He is gonna go abroad to his friend's wedding. 2 months ago he said we will go together. He changes his mind. I didn't even ask him why....because it's hurt! He said, he has no money to pay for 2 persons. But I know he has more than enough money even for 4 persons. What do you think about him? please I really need an advice. By the way, I am a good looking woman, we have sex every night, good service, I am not lazy. I do all the housework.
2006-09-04 07:27:13 · 43 answers · asked by xx 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He warm me up, "how happy he will be on the beach, warm, relax". He takes 3days off. Yes i has no job. Because he won't me to get a job. I never demand anything. Comes home, he lies on the sofa while i cook dinner (iam a good cook, he said so), i serve him like a king while he wacth tele. Not because i don't realize he buly me but for me this marriage is my proud. In my family devorce is the worst thing.
He is a hard worker, self employee. sometimes very kind, sometimes very atitude, djudge character, moody, bosy., sometimes very fair. Become shelfis when someone won't be in the same way with him. But he is really helpfull to his friends esp women. He is a healer. He got a gift to do that. N he treat women nicer than men clien. We talked about that, n he said iam a jelouse person!
2006-09-04 20:55:32 · update #1
Read your last statement starting wiht I am a good looking woman
are you saying because you are good looking, done good service,not lazy, do all the house work he should have take you with him girl you need help
1- you should never have let him leave you behind with out a better reason than not having anough money
2- now tha tayou have done that get your self dress show how good looking you are call a few friends and get out of hte house
don't not answer the phone (hope you have caller ID)
but most of all have fun and insure that he knows it
because he is a dammass
2006-09-04 07:34:20 · answer #1 · answered by waiting for baby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure this has nothing to do with your looks, or how much housework you do.
Of course he HAS the money. Maybe, in the long run, he has a better use for it than to waste it on taking you to the wedding of someone you don't know. Maybe he's planning to have plenty of money when the two of you retire, and spending it now, means the two of you won't have it in later years.
Just because he HAS the money, doesn't mean it's wise to spend it right now.
You said it was HIS friend's wedding. Well, if you don't know his friend, you will most likely be left out of the conversation when they meet, and many other times while he's there, as he sees other people that you don't know.
It could be that he doesn't want to go either, if it means spending so much money on travel, but he feels obligated to be there for his friend's wedding.
If I were you, I would ask him about it. The least he can do, is explain why he doesn't want you to go.
Of course, judging by the way you write (you write very well, but it's obvious you don't live in the same country as me) you are definitely NOT an American. The domestic obligations of a wife are probably very different in your area than in mine, so use your own judgment on what you think would be a prudent way to go about asking him.
2006-09-04 08:54:13 · answer #2 · answered by 42ITUS™ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If men wants to leave you, no matter how good you are. They will just leave. Possible reasons may be he finds you are not his long term partner, he is not interested in you anymore or he finds another person more attractive.
If he has enough money to pay for you to go abroad as well and he's using this as an excuse not to go together, there must be a reason. But first of all, make sure he really has the money and not lying to you. If he does lie to you, when he comes back, ask for photos and if he enjoys it. Ask more questions about the wedding just as normal as if you really want to go with him. Then, ask if he's not in a good financial situation and ask if he's doing well and happy at work. Ask for if he's saving money for both of your big life plan, like buying a house in the future. If not, he has no reason not to pay for you to go to the wedding. Talk to him about your feeling towards this because you think you should go and congratulate his friends together as a couple.
From all of the info you gave, I could not tell how his character is like. I just think he should not leave you behind if he's your husband unless there's other reasonable reasons that he should honestly have told you.
2006-09-04 08:50:51 · answer #3 · answered by Sandy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband obviously has a "hidden agenda" that does NOT include you. Maybe he wants a get- a- way and do HIS own thing. You probably made it easy for him by not questioning his secrets because money isn't the real issue. He's selfish and I would have my doubts about him as a loving, caring, trusting husband esp if he's willing to leave you behind. After all, no good can come out of a married man traveling alone.
A woman's intuition is never wrong so I hope you get to the bottom of and get the answers you need. Good Luck.
2006-09-04 07:55:19 · answer #4 · answered by Bubbles 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes a fellow just needs to get away for a break, how long have you been married? Do you both work? do you communicate everyday like good old friends? Do you share your lives together?. These are questions you need to ask yourself and him
The other side of the coin could be that he found out someone is going to be at the wedding and wants to go alone to maybe flirt or more.
You need to talk to him, draw out of him why he is going alone, even if that means getting him all hot and bothered then ask him those questions. Men tend to be more willing to talk when the "other" brain is in control. :) All the best.
2006-09-04 07:35:42 · answer #5 · answered by rockey11 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry to say this but do you think he is cheating on you?
you need to have a long chat with him and sort things out! and think if he doesnt change do you want to spend the rest of your life with someone that has no respect for you? it sounds to me like you could do better!!
another thing you could do is play him at his own game! you go out all the time without him! why not book a holiday with your mates and don't take him - see how he likes it?
2006-09-04 10:09:11 · answer #6 · answered by lillypops 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well then if he has no finance issue then its clear that he doesnt want you to come along and its on you to discuss this with him and find the reason for his denial.......and trust me doing all the house work ,having sex every night and not being lazy are all reasons you dont need such reasons for your husband to love you and if you think you do all this in your marriage to make it work then i guess hes not the right guy,does he need a maid or a wife?you need to talk to him and get to know whats in his mind!!
2006-09-04 07:33:07 · answer #7 · answered by country_girl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well hes a foll if is doing that to u but I'm sure he will realise what a great woman u are and he will appreciate u more when he comes back don't worry about nothing u know what men they don't evaluate what they got but it always comes back to them I'm pretty sure for that all
i wish u all the best
2006-09-04 07:48:42 · answer #8 · answered by ina g 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear that. Just put it to bad luck to have such a husband. If you can't divorce him you will just have to accept him for what he is OR fight for your rights like going with him to attend the wedding. If you are weak and can't win this fight, then too bad. Just swallow it and accept. No one can fight your battles except you. Human beings are such that they will bully those who are easy to bully. He bullies you because he can, because you are not fierce, because you don't fight back. You need to change yourself to change your marriage dynamics. If you change yourself (be more fierce), automatically he will have to change too.
2006-09-04 21:41:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the secret to every relationship. TALK to him about it. Ask him why he doesn't want you to come. Get him to be honest with you. If he can't come clean he probably has a few secrets to hide he doesn't wan't you to know about. It's up to you to decide whether your relationship is still worth while depending upon his responses
2006-09-04 07:33:36 · answer #10 · answered by peter gunn 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋