My sister was visiting with her family from out of town. They were staying in a hotel but spent some time in my home. They have a son who is 20 years of age who has been known to steal money from family that we know of and other little items (jewelery...etc...ipod speakers) On one of his visits he was spotted a couple of times by a couple of my children and my cleaning lady going through my husbands drawers and on my sons desk while my son was sleeping. I did not want to tell my sister about her son while she was here visiting me. My sister presently has alot of stuff on her plate right now (physical and mental with her husband) and our mother being a demanding person living only 10 minutes by car away from her. Now that the visit is over everyone went back home, I feel I should tell her. What should I do? How do I tell her without her becoming defensive and angry?
2006-09-04 13:35:36 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
You are probably not going to accomplish anything by telling your Sister anything as She probably knows what is going on and has been unable to stop it. You or someone in the family should have confronted the son when He was seen going through the drawers. He must know that sort of conduct will not be tolerated in your household. If nothing was taken it would not be much of a point to your Sister I am thinking. But the son must know that type of conduct will lead down the road to prison or worse.
I believe instead of calling your Sister I would call the Son and tell him what you know and He is never welcome again if he does not apologize and promise to never do it again. He may take it as a lesson learned and never mention it to his Mother or cry to her about your confrontation. Either way your point will be made.
2006-09-04 13:50:54 · answer #1 · answered by RoeB 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not yet qualified to make any kind of psychiatric judgement but to me it sounds like this individual has a problem with stealing. Most people who steal from family and friends are either stealing to support a drug habit or have a serious problem with kleptomania, the overwhelming compulsion to steal. Keeping this hidden will only allow this kind of behavior to continue. If your nephew is a kleptomaniac then an AA-style intervention may be the best route to take. Let him know that even though he kepts doing wrong by you that you as his family still love him.
2006-09-04 13:46:41 · answer #2 · answered by This guy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have no choice other that to confide in your sister . The answer is most likely drugs. It is usually the answer when there is no other. Her son must be confronted next and forbidden from your home. This is not for healing , but protection. Do this with love toward your sister. Don't be angry no matter what you do. Drug dependency is a disease and should be considered as such
2006-09-04 13:50:17 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont know you but it might help to talk to your newphew not your sister, you cauld have a talk to him then your sister.. your newphew is a grown adult and has a stealing issue which strongly needs to be dealt with. invite him over and have a chat. let him know what happened at your house. ask him if he ever needs somthing or help with anything to ask you and your family. the more you make it a negative problem it will effect you, your familiy and extended family and how you look at him. you will find it hard to forgive and forget. the more you talk the better it is for your nephew and yourself. make sure you have a calm voice. try not to yell. it can provoke an argument.
2006-09-04 13:51:42 · answer #4 · answered by Simone L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do need to tell her. Tell exactly what you saw him do and let your sister know that you don't blame her, but you're telling her because your nephew needs professional help before this really gets out of hand. In the meantime, I wouldn't invite this nephew over anymore even if it means resentment from your sister. He has a serious problem and you need to protect your own household by keeping him out.
2006-09-04 13:44:18 · answer #5 · answered by M N 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She wont believe it or just turn her head. A moms love for her children is strong and she will never think her child will do something bad , such as steal. Lots of mom on her will disagree but it is the truth. Now if you will tell the dad, he will do something about it.
Another fact; The only reason why these female's feel that you should do something is because it is not their child. Sorry Ladies, but it is the truth.
2006-09-04 13:51:35 · answer #6 · answered by Grandpa Shark 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He is a grown man he should have been confronted directly. Your sister does not need to be bothered with this. Do not allow him in your home. Advise him if he is caught stealing anything anywhere he will be reported to the authorities...and follow up.
2006-09-04 13:44:43 · answer #7 · answered by ValleyViolet 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should tell her, i`m sure it won`t be a surprise to her just another embarrassment..next time he comes over, had him ten bucks and tell him in front of everyone that he now has no reason to search your home.sometimes shame works
2006-09-04 13:41:32 · answer #8 · answered by who cares 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Deal with it yourself...beat him senseless with a nice piece of hickory wood.
2006-09-04 13:40:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stand firm and say that she is more than welcome in your house but her son is not. Then tell her what you found her son doing.
2006-09-04 13:40:22 · answer #10 · answered by Kenneth G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋