my adult stepdaughter says my husband made advances towards her, which he is her father....she went thru both sides of our families and told it...I am very humiliated and he says it is not true...what should I do? I need some good advice
2006-09-05 01:04:33 · 14 answers · asked by ondrea b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm with the majority here...there's no way to get proof. And I have seen people so far in denial that even when a pregnancy resulted as the result of the abuse, and DNA evidence was staring the wife in the face, she wouldn't believe it.
Here is an adult woman whose own humiliation is beyond yours. She has no reason to lie, and believe me, will face much ridicule and hatred due to what she's saying. I'm siding with her.
2006-09-05 02:20:34 · answer #1 · answered by Doe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Umm I am not sure what people mean by show you proof. I was molested by my father and I am sorry to tell you the only proof I have is in my heart. First of all it is very hard for someone to believe that a spouse could do that to a child. My mother did not believe me. Have you talked to her about it. Did she go into detail. If she did not it may be because she is traumatized. I to this day can not describe to anyone a single event. It is far too painful and embarrassing for me. You need to question your husband. My father was molested, as I don't know the stats but people that molest have usually been molested. You are in a very difficult situation. She is too if this is indeed true. You can also research the subject on the Internet. You can look for family counselors and support groups. Again I say my mother didn't believe me and to this day I have alot of animosity towards her. I realize you are not her mother but if she is saying this whether true or not she is calling out for help.On one last note if this is true it can be worked through, It is hard and painful, but possible.
2006-09-05 01:29:27 · answer #2 · answered by CiCI 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually, I got some great advice a few days ago. See, I'm very much an understander of evolution, and am trying to study it on the side of Theology (what I'm actually studying), but there's a girl I like who happens to be a devout Creationist. I asked if anyone had any experience with this, and if a relationship was likely to fall apart because of this. Can't think of anywhere else in the world where I could have asked that and gotten the great responses I did. Peace.
2016-03-26 22:47:44 · answer #3 · answered by Nancy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok first off,, proof is great but almost impossible to get,, and asking her for proof is just like telling her you don't believe her.
Ask her to go to therpist and talk it out with them,, they are more equiped to make a decesion on wether or not she is being truthful.
Did she tell you cuz she trusts you? you said adult,, how adult ?? when did she say this happened,, recently?? or like when she was young? Do you have any other children with your husband?
Being someone who was married to a pedophile and didn't know it,, don't just blow her off,, try your best to find the truth. It's a hard thing to face but you might be saving another girl, woman, from horrible abuse.
2006-09-05 01:48:05 · answer #4 · answered by B V 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unless she has a history of being a vindictive liar or has some sort of mental illness that would compel her to make baseless accusations, believe her.
What possible motive could she have for doing this as an adult?
Your humiliation is the least of it, and frankly you have nothing to be ashamed of. You didn't do it and you didn't know about it.
In your heart of hearts, do you think he could have done it?
2006-09-05 01:39:26 · answer #5 · answered by BoomChikkaBoom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should believe every word that she says because she has no reason to lie about anything like that. There is no need for you to be humiliated because you had no clue that this was going on. Your best bet is to get out of the marriage.
2006-09-05 01:22:07 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to find out the truth ASAP. This could rip a family apart so fast, and even if it is a lie, you need to find out why she is doing this, why she wants to start havoc amongst the family. I don't know all of the situation but it sounds like she wants something, maybe attention. My prayers are with you!
2006-09-05 01:44:15 · answer #7 · answered by Dre 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that if this is indeed true, SHE needs to show proof, in the day of cameras and video camcorders, i'm sure with a little thought she could set something up so that if it really does happen, she can catch it on tape.
2006-09-05 01:16:11 · answer #8 · answered by jelli_bean_36 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I might be one of my ex ladies mom tried to make me hit she told me my ex lady screwed her boyfriend so I guess she was trying to get back at her. Now I think about it I wish I would have messed with her mom because she had money lol.
2006-09-05 01:26:32 · answer #9 · answered by southernbound 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need proof ,it may be true but she could also be saying this because she wants you and him to break up..does she like you ..do you think this is something your husband would do ..think about it really hard and get some proof..sorry about what you are going through....
2006-09-05 01:13:34 · answer #10 · answered by JENNIFER D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋