To young to have a baby?

Question

Im 18 with 3 good A Levels, and im off to university in a few weeks. Ive been with my boyfriend for over two years and we are deeply in love. About 5 months ago I had a miscarriage. The baby was'nt planned so it was a huge shock for me and my boyfriend, but we were happy. Obviously we were then devistated at what happened. I know how difficult raising a child would be, but i despratly long for a child, as does my boyfriend. I know the idal situation would be married with good career but my heart is telling me that now is the right time for me, and I know my boyfriend feels the same as we have discussed the issue at great length. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thankyou.

Answer 1

all i can say is make a good life b4 bringin a child in 2 the world cuz now i want what u have dont get me rong i love me baby i jus wish i would have waited u c im only 16 think how hard that must b 4 me i dont want u 2 go through it not yet any way

Answer 2

Having a baby is a lifetime commitment and at 18 you should be out enjoying what the world has to offer. You sound mature and able to cope, but think of the nights of no sleep while trying to study, the extra money you won't have, housing, food etc. Babies/children don't come cheap. Ask your parents or another person with grown children about the costs involved, the time involved, schooling etc. Many young people forget that babies don't stay that way, they grow into children, tweens, teens and then adults. They are your responsibility for a long time. My children have grown up and married and I still help them out at times as they are still my children and will be until my time on this earth has come. Make sure you both are ready and have talked about how you want a child raised and any beliefs you have in regards to religion, clothes, schooling, diet etc. If you do this now then you both will be happy together and so will any children you have. I wish you all the best in whatever you decide, but I say, wait a few more years and save some money towards your future needs.

Answer 3

First I want to say that, I had my son six days after I turned 19. So, I don't think that you are too young to be a good mother. I am sure that you know that it is not easy to raise a child, and that it is a lifelong commitment because that's obvious. I do want that if you guys feel that way why not get married, not that you have to be married to have a child. Also, if you are trying to go to school having a child probably will make it harder, because you might feel like you can't put your all into both of them, and you will have to worry about finishing school and working and being the best mom you want to be. But that can be done. You may want to think about how many children you want and how close you want to be. Like I said I was nineteen when i had my son and now he's six. I plan to have more children but i waited until i was a little better off, and I only wish that my children could be closer in age.

Answer 4

You are longing for the fairy tale and the romantic feelings that come with a baby. You need to be focused on a secure future. If you love any unborn baby you bring into the world you will offer that baby the benefit of a two parent family who are stable and committed through marriage. You are selling yourself and your baby short by offering he or she anything less. You have a entire future ahead of you and your youth is to be cherished. Enjoy being 18 and having a fun time and enjoy your boyfriend and hopefully if your relationship is strong it will led to marriage.

You will never be the same person you are at 18 that you are at 25 or 30. Give yourself time to learn from life and grow.

Your boyfriend must realize that he too has a lifetime ahead of him. He needs to be a stable man of character and love you and your child enough to offer you a lifetime commitment through marriage. 18 doesn't make you man!

Mourn your unborn baby and realize now you have been given the chance to get your life in order, enjoy life, and think about what really matters to a baby. Get your education and when you see the baby you longed so much for you can say look "Mommy and Daddy loved you so much we waited until we had the maturity and stability to offer you the world!" Isn't that fair enough?

Don't you dare settle for anything less for yourself or your child. Your boyfriend will have to realize that even the idea of a baby will need to involve marriage, maturity, and an education!

Don't bring a baby into the world with a job. Don't have a baby because you need to fill a whole inside of you. That isn't fair.

Answer 5

It sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders. Children are a huge responsibility. I am 27 and still not ready just yet. I think if you both are ready, then you will be fine. It is not a 50/50 deal though, you both have to be on board 100%. Life, marriage, and children are never 50/50 like most people think. Sometimes it will be 80/20, sometimes the other way, sometimes 100/0, you have to be prepared for it all. Know that it will never be about you and your boyfriend anymore, but your family first. You should also think about marriage, if your able to commit to a family, you should be able to commit to each other as well. Best wishes to you.

Answer 6

You need to ask yourself this question If you are going to be going to college full time who would take care of your baby while you are at school? And if the baby was in daycare how would you pay for that? Because if you are going to be in classes all day and be working to pay bills when would you have time to spend with the baby? I am not saying that you are too young because I was 19 when I got pregnant with my first but I wasn't in college either. Just think about those things. It would be really hard on you to do both college and be a mom because being a mom is a full time job with no pay except for the love of you child(ren).

Answer 7

I was 18 when I got pregnant with my second child. You are the only one who knows when the time is right. A lot of people don't think it's ideal to be unmarried with a 28 month old and a 16 month old. Do you think that makes me think any differently? Their father (my fiance) and I are VERY happy. Good luck to you.

Answer 8

I am a young mother. I have a 8 month old and i just turned 21. It is hard and when you see all your friends going out and partying you cant do that! my son was not planned but welcommed with loving arms. From experience it is hard! Me and my husband have our good and really bad times but once you have that kid your tied together for life! just make sure you are really ready and not going to regret it later on in life! Good luck!

Answer 9

You are TOO YOUNG to have baby right now coz you and your bf aren't capable to raise a baby presently. Do concentrate on your studies and get a stable and reputable career before you plan to start a family.

Answer 10

I WOULD SAY WAIT UNTIL YOU FINISH COLLEGE, IT WILL BE HARD TO FINISH WITH A CHILD IF YOU DON'T WANT TO WAIT THEN WAIT AFTER 6 MONTHS IF YOU STILL FEEL THE SAME THEN DO IT. ONLY YOU KNOW IF YOU ARE READY.