i've been married almost 2yrs now and it's been hell ever since.me and my hubby used to(and still does)fight alot.we're working on fixing our marriage but the things he has said and did still bother's me.my hubby recently said to me he wants kids,but i don't wanna bring a baby into a marriage like this and i don't wanna hurt him by saying i don't want to have your baby either,how do i tell him without feeling guilty for not wanting a baby and loosing my marriage.
2006-09-04 19:35:51 · 3 answers · asked by Meow4Moe 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Two years of Hell and still fighting? Now he wants to have a child? That would be the worst possible thing you both could do at this point. He sounds selfish like he's using a baby like a tool. It's going to fix something. It's going to "fix" the marriage. Well, he better wake up to the fact that a baby is not a piece of hardware. You need to quit the guilt trip on yourself for knowing, for having the smarts, that having a child is unrealistic right now. Too much tension and stress going on. Too unstable now.
Advice "for the lost"? Take a break from each other. You need to get away for awhile. By yourself, someplace nice, so you can get a breath of fresh air. To see where your life is going. Sort out issues. Get a grip on those things that are still bothering you. Get some peace. A hot shower and a good nights sleep. Cry a little. Or a lot. For yourself. Because you deserve it.
Do you have any girlfriends or female relatives? (no males)
I never could understand why a woman would sell herself short to protect a fragile male ego from being hurt. It's not that you don't want to have a child with him. It's just that now is not the time. It's not that you don't love him either. Just things getting in the way of that love. 2 years is too long to be so unhappy.
2006-09-05 01:43:59 · answer #1 · answered by quantumview 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok, well, my friend just had her dad walk out on her family, so yeah. definately don't have the kid. it'll hurt the whole damn family. anyways, just make it clear that u want to have a baby with him, u just want to make sure that the marraige (don't make it sound like it's all his fault) is secure enough for three. trust me. kids cause arguments.
2006-09-05 02:42:21 · answer #2 · answered by poor_mans_hero 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take poor mans advice. He's your hero on this.
2006-09-05 02:52:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋