How do you know if husband is cheating?

Question

This is for you men mainly!!!!

I just got a call from a VERY reliable source that told me that my husband has been cheating on me. This person told me the name of the woman that he cheated on me with. I told my husband what I was told not accuse him. I told him I didn't believe it and when I told him what was said he got mad, threw his wedding ring at me and left.

Tell me why would he do this. Instead of telling me that he didn't he gets mad. I didn't accuse. I just told him what I was told.

How do you get through to people like this. If you have cheated what made you change if you went back to your wife. What should I do?

PLEASE give me good answers I really need help.

Answer 1

Sorry, honey, but the sad truth is...most people believe the best defense is an offense! Your husband has been caught, has flown into a rage in an attempt to make you believe that YOU are at fault. IF this were a lie, I suspect he would be shocked, he might laugh, but he would NOT fly into a rage and rip his wedding band off. I have been there, and this is NOT what I did. I owned up to the affair, admitted what had been going on...I had felt guilty as hell for a very long period and was tired of the feeling. I did NOT take my wedding band off. I did NOT blame my wife for the affair. But I am me... I can also tell you that I lived with someone who behaved exactly like this....everytime they were caught, the same thing...extreme anger that I would even think such a thing...even when I walked in on them, I was blamed!
You are with a loser, and it is not going to change. It is up to you, but if he will not come clean, you have little hope to build on. I am soooo very sorry you are in this spot. You have my sympathy fully. He isn't very nice, I will tell you that...and accept NO responsibility for this, for he is going to try to dump it all off on you...your did this, you didn't do that, everything will be your fault..don't you believe it for one second!

Answer 2

First of all, if the person that told you that considers her/him self a friend, you really have to think if she.he is really a friend.

A good friend would never bring discomfort to a friend.

Those are marital affairs which concern to the couple only.

Focus on this thought, not in the doubt if he is cheating on you or not.

He might or he might have not cheated on you. Let him cool off a little, when he comes back, you tell him that you were not accusing him, you were just telling him what you were told.

Don't change from being a good wife to a mean one, that makes things worse.

Don't go by what you are told, go by what you have witnessed yourself, you will be your best source of information, specially when it comes to your marriage and happiness. Gossip is evil.

Answer 3

I was once told by a man ( that cheated on his wife), if a man changes his routine then you need to start worrying.
Okay in your situation, it sounds like your husband has been caught and that is why he acted the way that he did. he didn't think that he would get caught. I personally would divorce him. the guy that told me what to watch for also told me that although he loves his wife with all his heart he wasn't sure that he could always be faithful, you might want to think about that, you know the saying once a cheater always a cheater, good luck

Answer 4

When he comes home be prepared for the truth or another lie. The truth will be that yes he was having an affair. You need to try in be ready for the truth and what you feel the consequences will be. If you want to hold on to this relationship be prepared for some serious counseling and continued pain. Like anything else you WILL get through this.

I also agree this was NO friend who called, it was some spiteful person that meant to cause you pain. If it was a friend they wold have went to your husband and allowed him to fess up first.

You sound like a nice person. Best of luck.

Answer 5

Here's what you do..stay calm..stay very, very calm....

Call the woman who just called you--and calmly ask her as many details as you can--try to find out everything..Then, ask her if she would be willing to call the "other woman" on a 3 way phone call--with you on the other end. When she does that--BE QUIET, DONT TALK, JUST LISTEN......Do not make your prescence known...Listen to see what the other woman will say, and if her facts are true..Also, find out her phone #...

Get your husband's old cell phone bills TODAYand see if HER NUMBER IS ON THERE...That will give you evidence.

I would say that body language is VERY important in life. Your husband threw his wedding ring at you. The wedding ring is a symbol of your marriage, and of his devotion to you..For whatver reason, it sounds like he has "had it" with the mariage for right now...

Look, I'm not telling you to divorce your husband tomorrow. Maybe you CAN work things out--I dont know. Maybe you can get counceling.

BUT, you should be tested to STD's and HIV very soon, since he might be putting you at risk..Make an appoitment to see your OB-GYN this week. Tell him to test you for STD's and HPV (the virus that causes genital warts)..I've known many married men who gave their wives STD's and even AIDS.

Good Luck
Peace

Answer 6

Sometimes when you are guilty in a situation .. you automatically get defensive. If you want to resolve the situation and move forward in your relationship, I would attempt to contact him, seek counseling and see where things lead you. However with that said, he needs to be honest with the situation, if he is cheating then he needs to end it now. Good luck and I really hope things work out for you

Hugs from a Loving Mom to a Brillant, as well as beautiful 8 year old Jared and Our Angel, Zachary (taken to soon but who will always remain in our heart) ~ Mel

Answer 7

So why could or not it fairly is considerable to tutor infidelity just to get divorced? If he supplies financial protection now, then a choose could anticipate him to furnish that once divorce. My feeling is he does not have a job and neither do you. He leaves for weeks and does not even call domicile to verify on the infants? great Dad you chosen to your infants. call it quits and concentration on your self and your infants. record for divorce so which you will get an order for newborn help for the infants and you will start up getting your existence back on course. Who cares if he's a cheater. he's clearly not a stable husband or a stable father. do not waste from now on time.

Answer 8

Hey hon, i proves clearly to u that he did cheated on u. Why on earth would he throw back his ring at you. You both need to have a very serious discussion abt this issue. It might take a while patching things up, but just hang in there.......goodluck!

Answer 9

any one who would do that instead of sitting down like an adult and talking with you about it..probably is cheating.you gave him a reason to leave you started a fight even though you don't think he is guilty he just found a Way out to go and see the other person.

Answer 10

well....if that happend to me and my hubby got angry in the sense that yours did, i would take it like he was angry cause he knew he got caught. so, hang in there hun. try to do some detective work on his butt! but act as though nothing happend. look for clues. for example: has his behavior toward you changed in any way? has his daily routines changed? does he work "after hours"? and etc. for what it's worth, i hope he's not cheating cause i know from experience what it feels like. it's no fun.
best wishes!
:-)