Does Marriage Counseling Work?

Question

I am 24 years old and have been married for 3 1/2 years to my husband. My marriage has been pretty rock for the last few months. We have taken on alot of obligations in the little time we have known each other. I guess my question is has anyone used marriage counseling and how does it work? I am leary of it because we will have a big fight and after the dust settles everything is great for a few days. I don't want ot get my hopes and think marriage counseling will work. I have reasearched it on the web and alot of people say they are worse off after the counseling.
Please tell me your experiences and how they structure it. Thanks

I am sorry I said I was 24 and I'm not mistype I am 25 not much difference, just don't like to put out incorrect info.

Answer 1

I have never been married and therefore have not used marriage counseling but I have always considered it as something that would help the relationship not hurt it. I am really surprised that people have told you they were worse off. I guess it depends on how willing the two of you are to work it out. The same kind of things goes for therapy. There is such a stigma attached to going to "see someone" but it means that you are taking life into your hands and trying to figure out why you are not as happy as you could be. People make a living being couselors and they often know what they are talking about. They are good a mediating and it allows both parties to be open and honest with eachother without getting into a fight. Sometimes it might be hard because it can reveal true feellings that you might not have known but I feel like it is always better to know then not to know. If some people were worse off it might mean that they learned things that made them realize that they are not supposed to be married. I know that is not something that you want and it seems like the problem with your relationship is the stress of the extra obligations. Before considering counseling maybe you should sit down and try to talk to him as calmly as possible. Fights always make it worse because the two people end up just made at eachother and even thouh the dust settles, have you really even fixed anything. Figure out why y'all are unhappy, maybe take more time out for yourselves. You also might want to think about the fact that you got married when you were pretty young. Some people get married and stay married forever, but sometimes people grow up and realize that they are changing and what they want in a significant other is different. I am no expert but I am 24 years old and am going through a really bad breakup with someone that I thought I would marry, we met 4 years ago, dated briefly, broke up, got back together and it seemed like we would never break up again. Now it seems like we are completely different people and I can't imagine if I had married him a year and a half ago when he seemed like it was the only thing he would talk about. My best friend got married a year ago and she said that she had gotten into fights with your husband that if they hadn't been married, they would have broken up. It just takes work and committment. If you love each other and want to stick it out for the long haul then you both need to be committed to working it out. Guys are very difficult when it comes to talking about their emotions and how they are feeling because they just want everything to come easy and that is just not the way it works sometimes. I don't know if any of this helps but good luck!

Answer 2

Yes it does if you and your spouse follow the instructions of the counselors.Not just listen to him,her or them,put what you too have heard into action.The counselor or counselors will make suggestions on what you too can do to make your marriage work better.The rest is up to you and him.Talk to him,let him know what you are feeling and what you would like for you both to do.The people who said that are worse off because they did not follow the program.To be honest,it's not so much that the counselor is giving you advice,because you and him already know what the problem is.It's being will to do what ever it takes to rectify the issues you too are having.

Answer 3

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Answer 4

It doesn't always work, in my opinion. I don't know what statistics show, but I would bet they aren't very encouraging.
That being said, I still think you owe it yourself and the marriage to at least attempt to work things out with a marriage counselor or psychologist.

Answer 5

Only if the people involved go in to it with an open spirit and are truly seeking resolution and assistance in negotiating their problems instead of looking for a pat on the back and being told they are right and the other is wrong. Its like anything else, if you go in to it with a bad attitude you are defeated before you ever start.

Answer 6

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Answer 7

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Answer 8

If you have a good counselor, and the couple is there because they want to be there and make it work.

Answer 9

if you don't get along now and you cant resolve your problems amongst the two of you who : love" each other.... don't waste the money.... get an early start on divorce papers

Answer 10

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