I have been with my love for 4 yearsand we were set to be married in 6 months..she and I have both been going through a hard time but not anything that resulted from the other. We hadn't seen each other in awhile and spent 2 amazing days together. She had said that there was something she wanted to talk about but when we got together she "couldn't remember what it was". We made love... or so I thought... three times before she left for her grandparents. Less than 24 hours after she left she calls me to tell me that she isn't happy and hasn't been with me for months and calls not just the wedding but the relationship off. She never EVER told me that she wasn't happy with me until now. I loved her with everything I was and am but she doesn't seem to feel the way I thought she felt for me. We are supposed to get together soon to "work it out" but should I even put my heart on the line since it seems like she has no intentions of trying? She says she loves me but isn't in love with me.
2006-09-04 15:27:47 · 11 answers · asked by Zac L 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
There is nothing more frustrating and sad than one who is in love with someone who does not return the affection. In your place -- and I have been there---I would not see her, nor speak to her. You need to heal up, and find someone else, and the sooner you get on with your life, the better. Painful? oh sure. ...pain of the worst kind.... But you can't make someone want to marry you. And there is no way you could make her happy, and in a marriage you would just be miserable trying to do so. 4 years is long enough. Will she pester you and bother you, and ask to be taken back??? Oh yes. And you will be foolish to do so......
2006-09-04 15:35:28 · answer #1 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say she is having 2 thoughts as to how she feels about you. I know its hard but at least she let you know before you got married. Maybe you should just hold off on the getting married idea. Wait and see what she has to say before you jump to any conclusions. By the way if your still living at home how old are you? If your going to get married these days you need to both have a job and a home of your own before you even consider the thought of getting married.
2006-09-04 22:43:02 · answer #2 · answered by misty eyes 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Been there done that Got the crap kicked out of me. Sit down this is a hard one to swallow. She's involved with somebody else. That love you made for 3 days was sympathy sex. Hey at least you got that. Believe me please the absolute WORST thing you can do is see her again. Make an excuse if She calls you, but heed my warning and save your heart from something much worse that suspicious behavior. B/c when you do meet this time more than likely she's going to drop the ball and it land right on your heart. Hell you didn't want to eat for the next couple weeks anyway did ya?
2006-09-04 22:39:05 · answer #3 · answered by lifhapnz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has moved past the lovers love and into friendship love. Let it go, be nice, let her know how you feel, but you only want her to be happy. You will be hurt but to hate her for saving you from a bad marriage is not the way to go.
2006-09-04 22:32:36 · answer #4 · answered by Pantherempress 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry to tell you, but your fiance is very afraid of commitment. I have been in the same place that you are right now. Let her go, mourn your loss, and try to find peace in your heart. If you take her back, it will only be more the same.
2006-09-04 22:32:02 · answer #5 · answered by littleflower_57 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Firt and foremost you need to try and find out if there is someone else involved..........if there is then you need to be a gentlemen and try and move on. And that's not hard to do. Love is the most mysterious feeling in the world and sometimes just when we think we have found it.........................think again.
2006-09-04 22:36:52 · answer #6 · answered by rlc120168 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, that 's tough!! Um mm, I'd be careful with her, I think it does sound like she moving on. You better hold back a little bit, so you don't have your heart trampled on. Good Luck .
2006-09-04 22:32:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have doubts....that's not a good way to start a marriage, or a relationship for that matter. Be friends, but try to not get back together w/her.
2006-09-04 22:28:30 · answer #8 · answered by paoakalani 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would find out what she has to say. Be prepared for what she is about to say. If she isn't in love with you, the relationsip isn't going to go anywhere.
2006-09-04 22:30:24 · answer #9 · answered by Nick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man where are you - you should know - This is American Way.
2006-09-04 22:32:24 · answer #10 · answered by Toto 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋