and I decided to send her a lovely letter to help her out with her loneliness, until I could get to visit her. I told her about the recent happenings with my neighbours and just about life in general. The thing is when I rang her soon after, she told me that 'my letter for a 23 year old is very boring'. I felt hurt, and didn't know how to answer that. I thought I just did the decent thing by writing to her in a new town. How do you think I should have responded and does anyone might know why she said this?
2006-09-04 22:27:30 · 20 answers · asked by The way I are 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
She does not sound like a good friend but a rather inconsiderate person. If any friend of mine wrote me I would be happy that they cared and I would never cut them up, how ungrateful!
I am military and I go through losing my friends all the time due to moving, I have never had a friend act like that nor would I. I guess I would nicely tell her she is ungrateful and say goodbye and hang up right away not allowing her lame excuses. Then I would never look back and make friends with grateful people.
2006-09-04 22:41:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your question show that some thing more was between you two.. Look at sentence " 90 miles away from me"
Now there could be many possibilities as to why she did that. One of them I guess could be following.
She had some expectation from you when you both were in the same city. You should have been more pro-active. You might have sensed that but since it was not revealed upon you, you never did anything to answer her expectations. You being a sincere and nice guy remained nice. Oh dear, girls never speak what they have in their mind. They express them in other manners. You being too shy never acted upon them.
Now she is far from you, and possibly she has accepted that you could not and never do what she expected from you. Now she is more expressive. Friend what a duffer is you?
Now you have seen her reply… she was bored with you and not your letter, from your too niceness, girls need a man with guts. You lacked them. Friend except the situation. You missed her forever. She wants a more expressive man, not like you are presently.
Now what will you do? It is up to you. What kind of person are you.. taking suggestion on such matters.
Remove procrastination in such matters. Do it or Leave it. Decide for once… or become a Yogi.. a Sanyasin.
Regards,
2006-09-05 01:52:14 · answer #2 · answered by Deve 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is really hurtful , I'm sorry for that, it can be tough when people you think you can trust are so inconsiderate and careless with your feelings. Do you kow whether she is happy with her move- sometimes being really unhappy can cause someone to be unkind to the people they love, what were the reasons for her move? Perhaps that'll give you a clue as to why she behaved the way she did. If she feels that she's moving on to bigger and better things maybe she feels she has to leave her old life behind to embrace her new. You have to decide what you want to do know, you could ignore her comment and carry on as normal, speak to her at a time when you are feeling calm and explain how hurtful she was- she might be repentent, or you could write her a note and explain that what she did was hurtful, but that you still would like to be her friend and suggest that she contacts you when she feels able to, or you could just leave it, it depends on the value of the friendship. Good luck, I hope it works out for you.
2006-09-04 22:40:02 · answer #3 · answered by emily_jane2379 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess that your heart was in the right place, but she just wasnt ready to read about your neighbours etc.
I would be inclined to ring her 1st and find out what is going on in her life and then reflect that in any future letters.
in reality, the art of letter writing is dying out, due to PC's and emails, and maybe she was just not used to receiving personal mail like that.
Perhaps a card / postcard may help
2006-09-04 23:08:24 · answer #4 · answered by kt_staniford 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sounds like she's angry with you for some reason and if you want to stay friends you should ask her about this. Tell her you feel hurt and that you wrote to her because you care. If she's a true friend you'll be able to sort this out together - if not you should just move on.
2006-09-04 22:48:05 · answer #5 · answered by JR 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you are actually boring?
That might be why your friend moved away. If you haven't seen a friend for some time and all you have to tell her about is gossip concerning neighbours she no loinger lives beside, that strikes me as boring.
Sorry to break it to you like this.
2006-09-04 22:32:40 · answer #6 · answered by le_coupe 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She doesn't sound very nice or maybe she was just having a bad day...I would love to receive a letter like that. You sound like a great friend and if she doesn't apprechiate you she doesn't deserve you....I am 24 and I don't think you are boring !!! xx
2006-09-04 22:37:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would write another letter and say:
I didn't like your comment about my letter.
When you decide to be your old self again let me know.
Until then I am not sure if I want to speak to a person who has become rude to me.
Jerry
2006-09-04 23:28:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
she was trying to make fun maybe, cuz when you're far away you start feeling like there is a wall building between you and your friends (ask me .. personal exp.) so you sometimes say stupid thinks which may look like they are funny but they are not. Don't worry its not that easy especially if you're best friends.
2006-09-04 22:36:27 · answer #9 · answered by Hunter_boy* 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it was very sweet of you to write to her, and very rude of her to react the way she did. My response to her would have been something like this...
"I am sorry if my life is boring to you, apparently you are not interested in sharing it".
You were being thoughtful and it apparently was not appreciated. Move on, she has.
2006-09-04 22:54:35 · answer #10 · answered by PariahMaterial 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋