all these yrs ago. i knw thats what u called true love but dont u get bored and tired with the same person everyday for yrs and yrs or is there just a group of ppl who cant stay with 1 person for long and move on to next. saw a programme on these ppl. what are they called. how do i knw im one of them?
2006-09-06 00:52:53 · 16 answers · asked by allgiggles1984 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Real love never changes, but also never stays very still. Its a paradox.
2006-09-06 00:56:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
been with hubby for 17 years, 14 married. i don't feel bored as we keep changing and are able to adapt to each other.it has not allways been easy,but the most important thing is that we still respect each other and a day doesn't go past without loving each other.
also he can't get bored of me as i am a bit pschizo,so theres a new women every few months.(thats a joke)
i do belive that people can love more then one partner in a life time, so do not sit here smug . if it is not a happy union ,it should be worked on and if unfixable ended. why waste years trying to fix something ,instead of living life to the full.
now take Steve Irwin's wife as an example.they had a great marriage and it definately seemed that he was the love of her life. she seems like a fantastic person too, so she should not have to spend the next 40 years or so on her own . with time she should be able to move on without having to explain herself to anyone.
going off track a bit -sorry
i don't know how old you are, but i am guessing that you are under 30. do not feel bad testing the waters, because the more different men you get to know, the more equipped you will be when you find the right fit. you will know what you can and cannot tolerate in a relationship.
2006-09-06 08:11:13 · answer #2 · answered by saywot? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies.
Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love... because it's happening TO YOU.
People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet." Think about the imagery of that __expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.
Falling is love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience.
But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.
The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.
At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry the right person?" And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment.
Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work, church, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.
But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies within it.
I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):
THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.
SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to "make" it day in and day out. That's why we have the __expression "the labor of love." Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.
Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.
Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable... you can "make" love.
Love in marriage is indeed a "decision"... not just a feeling.
2006-09-06 08:39:38 · answer #3 · answered by yunesa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suppose it stands to reason you should love the other person always.
My longest relationship lasted 4 years and the first two years we were madly in love, then it sort of faded. Maybe we just get so used to the other person that we get bored and want something new to entertain us. Though maybe if we made the effort to keep a relationship alive and not dull and monotonous then love would last.
Who knows? Time will tell.
2006-09-06 08:00:50 · answer #4 · answered by Leiani 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think love changes over time... and it's not bad actually... you just find more and more things to love while other things might no longer intrigue you...
Sex with one and the same person for example can easily become boring... but if your love is about to last, you are in a constant search for new ways to bring pleasure to your love, thus continue the realtionship...
The important thing is, love can lasts if there is change and this mean if people change (and in complementary directions)... thats why it is so difficult...
I don't really think it is necessary to seek for a perfect lifelong love, but if you find the person... lucky you!!!
2006-09-06 08:05:34 · answer #5 · answered by Randy Beaman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think being in love's something different altogether - its huge and it takes over everything and it seems to be the only thing there is. people in love sort of stand out - they're dreamy and happy and a little obsessed.
but that's not really sustainable. too much energy involved. and you have to get back to the other things in life. if you're lucky, and if you're great friends as well as being crazy about each other, then it turns into love. that's when you enjoy the other persons's company and miss him when he's not around and you know you'd be happy spending lots and lots of time with him.
at least that's what i think. it's different, but it's special as well.
2006-09-06 11:04:22 · answer #6 · answered by runtotheangels 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ive been with my fiance 4 years now and we have a child together. The relationship we had when we first got together isnt the same its faded alot but i still love him the same, il never stop loving him. Even after our child we love each other and our son. So the answer would be love fades through time but you still love the person no matter what hun. xxxx
2006-09-10 07:06:02 · answer #7 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been married for 11yrs now got 2 children we've been together for 16 yrs had our ups and downs but always stayed true to each other at first its lust and butterflies etc but you end up respecting and becoming best pals because we concentrated so much on the children we both sort of forgot us our time but were still together and make up for it now
2006-09-06 08:31:27 · answer #8 · answered by sweety 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you are in real love ... it could never end !... even if you both separate for a reason or another , and it seems to be that you hate each other , you will still feel the love deep down ! ... because you'll keep on remembering those days in which you were in love with that person ! ...
love is not controlled by rules .. therefore ... there's no such thing as .." people who love for ever " thing ! ...
its just a matter of .. how much did you love that person , and believe it or not , how much are you in love with your self ! ...
... and when you are in love !... you'll surely feel like you're gonna love that person for ever and ever !
hope you can feel this way someday ! :)
2006-09-06 08:02:24 · answer #9 · answered by confused 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not love in the same way as when you meet...thats as much to do with infatuation as anything else but yes you can still love them many many years on...i also believe its possible to love to women equally...perhaps i should ask a question as to what people think of that.
2006-09-06 07:57:11 · answer #10 · answered by Lone Wolf 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that hard to say cuz me and my girl ben together for 2 m on the 17 and we fell in love with each other at first site and ya it hard to be with the same person but the way i c it it not cheating if both of yall do it that they way i look at it
2006-09-06 07:59:04 · answer #11 · answered by franky 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋