My son in 3 1/2 month old. He used to feed at intervals of 2 1/2 hrs till few days old. My inlaws are here.My mother in law usually takes care of him now. I spend most of my time in other chores. He now cries as soon as is in my lap for feeding.I have to force him to feed.Once he starts feeding , he continues to feed.But I dont understand why he cries before feeding.I have to fight really hard to make him feed. He is usually happy otherwise.
Please suggest.Should I spend more time with him ?
2006-09-05 20:25:47 · 19 answers · asked by Preetee M 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
They say that babies are actuly hungary long before they cry to feed.
I would try and feed him about half in hour before he will want to eat.
With my daughter I feed her when she wakes up and is going to sleep...and also when her brother eats. Other then that I look for little signs. I fix her a bottle. If she doesnt eat it no biggie because it last for 2 hours and I know she will be hungary during those two hours.
2006-09-05 20:32:03 · answer #1 · answered by Natasha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Last Resort Is To Cry
You Should Spend Time With Your Baby Too,
I Know Chores Have To Be Done But They Can Be Done Anytime,
Or Mum In law My Help You With Chores,
But If You Spend A Little More Time With Your Baby You May Notice That He Gives Off Signals Then You Can Tell Before He Cries If He's Hungry,
Your His Mum You Will Be Able To Tell,
No Offence To Mum In law But She's Not Little Ones Mum Will Not Pick Up Signals Like You.
2006-09-06 11:33:14 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
3 1/2 months is young. Why is you mum in law looking after the baby while you do the housework? Why isn't she helping with the house and letting you get rest and look after the baby?? You are probably that tired that the baby is picking up on this - try and get time together when you can just relax and enjoy being with baby rather than fitting it around others.
Maybe she holds the bottle a different way and baby has just become more used to this. It doesn't take much to put them off their way.
Are your in laws there permanently or just visiting? Try asking for more help, even if they could make the meals or go to the shops for you it would help. Is this your first? Things will be difficult enough for you as it will as be so new - don't miss out or stress out trying to be polite to others. The most important people just now are you and baby. Perhaps you could speak to your husband and get him to guide them to help out with other things without it seeming as if it is all coming from you.
It is one thing having help and willing hands to cuddle baby but not to the point that you start to feel stressed during your time.
Also - how hungry is he? I know everyone goes on about age but I had a midwife tell me once that she went on weight. My 3rd started solids far sooner than the 'recommended' time but he needed it and he coped well with it. Ask your local nurse next time you can. Always worth inquiring (and it's an opinion that's not you mother in laws so no pressure to go with it!!)
I hope things settle for you. Enjoy your baby. That's your privilege.
2006-09-05 21:28:45 · answer #3 · answered by wee stoater 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes possibly you need to spend more time with him the first 6 months are the most important time for a baby to bond with its mother they get used to the smell of you. if he has been constantly looked after by someone else he has grown used to their smell and the sound of their voice and sees them as the primary carer. you have the time to change this if you take over his feeds and care. ask your inlaws help with the chores as you fell you are not spending enough time with your baby.tell them you are grateful of thier help but feel you are missing out on the precious time you have with your baby when they are so young.
also maybe he just gets so worked up at feedtimes that if you take a few moments just to soothe him in a quite room no tv noise or other people he may feed more calmly
your baby will benifit if you share his care as he also wont become dependant on just one person but try and take a bigger role (not saying you dont).
i am sure your inlaws are really only trying to help but maybe just a little in the wrong way . you are lucky though to have inlaws willing to help out. and your baby looks like it has a loving family around it so in the long run dont worry to much just try and do a few more of the feeds and i am sure everything else will fall into place. it can take a few months for a baby to get a routine going my son didnt fall into a routine until he was 6months old just bear with it and you will enjoy it dont get to tense or he will sense it
good luck hunny and hope all goes well for you
2006-09-07 02:07:13 · answer #4 · answered by sharrifarri 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you have a choice on how much time you can spend with your baby, my advice would be to take advantage of that, baby's aren't baby's for long. I am wondering if baby is being fed a combination between bottle and breast, if so maybe he is having a hard time with nipple confusion. I also wonder if maybe when you sit to feed you are feeling tense, if so he may be feeling the tension. you could try walking and talking/sing to baby for a few minutes before feeding. I found that all my kids would go through stages with eating sometimes they would want to feed lots and other times not so much, it is possible that he isn't that hungry so he is fighting it, but once there enjoys the closeness. if this persists I would talk to a professional
2006-09-05 21:10:34 · answer #5 · answered by just being 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
O.K. I understand what you are saying, I have a 3 1/2 month old and he is doing the same thing( has nothing to do with grandma) he gets so worked up about his bottle I have to calm him down before I can get him to take it. Its also all of a sudden. The last few days i have been upping his bottle by 2oz. ( or go in a room if you are breast feeding alone/ maybe there is just to much going on to eat for him when everyone is around) It has nothing to do with Grandma she is good for your baby ( just don't take advantage) I also get the bottle ready a little early in anticipation. Good luck don't worry!!
2006-09-06 02:35:16 · answer #6 · answered by mhalvas2b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A baby needs bonding time with the MOTHER....not grandmother. The chores can wait. The time between birth and 1 year is crucial for the child to develope a sense of bonding security with you.....with YOU!.
After that, until 4 -6 years old, the child will need YOUR quality TIME to imprint desirable traits that will carry him through public socialization. This is the time where he developes his strengths and/or weaknesses.
Also make sure to have the pediatrician check him for colic.
2006-09-05 20:36:13 · answer #7 · answered by Anna C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My mother says I did the same when I was a baby. Maybe you should change the food or the milk. Visit the hospital or go to the doctor and he'll tell you what is appropriate for the child. Some children prefer other sorts of creams or milk.
2006-09-05 20:36:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't really know but I feel you need to cuddle him more between meals and try to be relaxed and comfortable for feeding ,he may be picking up on stress from you or he may not be bonding with you.try holding him a little away from you and look at his eyes and talk to him ,smile and talk in a calm happy voice.are your in laws there to stay ? because if not you should take back some care of baby so as not to loose touch.good luck and just love him ,it will be fine.
2006-09-05 20:36:34 · answer #9 · answered by stephanie n 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Id try not to force feed him and if he doesnt want it at that time leave it for a few mins. It may also be he is starting to teeth in which his gums may feels sore. Try some bongela prior to feeding a couple of times to see if this is the problem. If in doubt speak to your health visitor
2006-09-05 20:42:44 · answer #10 · answered by alismudge 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋