We have responsibilities to take care of our elderly parent. When I confront them, they just deny even if they don't make sense or it is obvious. Right now I just ignore, but then they thought I bought what they said.
2006-09-05 14:24:42 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I'm talking about my siblings.
2006-09-05 14:26:02 · update #1
don't tell the family member anything personal. they'll twist it. be quiet and private.
2006-09-05 16:46:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've had that as well.
If you tell someone you can't believe what they say they just keep saying its true and may even get angry at you. You're right. When you let it go they think you bought it. I don't really know what can be done about it because people like that tend to, as you say, be "pathological".
If they're lying about something that has to be done for your parent and if they're not doing something, you may have to just do your best to not leave the responsbilities up to them (unfair to you as that may be).
You could try this: Don't try to get them to tell you the truth (because they won't, as you know). Just calmly say, "I know you didn't do........ I can see that for myself." Then just go about your business and do what has to be done. At least you'll let them know you don't buy why they say. I am convinced if I had thought to do that when I was going through something with that kind of person it might have made them at least tone down some of the blatant lying.
People who lie like that have some kind of serious emotional problem. You may have to just stop counting on them. Also, you may want to talk to any health-care people involved with your parent and see if they can offer any ideas.
2006-09-05 19:05:46 · answer #2 · answered by WhiteLilac1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"A pathological liar is defined as someone who lies incessantly, even in situations where lying is not needed, and often does so without any awareness of their behavior. Pathological lying is often viewed as coping mechanism developed in early childhood and it is often associated with some other mental health disorders", such as such as antisocial, borderline and narcissistic personality disorders. Also i have read that mostly we lie to make ourselves look good/ to impress others/to stop others from judging us negatively and etc. I think in your case your sibling might not want to take care of your elderly parents so they lie, that way your parents think they are busy or whatever, instead of thinking that their children truly don't want to take care of them...offcourse i am guessing....
however, you have to confront them that you know when they lie and you are bothered by it. your sibling probably feel guilty towards you aswell, since it seems that care for your parent the most. maybe they lie to you so you won't get hurt either, not knowing you know they are lying which hurts you even more..
i am confusing myself
good luck.
2006-09-05 14:59:30 · answer #3 · answered by naz n 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh my god, I know what you are going threw and IT SUCKS I have had boyfriends like this and other people around me like this all I can say is. Do what you gotta do and leave or try to ignore this person I know its hard but the more you dwell on it the more stressed out you'll be about it, They are only making themselves look stupid and they don't even know it. Sometimes I think they believe there own lies? ITS CRAZY!!
2006-09-05 14:33:51 · answer #4 · answered by Crystal M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah I got one of those , I divided whatever he told me by two subtracted 49 and about 1 percent of it is true.
Does your mum have a lawyer? Has she left instructions in a living will? Who has she designated as Power of Attorney?
Who is taking care of the parent at the moment?
Depending upon the above answers you may have to have your parent made a ward of the province or state and then have yourself named as a trustee. Especially if you are worried there may be elder abuse going on. Talk to her lawyer, talk to her doctors and express your concern.
2006-09-05 14:48:14 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesnt matter what they think. Take what they say with a grain of salt and just do what you need to. You can only be responsible for your actions. Dont worry about what others do, or should do.
2006-09-05 14:28:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
confront it head on. ask for proof or just work around it or make a sarcastic comment like "yeah whatever like you know." nothing worse than letting them think you bought it.
2006-09-05 14:29:37 · answer #7 · answered by gsschulte 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my son does that...makes ya crazy doesn't it?.....and they believe what they say even if they contradict themselves....he's grown..i just hope that he outgrows it....when he's here in the meantime i'm going to just stare at him and see what he does..it's really hard when you're a mom too...good luck...
2006-09-05 14:31:41 · answer #8 · answered by Happy Summer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋