Why is acceptance a concept that works only one way with many homosexuals?

Question

First-I am gay. Second, it seems that many people in the community find it hard to accept those who think differently than they do. ESPECIALLY when it comes to politics. I know many gay kids on campus and gay adults in the big city gay areas who demand that the world accept them for who they are, but they do accept other gays who are fat, conservative, or are not rainbow flag waving queers. Why is this?

Answer 1

Everyone has bias and bigotry towards something, someone, someway, somehow, sometime. Only by constantly monitoring ourselves can we do away with this nonsense. Although I understand the drive to let everyone know we are gay (sheer numbers are impressive), I am not so sure it is necessary as an issue other than letting others know we are here, and we are not going away. I do not understand issues as to politics...all are allowed to feel and think for themselves without my telling them they are wrong or them doing the same. I understand the feelings of avoidance when it comes to obese, but obese is NOT a reason to dislike someone, it may effect sexual attraction, but should not get in the way of friendship...we all are guilty of some of this, and we all can change...let's start today on making our lives a better place. Thanks for a good question.

Answer 2

Well I think that many of us think that political discourse disappears in the homosexual community. It does not, politics are politics gay or str8. I think that we fail to realize that we have diverse beliefs.

Heck I'm gay, but does that also mean that I expect everyone gay to agree with my political beliefs? No it doesn't, it simply means that we are both gay any other common ground we find will only be discovered in debate and discussion.

When you say acceptance of a concept works only one way with many homosexuals. Well I'd like to add that it applies to anything when there is no debate, nor discussion that allows for honest answers. So ambiguous is the question, yet the anger is clear

Answer 3

It appears to be human nature to disagree with/not accept others who are either different or have different opinions. That is a concept you can almost always count on, if your opinion is different, you are wrong in someone elses eyes. It is usually a very hard thing to accomplish, changing someones mind after they have a firm opinion on something. Everyone pretty much sees things differently, from their own perspective, it is what makes us individuals. You don't necessarily have to agree, but you should at least have the common courtesy to listen, befor you tell someone they are wrong!
Why is it when straight people see someone who is TG, they just assume they are gay?? I am almost bi, I don't like men per se', but have no problem with other TGs. I am a transgendered lesbian. Since I am not full time, I cannot go stealth, there are too many issues for me to overcome to transition, and I am happy, for now, with my dressing a few days a week. Every step has it's own problems to overcome, everyone should be allowed to move at their own pace. You accomplish nothing doing something for someone else's sake if you are not in that mind set too.

Answer 4

I may not be gay or a lesbian but I know from experience that most people do have pre-conceived ideas about what they see.I can't tolerate any kind of bigotry and or racism.I am a lower income white American that really cares about what I may say or do that can offend anyone.I do not care what religion,politics,color of their skin and sexual preference is.I only want to know each person for who they are, not for what they are.Excepting people for all their differences no matter what they are is the only way I know.I believe ignorance and fear are the reasons that most of them behave in that fashion.Ignorant to the fact that some who are gay do not follow their rules.To be in fear of those who do not act or look like themselves is another reason.

Answer 5

Many people in the gay community (but not all) want to have diversity in society, but will not tolerate diversity within their own LGBT community. Some are extremely intolerant of those people who are closeted (example: some web sites for gay writers will not allow posting of works whose authors use pseudonyms). Many gay people not only refuse to recognize bisexuality as a separate orientation, they are extremely biphobic. Some younger gays can't put themselves in the place of older gays who lived during a time when gays watched their step very carefully. And there are some who choose to berate those who choose to no longer live the gay life style. This gang mentality is very real among certain gay activists and their followers, you are very correct.

Answer 6

Im gay and I accept people for who they are as long as they are not hurting anyone physically or otherwise. Being a close minded conservative is hurting some one it is hurtin the people who think that way and people they teach that too. I dont agree with it, but I have no choice to accept it. IM a thick brutha and I understand what you mean as far as being not all that accepted in my community, but I have found comfort in myself and my looks. Plus I always got play so I wasnt to mad. But its a catch 22, homos are just as much as hypocritica as right wing conservative bible thumpers. We are human after all.

Answer 7

hmmmmmm -- well I can't comment on the fat part -- we have fat friends. I must say however that when it comes to conservatives -- I don't get it -- why? I grew up Republican. I VOTED for Republican candidates, I engaged them in conversations -- and I switched to be Democratic party right afterwards. I've been Democratic for most of my voting life -- but it was a choice that I made rationally. Please explain how it can be rational to support a party that openly and in its platform in many states opposes your right to exist and to have any form of rights.

I don't get it.

I suspect neither do they, they are just less polite about it.

Regards,

Reynolds Jones
Justice service Albany: http://www.rebuff.org/justice/
[e-mail]

Answer 8

I actually totally agree with you. Some people have too strong a political affliation to think through a situation logically. I'm bi and out but I'm not a liberal. I'm a libertarian, there are also a few homosexual republicans. I know what you mean though.

Answer 9

Because gay men and women are actually secretely exactly the same as straight men and women....we've the same opportunities to screw up and often do. I try to be kinder to others because of the cruelty that people have done to me...but many people respond to rejection by rejecting others in turn.

Answer 10

That's a good question and I would like to say that, if this was
a real culture and open to all who were the same, then it would not look like a select few. Few, being, white and young, educated and rich. There are churches who open and affirming to those not like them in lifestyle than they do to each other. I don't know the answer to that question? I would like to understand that too.