Anyone been to an AA meeting?

Question

What can I expect?

Answer 1

Hiya.

I'm six years sober in AA, so I'll take a shot at this. ;-)

All AA meetings are different, but they are also all the same on some basic points.

Expect to be greeted at the door with a handshake. People may ask your name. They do this not to embarrass you but to welcome you. You don't have to volunteer any information. "Hi" and your first name is plenty for your first meeting. :-)

The meeting may open with a reading of the Twelve Steps. These are the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous as outlined in the book, "Alcoholics Anonymous". You can read along if you have a book or just listen.

The Steps are not rules but guidelines. You'll learn more after the meeting if you'd like to ask some experienced members.

Depending on the format of the meeting, one member may share their personal experience for fifteen minutes or so. This will be followed by comments from people at the meeting. There are no "requirements" to make comments, but usually you will want to just listen at your first meeting. "Newbies" may and do comment, but it's been my experience that it's better to listen than to talk at first.

Or, you may be attending a discussion meeting. A topic will be chosen, or everyone will take turns reading from an AA book, and then members will take turns sharing their experience. You are allowed to "pass" on reading or commenting -- again, this may be more comfortable for you as a newcomer.

As the meeting draws to a close, a basket will be passed. Donations are optional; usually everyone puts in a dollar if they have it. This is to pay for coffee, cookies, and literature handed out, if any. AA is self supporting; there are no dues or fees -- it's up to the members to contribute if they can and wish to.

The meeting will formally close with the members reciting the Lord's Prayer. Again, this is totally optional -- you do not "have" to say anything. AA is not a religious organization, so participate or not, as you wish.

After the formal closing, people will stick around for coffee and talk. This is informally known as the "meeting after the meeting" and can be interesting and fun. People may ask you questions -- again, they're not trying to be nosy, just to let you know you're welcome. Stay and chat if you like or take off -- again, your option. Generally, though, you will meet some interesting people (and enjoy some good baked goods too, LOL) if you stay for five minutes or so afterwards.

Good luck to you and if you don't like the first meeting you attend, try a different one -- there are as many types of AA meetings as there are alcoholics (and that's a lot!) :-)

Answer 2

In response to headcase up there, you do realize that it takes more than one person to drink the Kool-Aid or to hitch a ride on the coattails of a spaceship, right? And let's not forget that right here in San Francisco, cult leader Jim Jones did a lot of community service work for his community - but that doesn't excuse the bad things that happened with the Jonestown tragedy.

Conversely, AA meetings are designed to promote the cult of AA. You can call it "strange" all you want - well, yeah, AA is indeed strange! But anyone who's been to AA for any length of time understands implicitly that the goal of any meeting is to "carry the message" - in other words, it's about religiously converting the newcomer.

Funny how the term "conspiracy theory" gets bandied about by those fundamentalists who fear dissent. The bottom line is indisputable: AA "suggests" (rather coercively sometimes) that the only cure for alcoholism is a spiritual remedy.

They can spout slogans such as "spiritual, not religious," but let me ask you this: Can you name any other "disease" that requires the aid of a "higher power" in order to get well? If a "spiritual" solution works for alcoholism, then why not cancer?

And can you name any other group that meets at least once a week, uses a "basic text" for spiritual guidance (a book that references the word "God" more than 100 times), encourages dependence on a higher power, daily meditation &/or prayer, passes the basket &/or collection plate, that is NOT "religious?"

What you will find at AA meetings may vary. Some meetings are more overzealous about recruiting than others. You may leave one meeting wondering if that's all there is. You may leave another meeting feeling like you can't get out of there fast enough to escape the clutches of the cult recruiters.

Oh, and don't forget the old witch burning trick: If you go to a meeting and say you're an alcoholic, then you are. If you go to a meeting and say you're NOT an alcoholic, then you're "in denial." So many folks are in a pretty bad spot by the time they arrive at AA, and just want acceptance. This vulnerability leaves many "newcomers" at risk to thought control & witch hunt interrogators.

If someone asks to be your sponsor, run like hell.

Incidentally, I left AA in December 2003 & I am doing better than ever!

Answer 3

First they will open with a prayer...usually the serenity prayer. Then they will read a number of readings from their Big Book and maybe some other readings. A basket will be passed around for donations to help "carry the message". A topic will be chosen by the chairperson or a member.

The actual talking (sharing) part of the meeting varies from meeting to meeting. At some meetings, the chairperson calls on people, some the topic is passed around around, others are speaker meetings with one or two people sharing.

Everyone will introduce themselves as "I'm _____ and I'm an alcoholic" or some very close variation to this. They will tell you that you have a disease caused by "cunning, powerful and baffling" alcohol. They will talk about being insane. They will tell horror stories about the terrible things that drinking made them do. They will tell you that they are sick and that they never get better other than for a day at a time. They are never recovered, just recovering.

What they won't tell you. That their encouragement to attend 90 meetings in 90 days is so that you will get properly indoctrinated to the program. That the program is actually religious...they will say that it is "spiritual". That they will teach you how to be a victim and not accept responsiblility to for your own actions.

They will tell you that it works if you work it but won't tell you that AA works for only about 5% of the people that try it and that you have just as much chance quitting drinking by doing it on your own.

Answer 4

Arrive early so you can get a cup of bad coffee.

First come the readings, about 10 minutes of the same mind-numbing words you'll hear every week, followed by a prayer.

What comes next depends on the type of meeting:

Big Book:
People read a portion of the Big Book aloud, often poorly, you try not to laugh, then some guru (usually defined by length of time in the program) tells you what he thinks it means and everyone agrees.

Topic meeting:
Everyone gets a chance to explain why they are grateful to Alcoholics Anonymous.

Open meeting:
People lie about how awful they were as alcoholics, then lie about how happy, joyous, and free they are now after being saved by Alcoholics Anonymous.

In all three types of meetings, you introduce yourself by giving you name and declaring that you are an alcoholic each time you wish to speak. This reinforces the idea that you really want a drink. You are expected to pepper your talk with the same thought-stopping slogans that everyone else uses and make frequent references to God.

Then the grumpy-looking guy in the corner, the one with the most seniority comments on 1) how you all have it wrong, 2) how most of you are going to die drunk, and/or 3) how much better AA was in the old days.

This followed by another (or the same) prayer, you all shout, "It works if you work it!" then go outside and gossip about whoever wasn't there.

Answer 5

Umm...some strange anti-AA answers here. As someone who has experience in this, I can say that AA is not a cult. I was a bit put off in the early days of my meetings by the Lord's Prayer bit, but like someone pointed out, it is optional. There is no definition of a Higher Power that is fed to anyone, that definition is for you to find on your own. And I would have to disagree with the 5% recovery figure quoted above, especially as a)it is an anonymous program, thus making stats difficult, and b)I checked the site given as a source and it looks like every other screaming crackpot conspiracy site. Just 'cause it is on the web, does not make it true. I say, if you think you might need to go, than you probably should make some step in the direction of recovery, and AA is a good place to start. I have been clean and sober for about 12 years, and I almost never go to meetings anymore, so I could hardly be called a zealot. But it did work. And not just for me.

Answer 6

What can you expect? Bad coffee and bad advice.
I was heavily involved for about 8 years with 12 stepping and my advice is, stay away from AA. If you are court ordered to attend at least go in there aware of what's going on. Start reading here, http://www.orange-papers.org/. If you understand what is really going on you stand a chance of getting out of there OK, without being brainwashed.

Just keep in mind at all times that you are only going because you have to. They will tell you,"You didn't get here by accident", "You're right where you belong", bla bla bla and try to convince you that you are one of them, that you are just like them, never buy into that crap.I don't recommend openly defying them because that could cost you points with the judge who violated your rights and sent you there.Just pass the time and sit in there and daydream about anything other than what they are saying.

They can be pretty convincing so be careful. Don't make any friends there, leave as soon as the meeting is over, don't give or accept any phone numbers.If you just try and see them as Jehovah's Witnesses with syphilis you'll probably do OK.

Answer 7

According to AA research about 5% of the people that go eventually stop end up not drinking for over a year. This is about the same result as the study that found people who quit on their own. AA provides fellowship and can get quite cult-like with all the religious overtones. In New York AA was declared religious and cons can no longer be sentenced/coerced to aa ala Mel Gibson in California. As an EX-member of 21 years my advice is to keep mum and just go as an observer unless you want attention of the type you might get from asking a Jehova's Wittness or Pat Robertson style born-again Xtian about Jesus.

Answer 8

Have been to several ... expect no pressure, open honest discussion from whomever's willing to share that night ... Anonymity is a central value of AA so there's never any pressure to participate but only to respect the privacy and integrity of the others.

One note: while AA is not attached to any religion or sect, there is a religious undertone (surrender to a higher power, etc.). If you're uncomfortable with that, I'd recommend a different organization.

Regardless, check out the AA site before going and, in particular, the Big Book (the basis for AA's principles), which you can read online.

Good luck.

Answer 9

What for? I email some of the stuff I get from OP, ant anti-AA site to people I still associate with IN THE ROOMS & i GET ENOUGH OF WHAT i NEED TO CONVINCE ME THAT A MEETING is the last place I would want to be. And I alaso have to remember this for me.
Meetings depresse the hell out of me after 14 years and tyhe last time I was at one, I listened to the same old retoricle BS & lies from the same people I intesionally took yhieer inventory when I was in there. Because, Down South here, if you don't get, Jesus, in your life, you won't be sober too long according to most of these oldtimers.

Answer 10

bypass with and open recommendations, and be arranged to be truthful as many of the folk you will meet have had comparable issues they have cope with and could understand, not an AA member yet have an particularly stable chum it fairly is a sponsor and runs the interior of reach AA consultation, have watched him bypass from a wreck to a pair one others place self belief in. playstation having study many of the replays, its actual that the AA does not extra healthful everybody and you may might desire to discover a fashion that does, yet you have made the only greatest step with the help of accepting you have some thing to handle. stable good fortune and don't supply up.