I don't know what it is. My sister thinks I inherited it from my mum but I don't know. I don't mind it when I get hugs from my friends, but anything else makes me feel really uncomfortable. My friends mum was stroking my head once, and I really wanted to escape.No-one else seems to feel like that. Its not like I've been abused or something, I'm just the opposite of a touchy feely person. What do you think?
2006-09-06 02:16:28 · 20 answers · asked by Steph :-) 3 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
If your a freak, then so am I. I don't really even like to shake hands. I believe in "my personal space" and don't like for anyone to invade that. (well, with the exception of my husband) I hate going places where you are expected to hug people! (ex: funerals, weddings, etc.)
2006-09-06 02:20:49 · answer #1 · answered by candy7 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You're not a freak at all. Okay, you have a psychological thing that prevents you from liking someone's, though not friends' of course, touch. So?
Well, it already helps to know you've never been abused. Now, I'm going to be totally honest and say what I think may be possible...
First, it could be because you're against your emotions (assuming that you are emotional) or that you're against/afraid of emotions and therefore don't like it when people get all touchy-feely -- which is coming from a certain emotion; appreciation, let's say. Not sure if appreciation can be called an emotion, but it is a feeling, so let's just say that too. Anyway, why you may be against/afraid of emotion is another question. Because you think showing emotion shows too much of yourself which you also may not like? Possibly. An expose of self can be very uncomfortable depending on the person's nature, past experiences, etc. Or maybe your emotion may have put you in a bad situation once, thus the fear of them. The want of escaping, just as you described the feeling you had afterwards that stroking. In other words, your dislike of not being touched may not come from an act of the exterior (such as an abuse), but of yourself!
The alternative could be that your perception of people, for whetever reason(s), is that they're "dirty". Maybe a certain article, images, etc. have shown people to be dirty and therefore the simple touch of persons you may be confronted to are seen as dirty.
Finally, again in addition, it could just be your nature. Or from your mother, like your sister thinks. Both, really. Quite a few, as unlikely as it may seem, are like this; strongly disliking peoples' touch... don't worry about it. After all, there are some who have a phobia of sitting or even going to the bathroom! Much harder!
Well, this is all I could come up with... I really gave it thought... yes, now, all you can do is try to seek further and help yourself to "heal". It's not much of a big deal, but I guess it could help to start liking touching. Could. Don't have to! It's very positive already that you've confronted this "fear"/dislike. And tried to figure it out...
Anyway, hope I've helped you and good luck! : )
2006-09-06 11:44:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Everyone has their comfort zones. Yours is simply smaller than other peoples'. I don't really like to be touched, either, but I think it stems from a social anxiety I have. I don't like to initiate conversations with people I don't know well, let alone have them touch me!
It's not a big deal unless it hinders your ability to do things "normally" due to the fear or aniexty that someone will or might touch you. If it comes to that, you may want to see what can be done to minimalize it.
2006-09-06 10:51:45 · answer #3 · answered by Protagonist 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Touch is the most powerful sense.
Imagine what you would do if you could see, hear, taste,smell but not feel? Not a stroke or even pain?
You're not a freak you're just sensitive and selective.
You want to allow specific people to touch you. It's completely normal.
2006-09-06 09:23:49 · answer #4 · answered by Vette 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Nothing is wrong with you. I would only be worried if you felt uncomfortable being touched by a loved one such as your parents or your boyfriend. In fact, I do not even like people standing in my "space" if I am not comfortable with them.
2006-09-12 16:05:53 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
To not like touching only makes one wonder what in your past did you find so repugnant about touch that you continue to be sensitive about it. It may be from your infancy that you found something unpleasant but don't remember. Learning to trust enough to touch can be developed and is worthwhile to investigate and pursue. There can be such comfort and love in appropriate touching.
2006-09-06 09:42:47 · answer #6 · answered by missingora 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have one advice for you; try to get a course in NLP (Neuro-linguistic programming). It will really help you overcoming this problem and the problem in the other question (body language)….search the internet to have some information about this field, and try to get a course in it…you might find a 2 weeks-one month course.
2006-09-06 09:43:32 · answer #7 · answered by zee_muk 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is an actual phobia and there are therapy sessions that can treat it over time. Try looking into these if you're really serious about getting over this fear. There is nothing wrong with you dear, it is a totally normal phobia.
2006-09-06 09:36:33 · answer #8 · answered by the_umbrella 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I do the same thing. The only person that can initiate contact with me without me automatically freezing up is my son. Now if I touch first, I'm okay. I don't know what it is, or what it stems from. Just know that you aren't the only one!
2006-09-06 10:38:21 · answer #9 · answered by CrazyJ 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No. It just means you are a private and consevative person who is not keen on touches and feels. I have a friend who has a phobia on that too. He is still a virgin at 25 ;)
2006-09-06 09:23:48 · answer #10 · answered by Baby_Apocalypse 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋