I have been dating her for a year and half.
2006-09-04 06:47:28 · 8 answers · asked by Kingford C 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
BooHoo. You lost your girlfriend. Soooo tragic. Why didn't you bother asking her to marry you, if you loved her so much? She probably got tired of being a "girlfriend" It amazes me that adults somehow feel that a person should feel they have some kind of committed relationship, when they haven't been asked to commit. Life isn't like high school, when you have your girlfriend wear your class ring, or varsity jacket as a symbol of your committment. You snoozed, you lost.
2006-09-04 07:41:47 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Several things might help you out here. One, she obviously didn't love you so seeing as how this relationship was a one way street it was most likely more the IDEA of her that you loved, the idea of what the two of you could be...it certainly wasn't the reality of the situation because this doesn't happen when you are talking about real love. Second, you be grateful that it happened now rather than 10 years after you married her and had 3 kids. I know it hurts but its a year and a half, it seems like a long time but in the grand scheme of things will be a mere blip on the radar. The only thing worse than going through this after the time you have invested is going through it after you have a lifetime invested. Now you are free to find someone who loves you the same way you love them, someone who wants the same things you do, someone you can spend your life with. In the meantime you have to grieve.
It takes time, but time in itself doesn't fix anything, its what you do with the time that counts. If you spend that time doing nothing but thinking about what was yesterday that is how you will spend your tomorrows. You have to grieve, but give yourself a limit, after that push yourself forward, no matter how much you don't want to, keep busy doing things that make you happy, at first it will serve no real purpose except distracting your brain, but eventually you will find joy in them again.
Take care of yourself physically, eat great meals just for you, don't start eating junk, its not good for you and you need to be physically strong and healthy if you are going to get to feeling better mentally. Read some great books, listen to great music, DANCE (nobody can be sad when they dance), work out, spend time with friends and family, take a class, play video games...whatever it is that distracts your brain. Do the things you gave up for your relationship. Soon you will find yourself understanding what went wrong and ready to try again. Good luck, be patient with yourself, and remember it will get better!
2006-09-04 06:54:38 · answer #2 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Consider yourself blessed. Presuming you are a good person (kind, considerate, compassionate, honest, wholesome), the woman is character deficient. Your sadness or feeling of hopelessness will pass. When thoughts of the chick enter your mind, just acknowledge them briefly then channel out to something positive. It is often said that we can CHOOSE how to feel. There is a lot of truth in this. After a break up it is best to spend a lot of time mate-less (at least 6 months, a year is better yet) to rediscover yourself and to see that you can be just fine and dandy alone. Plus you'll save some money. Do not look for a decent mate in a bar. In choosing a mate, in your case a woman, ask yourself, "Is she good mother material?" When we are hurting we make stupid choices. Typically, we try to hook up with another quickly to fill the emptyness. Bad idea. Just leads to more misery plus you haven't healed yet.
2006-09-04 07:13:16 · answer #3 · answered by orfinlimer 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Realize that you are better off without her. If you gave your heart to her and then she did that to you, you deserve somebody that will cherish you, not leave you for another man! So in the future you will thank her and not be resentful anymore.
I know it's a hard situation to deal with, but only time and a great group of supportive friends will help. Don't jump into anything too serious and be good to yourself. Watch out for #1
2006-09-04 07:18:42 · answer #4 · answered by Dre 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the future you will say "she did me a big favor". You got the experience of love but she freed you to find the person who is destined to be your permanent true love who will love you forever. It sure hurts like H-ll while it's happening though. Make sure you don't mope and get out with the guys. It's okay if you whine for a while, but not too long! Cheer up and good luck.
2006-09-04 06:54:13 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
well,it was not love,if you have lost it and that too because of some other guy....forget about her,how can you love someone who betrayed you,i guess you deserve someone better who would love and respect you the way you do,isn't it!!
just take up some sport,it'll help you build your self confidence and make new friends,dont cry over something that was never yours,i know it hurts,but the sooner you accept the fact,the better for you!!good luck!!
2006-09-04 07:19:18 · answer #6 · answered by country_girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
be around friends and family, do not resort to drugs or alchol it just ruins your life.it is hard, it will take time to get over her. it took me a year but we stayed friends and he would always say love you when we hung up the phone.I still am afraid to let anyone get that close again and i haven't . I don't ever want to feel that pain again.
2006-09-04 07:00:00 · answer #7 · answered by smurfette_ftwayne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your so called girl friend was never in love with you. Thats why you got dumped.
2006-09-04 08:16:40 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋