partners would be staying together but not necessarily because the"butch" partner is now a man. Many lesbians find their partners the same way I found mine...they're attracted to the soul of the person rather than the sex. I met my Best Beloved 26 years ago and fell in love with her almost immediately. It was like this was the person I was waiting for. She just happened to be in the body of a woman. It's not wrong to think that you're in the wrong body. I have a cousin who knows she's a gay man trapped inside an ambiguously straight woman. Sounds funny doesn't it. The human soul is broad and often mis-cast into lines it doesn't necessarily fit into. We all have a choice to make and making a choice about a committed relationship is one of them. Everyone should be able to find love. Love is a very good thing. Blessings on you, my child.
2006-09-06 11:15:47 · answer #2 · answered by Mama Otter 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have some friends that had this exact problem. For a while they did split up because she said that she wanted to be with a woman, not a man. And her partner said that inside she was still the same person, just the outside was changing. I think that it just took her a while to get used to the fact that her partner HAD to be the person on the outside that she was on the inside. In the end they did get back together because they do love each other. Now they are seen as a regular couple. As far as does that make her straight, I would say YES in this relationship but if they ever split up I assume she would go back into the gay world. They have both said that their life to the outside world is a lot easier because people don't look at them strange as they did in a gay relationship and that both families are more accepting of it. They have now been together for 4 years since the change and are still happy.
2006-09-06 09:39:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
As with any such change, there is the potential for problem. If she likes her in part for being a her, then becoming a he changes things--maybe. Some do and some don't and it is hard to tell in advance.
I expect that the lesbian lover would still look at the changed one as her lesbian lover after the principle plumbing gets changed. If that is the case the lesbian lover is still a lesbian while mechanically straight. The partner who changed, however, may change to a greater degree than expected. It is a risk. The eyes will stay the same, perhaps the touch. That may be enough. Maybe.
2006-09-06 15:45:30 · answer #4 · answered by Rabbit 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Having many friends that have transitioned, I can only answer this from watching their experience. And largely the answer is no, they don't stay together.
For one thing, transitioning and taking hormones can wreak havoc on a relationship in general. Additionally, it causes the one that is not transitioning to question their identity, the identity that they may have had for years. Typically, most couples try to stay together at first, but it doesn't work out. If both members in a couple were truly lesbians to begin with.
But as an aside, many FTM's don't date lesbians anyway. They date straight women or other genderqueer/ pre-FTM's. (And no, FTM's don't always choose to continue to be with women. Some are gay identified.)
So, yeah, lesbians typically don't stick around other than in a friend capacity.
2006-09-06 09:40:20 · answer #5 · answered by sloanetheface 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey, being homosexual and being a transsexual are two different things. A homosexual is attracted to people of the same gender, while a transsexual believes he/she was born in the wrong body. Homosexuality deals with your perception of other people, and transsexualism deals with your perception of yourself.
That being said, you can have a butch lesbian who is attracted to women, and believes she's in the wrong body. A gender change would make her a man, but her brain remains the same, so she will still like women. HOWEVER, sometimes the brain is affected by the change, and they can become attracted to men and become... gay.
It all depends on how the sex change affects your mentality. Whether the partner stays with them depends again, on their perception of the new person and anything could happen in cases like these.
2006-09-06 11:00:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
They may feel as though they were born in the wrong body but that is also still the body that God gave them. If they were to have a sex change it would seem as thought their Les partner would no longer want to be with them because in the beginning they were looking for another female and now they have a male.
2006-09-06 09:30:34 · answer #7 · answered by Swan 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
There's a difference between a butch lesbian and trandgendered people who believe they were born as a man but in the wrong body.
2006-09-06 14:38:55 · answer #8 · answered by Adam G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly I wouldn't stay with the Butch or Dyke whichever your prefer. I mean I feel for a chick not a dude. If I wanted a dude than I would be with a dude. Generally I am not into butches. But thats just me i guess. And no the new "He" wouldn't be straight.
2006-09-06 11:01:00 · answer #9 · answered by Leelee 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The person will still be the same person. Depending on the dynamics of the relationship and how much love, understanding and support there is from both side will determine if they stay together or not. The dynamics of the relationship will be very different and it would take lots of adjusting on both sides.
2006-09-06 10:25:27 · answer #10 · answered by Sandy C 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋