We were married for 3 years, divorced for 3 years and now back together. While we were divorced, he spent so much time trying to make things work between us. He got a good job, bought a house and really started to grow up. I have custody of our daughter and we decided to say good-bye to my family and friends and move 7 hours away to live with him and see if we can make it work. I am finding myself extremely unhappy and don't know if I can do this much longer. I guess what I need to know is, how do I tell him that I want to leave him again? He will be devistated!
2006-09-05 05:56:04 · 13 answers · asked by Over there 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The reason why I am so unhappy is because ever since we moved here, he has done nothing to show his excitement or happiness to have us back. We both work full time, he plays softball twice a week, goes fishing on the weekends. I feel like I am such a low priority and when I try talking to him about it, he tells me he's happy, but still needs his own space. I am not against it at all, but I think right now, we are trying to make a relationship work and I feel like I am the only one trying. He is still very selfish as that was our big problem when we were married. He is very snappy at our 6 year old daughter. I understand that we have both changed and became more independant. He is used to living on his own now. We have been back together for 3 months, we try to go out and do things alone, we haven't said we love eachother and now he just told me that he doesn't want anymore kids. I am not perfect, but I am trying!
2006-09-05 06:11:52 · update #1
just tell him that you tried.. but you are not happy..
2006-09-05 05:59:12 · answer #1 · answered by Lyne B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The worst thing you could do is to keep yourself in a situation where you are not happy. It will affect you and your child. You are just going to have to tell him the truth, that you wanted it to work, but you just do not see that happening and that you are not happy in the situation. I think that if you tell him the truth now, yes it will hurt, but it will hurt less than if you did not talk about it (just got up and left). Or before you do something like cheat on him, which really hurts bad. Good Luck
2006-09-05 06:02:19 · answer #2 · answered by jam_psb 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly is the best policy. He will survive it. Plus you cannot live your life based on how hurt or devistated he will be. He is an adult. He will find a way to move on. Just explain to him how you feel. You can be gentle about it, but if you really want out, you need to tell him the truth about how you feel. Leading him on and dragging it out will only hurt him and you more.
2006-09-05 06:02:05 · answer #3 · answered by Just Me 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know it is going to hard for you but don't let your guard down. If you are not happy you need to talk to him otherwise both of you will end up down the same road again. Plus if you feel he is growing up he should understand of course he is going to be hurt but he will eventually find someone to make him feel the way you need to feel hang in there.
2006-09-05 06:04:05 · answer #4 · answered by cosmocutie03 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why can't you try to make it work?? If he is trying, then it is only fair that you should try. I feel sorry for him.
Maybe you should try to find out what is making you so unhappy, because it doesn't sound like it is him. What makes you think you will not want him back again? Is that fair to him?
2006-09-05 06:03:23 · answer #5 · answered by Ellyn 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't have came back in the first place. You are putting your kids in a very uncomfortable situation w/ your indecisiveness !! what to do?! well what you did the last time, leave !!
2006-09-05 06:02:39 · answer #6 · answered by lopez76g 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are there out of guilt, you will be unhappy.
Tell him that you love him and care about him but it just isn't working.
Sure, he'll be hurt but you are doing him and your daughter a great disservice by staying because you fear he will be devastated.
2006-09-05 06:01:02 · answer #7 · answered by Angela 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him if he truly loves you he will understand if not then he's selfish for trying to make you stay where ur not happy think of you and your child
2006-09-05 05:59:47 · answer #8 · answered by USAF1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I kinda like agree with Ashli l
tell him if you truly love him you will understand if not then you're selfish for trying to make him stay wher he is not happy. think of you and your child
hmm....
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http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=ApFnkZPzuFxVTtrykmRU5pnsy6IX?qid=20060904195843AANpEIz
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2006-09-05 06:10:38 · answer #9 · answered by DM 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's no "nice" way to break up with someone; you will just have to tell him how you feel. He'll get over it in time.
2006-09-05 06:06:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
then leave, you shouldn't feel obligated to stay if you're unhappy, you tried, it didn't work, time to move on
2006-09-05 06:02:28 · answer #11 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋