Why are so many widowers eager to marry again when widows are much more cautious about committing themselves?

Question

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/arts/main.jhtml;jsessionid=2LR5D5MLDJVBZQFIQMGCFFOAVCBQUIV0?xml=/arts/2006/09/06/ftmarry06.xml

Answer 1

They're only eager to marry widows with money in the bank and property, and pensions, so they can join their assets... I had two widowers chase me who actually spoke about this at the outset! Neither of them got past my front door!

I can assure you from experience, that however good you look... they are not so keen, when you have lost it all, due to that past marriage, and are reliant on a pension, in a rented home!

I speak as someone who gets chased a lot... by all ages, and when I reveal the fact that I have humble abode and income, the older ones disappear faster than the kids!

Young men don't give up without me having to be rude... since think they are onto a 'sugar mummy'... and they can be a pain in the a**e when they get you in their sites... since these days, with them, it's merely a step up the social ladder for a while,
They seem mostly to want and need, a passport to England and what better way than a seemingly secure and settled, wealthy older female? Had that tried on me too by a very dishy looking lad who spotted me at the dentists and actually followed me and wouldn't take no for an answer and followed my car... I got hopping mad and told him in no uncertain terms that he should have been panting after little girls.

I aint remotely flattered... or interested in any of them!

I am both widowed and divorced from two marriages and 'seemingly' youthful for my 61 years... which actually causes me problems...

Of course, it could just be my car and posh dialect, that fools 'em and reals them in;-)

Answer 2

I think there is any restriction in widow or widower marry again. We are all human being. Restriction in religion had been established to live peacefully by all man kind. By nature every man or woman love opposite sex. So when widow or widower able to live with marriage, then there is no problem. It is all individual well and wish. Religion to help human being. Some religious person with old tradition may not like it. world are changing. So I found religion allow it.

Answer 3

yeah I am not sure why. My mom has been a widow for 6 years and all the old guys at church are always asking her out. She was very happy with my father and says that nobody could compare to him so she doesn't bother.

I think some men aren't good at taking care of themselves. If the late wife did alot for them perhaps they are use to that and feel that they can't be alone. You also have to look at the age bracket. My mom grew up in an era that did not give women alot of freedom, and perhaps some women don't want to give that up!

Answer 4

men like to be looked after. women are not sure putting up with a man's bad ways are worth it. to put it briefly.
that was an interseting article,thanks. as i have said on previous questions, i think people should have another partner,once they have completed their grieving. in fact i have given my husband permission not to feel guilty ,if i passed away , as he deserves love at all times. i also belive it is possible to love more then one person in a lifetime, even though the relationship may be different.
i don't think it helps people, when everyone acts surpised that they have moved on 2 or so years after the death of a loved one. in rsa in one of the cultures, the man wears a small square of black fabric ,pinned onto his sleeve when in mourning.he is expected to wear it for a few months after the death of his wife. the wife has to wear full black clothing in public for a year after his death. unbeleivable.

Answer 5

Once a man has been married and then got out of it alive, he is thinking REALLY hard about NOT getting himself back into that same situation again JUST to have a steady piece of @$$. That is all it could be.

Answer 6

good question .... the older a man gets the more choice he has in woman, of his own age and younger ... many younger woman are attracted to older men.
a lot of older women look older than a man of equivalent age (unfair but true)

Answer 7

Men like being taken care of and women think 'shucks, I've done this before...why would I want to get into the routine again?!'

Answer 8

Perhaps because they are used to a woman looking after them!