Stay at home Mom?

Question

I am not a Mother yet but my boyfriend and I have talked about the what if's for the future.
My Mother was a stay at home Mom and my Father did just fine taking care of all of us. (4)
I'm perfectly willing to have a job, only one that lets me work from home or gives me a lot of free time.
I would like my husband to have the same.
I am not interested in daycare.
My boyfriend doesn't want a stay at home wife. He thinks it's old fashioned.
Guys, how do you feel about this?
Girls, what about you?
Do you have a stay at home wife?
would you be a stay at home wife?
Why/why not?

BTW - my boyfriend says he would be PERFECTLY willing to be a stay at home DAD.

Answer 1

I am a working mom and my boyfriend has no preference to me working or not. We are to get married in a year. In some instances I would like to stay home and be with my kids. My job brings us health benefits for the family so my work is important.
You and your boyfriend need to work at this and decide. There are alot of part time jobs where you can work part of the day. A mom needs to get out and be social too. Otherwise you are stuck only knowing cartoons and soap operas.
With the economy today both partners need to work for the income and that depends on what the both of you decide you want in your life.

I can understand it is very hard to leave your 6 week old at day care. I did it once and it breaks your heart every time.

I know my answer is back and forth but it truly depends on the individuals and what their plans in life are. Good Luck!

Answer 2

I was a stay home for 14 years(i have a14year old,10 year old and a 3and a half year old).I now work only 8 hours a week as a counsellor.When l am at work my husband stays home to look after our 3 and a half year old.I don't think it's old fashioned at all to stay home and look after the children.They are not small for long.If you are in a situation where you have no choice to work (become a singe parent,or your partner dies)I can totally understand that a person needs to work,but if there are 2 people in a relationship and they have children,one should stay home and look after the children until they are old enough for school.It's a parents job to raise the children,to teach them morals,walk,talk,respect,compassion,not a full time baby sitter.

Answer 3

It may be old fashioned, but that does not mean it is necessarily good nor bad.

The prime concern I would have is being able to afford whatever lifestyle you want. It is difficult to get by on a single family income, but far from impossible. If you staying at home is something on which you are not willing to compromise (which is fine), then you will need to find a man that can earn a sufficient income to maintain your desired lifestyle.

As you said, you might need to look into finding part-time work. Just be realistic about what you THINK you can manage and what you actually WILL BE ABLE to manage.

Answer 4

Oh I've got a lot of opinions on this subject! I feel that the best thing I ever did is stay home with my daughter until she was 10 mos. And even after that, we had only a few hours a day where a family member cared for her. I am a stong believer in staying at home with your children...only if you make a major effort on keeping a balance in your life by still taking care and doing things for YOU.....don't ever feel selfish about that. Motherhood is a 24/7/365 job....and you need to remain healthy and happy in order for your children to be healthy and happy. And let's just not go there with how I feel about daycare facilities.....only you and you only will know the true well being of your chilld.....when you care for them yourself.

Answer 5

If your boyfriend doesn't want a stay at home wife he really doesn't want kids. Look elsewhere and drop him before you have children and realize you made a big mistake, because it will be too late then making your children suffer.

The best for married people are if children the woman stays home to raise the children this is a very important part of the upbringing of children. When they are of school age you can go to work during their school hours and be home to send them off and see them in.

Visit Dr. Laura's web site http://www.drlaura.com/main.

even if you don't agree with some of her opinions (which I do) you will get a lot of information about your question of staying home and the selfishness of your boyfriend.

Do it now and don't delay. It will save you so much grief

Answer 6

If you have computer skills and can work at home I say go for it. I think now a days it is hard to raise a family with only one income. It is even hard to get the necessities when you have only one income. If you do not work at all most likely the man will take advantage of that in one way or another. You want to make sure you make enough just in case the marriage does not work out.

Answer 7

I was both. I'd say when the kids are not school aged, they really need their mother at home at least part-time. After they go to school, you're a free woman again! You'll find the best of both worlds would be to work part-time or at home as you suggested. If you only "stay home" with the kids all of your married life, you'll end up feeling resentful. So go for both!

Answer 8

my husband and I prefer that one parent stays at home. We dont want to pay for someone else to raise our kids. I have the job and he stays at home. The only debt we have is our car payment and monthly expenses. We dont have a $500 daycare bill and that is conservative estimate, plus our kids get the attention from a parent and the guidance WE want, not someone elses values. My husband home schools 2 out of our 4 kids and loves it! Maybe your b/f will want to stay at home. You can go to college, get a good job with benefits and HE can stay at home, cook, clean, run a household. By the way...my husband also packs my lunch and does my laundry......more and more dads are doing it now days...look into it. God Bless

Answer 9

I don't think it's right that you your boyfriend would'nt let u be a stay at home mom but he's fine with himself doing it.I think when my husband and i have kids i would like to stay home for the first year or two or until they start school and then start working again,but get out in time to pick them up for school and spend time with them.

Answer 10

you realize, I choose I had somebody such as you sticking up for me. some days i will slack a splash reason I even have worked so annoying the different days I might desire to offer myself that wreck. I actually have a three 365 days previous and a pair of 365 days previous with yet another on the way so i'm getting exhausted easily. My husband complains that i might desire to be cleansing whilst the infants nap rather of drowsing with them. yet you realize what. the domicile isn't perfect, yet dishes are performed, I actually have a plan for dinner, the laundry is carried out, ect. My house is clean and clean upd and that i've got faith that even nevertheless i understand he is going to a annoying job for 10 hrs an afternoon I actually have a annoying job right here to. Yeah i'm getting extra breaks to take a seat on the computing device for awhile. yet I save my butt moving on different stuff many of the day. I choose my sixteen 365 days previous brother became as clever as you. He wont p.c.. his own laundry off the floor and the two one among my mothers and fathers nonetheless artwork. you would be a stable husband and father sometime! do exactly not rush it! appreciate your single existence for somewhat after severe college or a minimum of do not marry for awhile. i don't be apologetic approximately it yet some days i wanted I had permit myself party somewhat in the previous I settled down. tell your mom a lot of human beings accessible are rooting for her! And thank you to bypass to you for helping her out. Your dad might desire to do it each and every each and every now and then too. ( I might desire to confess that my husband might nicely be a great help on Sunday's if he's not fishing.)