I am married, but I like someone else also. I have never expressed my love for her. But I think she has guessed it. I feel that going ahead is possible, but in the long run it might result in spoiling her life as well as my life and the life of my family members. I am staying with my wife and family, but I feel that my wife is more interested in my income than me. I earn well. I don't know what will be the future of my marital relationship. My daughter is 10 yrs old. Therefore I am not taking any drastic steps. I really really don't know what should I be doing further ???? I am sensitive and easy going in nature. Not very tough type. God fearing type. I feel that I deserve a good love life as well as I fear that I will land in soup if I persue with this. I am struggling with this dilemma. Can anyone give me logical choice in this?
2006-09-05 01:14:00 · 12 answers · asked by Roger 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
" I feel that I deserve a good love life"
That is what my mom said too when she left us for another guy. She found all the reasons to leave my Dad.
This is what I say, "I feel I deserve a good mother and my Dad deserves a good wife".
I am sorry about your situation but... for you to grow a feeling for another person it means it was an option to you to get to know that person, I have been into relationships and while I am in a relationship I never had any feelings for other guys because to get to know them more to be interested with them was not an option to me, I'd rather spend time with my boyfriend and get to know him more. I was always loyal.
BTW my mom is living alone now because her relationship with the other guy did not work. Now she wanted to come back but there is no more place for her in our house.
Think about it 1 million times.
If you really feel you do not want to be with your wife anymore, I think it will be unfair for her if she doesn't know that, I suggest you let her know.
:-)
2006-09-05 01:35:58 · answer #1 · answered by dm-dnd 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU HAVE TWO HARD CHOICES THERE IS NO EASY WAY OUT OR ANY LOGICAL CHOICE.
Are you sure about your love for this person do a reality check is it lust or love, do you really want to risk a long term relationship for a person who may make you happy or could be worse.
Maybe stick to the devil you know and don't take the risk you did make your bed and now you have to sleep in it.
OR
Maybe your only choice would be to take a risk and divorce your wife for your own happiness, you are not divorcing your child and will be able to see her often. You will need to financially support your family responsibility but at least you will be happy, thats the main point. Life is very short to be in the wrong relationship and feel very unhappy and miserable. WHATS LIFE IF YOU CAN'T LIVE IT THE WAY YOU WANT.
Hope this helps and good luck with your happiness.
2006-09-05 08:30:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As you have already made your bed, so shall you lie in it!
You already know the consequences to everyone involved, if you go ahead with your new desire.
Instead of making everyone unhappy, how about listening to your conscience, and concentrate your energy towards developing a more successful marriage and family?
I am sure your wife is not interested only in your financial status, unless you have not shown her any other behaviour that attracts her to you. Don't you have other admirable traits that got her hooked on you, married you, gave birth to your child and continue living with you and your family peacefully? Are you saying she doesn't love you but still went ahead for a life with you?
Be frank with yourself and your wife! Don't think you have a choice.
2006-09-05 08:37:03 · answer #3 · answered by G.T. L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try liking your wife over and try to forget about the other lady. Because trust make a stupid move and you'll get in serious trouble. Try taking your wife out or on vacation to forget about the other person.If you think your wife is more interested in your money then talk to her about it. She'll understand if she really loves you. If you still like the other person then i suggest you not do anything cuz you have a daughter and if she finds out I'm sure she will be upset.
2006-09-05 08:30:06 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
put all that mental energy into improving your marriage ... romance your wife, spend some quality time on your children, fantasy's are fine, but they need to stay fantasies ...obviously you and your wife are both taking each other for granted. so, woo your wife and improve your life. start a dialog with your wife to brainstorm for ideas to spice up your marriage. when you both take ownership for finding a way to improve your marriage, it will really turn around and be like a new relationship with an excitement that comes from within you both. get busy and woo your wife!
2006-09-05 08:28:07 · answer #5 · answered by casurfwatcher 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love the one your with.Betrayal is not the answer here.Money buy all means does not buy happiness it sounds like you and your wife need to either sit down face to face and have a heart to heart or maybe see a marriage councillor before you take a trip down divorce lane.
2006-09-05 08:29:34 · answer #6 · answered by cowgirl angie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u love yo wife right? but like the other person. thats the diffrence. u are trying to come up with an excuse by saying she's only interested in your income. get over it! stop dreaming n come back to reality...
2006-09-05 08:18:24 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't start an affair. it WILL NOT end well. my best advice would be to take marriage councelling w/ your wife. but whatever you do, try to get your marriage back on the right track. and by the way, don't ever try to blame your wife for your sins such as do not blame her for "making" you look elsewhere for love. it's your own unexcusible self's fault. try to make it right with your wife and do more things with your family.
2006-09-05 08:18:25 · answer #8 · answered by ragazza.chica.kella 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honesty is key, my friend. Talk to your wife and sort things out.
Don't cheat on her, that's low and even if you don't love her anymore, would you like it if she did that to you? Worse, what would your daughter think of you if you cheated on her mother?
You can't have too much comunication.
2006-09-05 08:19:14 · answer #9 · answered by Woody 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Suck it up and forget about being with another woman. You're married and that's it for you. You're stuck, trapped, till death do you part. Who ever said that life is supposed to make you happy. Slog it out like the rest of us rats and quit your bellyaching
2006-09-05 09:11:43 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋