Have any of you heard any funny, random, hilarious, crazy, ironic quotes??
2006-09-05 09:03:56 · 17 answers · asked by LB 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
GROW YOUR OWN DOPE....PLANT A MAN!!
2006-09-05 09:10:06 · answer #1 · answered by Miss Terious 3 · 3⤊ 2⤋
If you rest, you rust.
-- Helen Hayes
I enjoy life. I think I'll enjoy death even more.
-- Cat Stevens
You can't expect to hit the jackpot if you don't put a few nickels in the machine.
-- Flip Wilson
The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
-- Andy Rooney
The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.
-- George Carlin (Sometimes a Little Brain Damage Can Help, 1984)
If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.
-- Paul Beatty
Life is like stepping onto a boat which is about to sail out to sea and sink.
-- Shunryu Suzuki Roshi
I always wait for the Times each morning. I look at the obituary column and if I’m not in it, I go to work.
-- A. E. Matthews (quoted in Filmgoer's Book of Quotes, 1973)
In life, it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out.
-- Joey Adams
To solve the human equation, we need to add love, subtract hate, multiply good, and divide between truth and error.
-- Janet Coleman
2006-09-05 09:08:59 · answer #2 · answered by jade 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Here's a couple.
1) U say I run like a girl, if u ran a little faster so could u!
2)I'm blonde, what's UR excuse?
3)EEWWWw! Is THAT ur face or did ur neck throw up?!
4)it looks like u fell out of the ugly tree and got hit with all the brances!
5)I hear voices and they don't like u...
6)Death is lifes way of telling u u've been fired.
2006-09-05 09:11:03 · answer #3 · answered by azsxdfcgvbhjn 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
ooo I have a whole bunch! I'll go find them now...
ok, they're more like away messages and things, but I love them anyway. ^_^
~Riding ponies outside walmart... be back when I run out of quarters!
~Light travels faster than sound. thats why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
~'Tis better to stay silent & appear stupid than to open ur mouth & remove all doubt.
~I have gone to find myself, if I return before I get back, do me a huge favor, and let me run away again.
~We could all take a lesson from crayons: Some are sharp, some are beautiful, some have weird names, all are different colors; but they all have to learn to live in the same box.
The last one is my favorite because it's true. Enjoy!
2006-09-05 09:05:48 · answer #4 · answered by Nikki 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hello, OK, THE former CHAIRMAN OF CHRYSLER,,(LEE, COCA,, i think that was his name,, he said,,
"YOU EITHER LEAD, FOLLOW, OR STEP OUT OF THE WAY."
back when Chrysler corp was having financial problems,, he put Chrysler back on the driver seat, with his MACHO attitude, and by making the "K" car.. big time.. when i heard that and read his
book, I LIKE THAT SLOGAN,, so you either going to be a leader, or a follower, or get out of the way because there's no room. as for me all i do now is drink JAMAICAN RUM ,, AT MY AGE OF 99,, I COULD JUST SIT BACK,, AND ENJOY,, HAVE A GREAT DAY..
2006-09-05 09:12:34 · answer #5 · answered by litehmusicdj 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I never heard any funny quotes but I will make one up!
"You want barito" it's good and it has fresh lettuce on it!"
-Aleksander Jr.
2006-09-05 09:10:03 · answer #6 · answered by April Ann Codon Cruz 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
Oscar Wilde
2006-09-05 09:06:10 · answer #7 · answered by Embliri Trex 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I made this up myself " I couldn't find the key to success so I broke down the door" .
2006-09-05 09:06:39 · answer #8 · answered by The Inquisitive 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Marraige is the only war where u sleep with a enemy..
2006-09-05 09:06:11 · answer #9 · answered by CraZyGuy 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
a baseball quote: "In san Louis, in august, it gets hotter than two rats f***ing in a wool sack"
2006-09-05 09:08:38 · answer #10 · answered by buddy1 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
not sure. but i like this quote: "love is a gift from heaven, why does it hurts like hell?"
2006-09-05 09:05:03 · answer #11 · answered by jv637 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋