My husband's ex happens to be his sister in laws best friend. Family functions are frequently held at their home. The ex is more often than not invited to functions that are held by the sister in law, including things that should just be immediate family. The problem is now they consider her as "immediate" family. It has also been said to me by his mother that she is like a daughter in law, although they have never been married or engaged. Mind you initially she indicated that she did not care for her and was glad they never married or had children.
2006-09-03 21:53:04 · 14 answers · asked by erotic_songbird 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I don't think any one does! How ever they make friends with in the family and there by invited. You and your ex, you must remember, your problems are yours and not any one else's! This reality you must accept. It's called be a mature individual!
2006-09-03 22:00:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, that is a tough call and a personal one. I for one would not mind an "ex" showing up occassionally, but the family should take into acount the awakwardness it may cause you and your husband. Family gatherings are suppose to be fun and if the invitation list is causing problems then it has to change. It is easy for people to tell you to be the bigger person and just except the situation as is, but we are not living in your shoes.
If this is truly bothering you, to a point where you do not want to attend family gatherings, I would address it with your husband and he should take the issue up with his family. I know I would not want my girlfriend feeling awkward at one of my family functions. If this cannot be resolved and you just cannot bring yourself to attend the same function as this person then do not go. The family will get the picture soon enough. You can also plan some of the future functions to be held at your house and then you would not be obligated to invite this person.
2006-09-03 22:11:51 · answer #2 · answered by Mr Mojo Risin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
doesnt seem very nice of your mother in law to say to you she thinks of the ex as her daughter in law.doesnt the ex have family of her own? how does your husband feel about the situation, having his ex to functions(as you say) that should be of immediate family? how would your sister in law feel if the tables were turned and it were her husbands ex among family?other functions you dont have to attend and if you normally do (why?)maybe theyll ask why? its a sticky situation but seems your in-laws and ex could be more sensitive and considerate of your spouse and your marriage.should the ex find a companion will he accept invites to family deals too? i think he would think it odd. maybe your husband could bring up these points to his family stating he rather his ex not be any part of his family life (which includes his wife) but if they dont think there is any problem (?) youll both accept it because you love them and "real" family happiness is whats important and wouldnt want any of the family to be unhappy.(hint hint) thats just my oppinion, or bear with, maybe u just mean to blow off steam here. best wishes
2006-09-04 00:00:17 · answer #3 · answered by smilingbluelady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't be going to any family functions at the sister-in-law's house or at the mother-in-law's house either for that matter. If the in-laws are not sensitive enough to be discriminative about who they invite to "family" functions then the choice will have to be up to me and my husband.
2006-09-03 22:10:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My spouse would not pass to any function that my mom is in attendance. spouse has constantly felt that my mom grew to become into/is a racist for some reason. I bear in concepts while advised my mom that grew to become into going to marry somebody of a distinctive race and he or she grew to become into supportive yet warned me of ways racism nonetheless exists. Which i grew to become into and am responsive to yet think of issues are lots greater clever at present then they have been some years in the past. With that being mentioned its only greater ordinary if spouse would not attend my my mom is around using fact it only makes for a terrible time for spouse and that i. additionally while she did attend not purely grew to become into the form a terrible time might pay attention approximately it for days after-wards.
2016-10-01 07:12:21 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, if you are insecure, then you need to get over it ...he married YOU, not her ... and she is a close friend of his sister, so that is her "place" in the family. i can relate to having non-family members present at family functions, i think they do that so they wont have to discuss family issues that are unresolved. in any case, discuss your insecurity with your husband ... that particular problem is with you.
2006-09-03 22:01:19 · answer #6 · answered by casurfwatcher 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
They should be more careful and tactful with how you feel.. I dunlike wat your inlaws doin cos you may let it go these many times but not in the long run.Trust me!
And in the near future they will start comparing you with her especially if you have family squabble or maybe you had a little tiff with your husband..
2006-09-03 22:03:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmmmmmmmmm read it three times and can't figure out who is who.
But, there isn't much you can do except cause trouble and no one likes trouble. Just swallow your pride and tolerate it. I imagine this person will eventually move on.
2006-09-03 22:26:12 · answer #8 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope..
2006-09-03 21:54:18 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no i wouldn't but be the bigger person and if it bothers you that much stay away sometimes
2006-09-03 21:56:27 · answer #10 · answered by chunkybaby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋