2006-09-03 20:32:42 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Probably a little of both.
2006-09-03 20:41:39 · answer #1 · answered by not_prfikt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wanted to add to Mephistopheles' answer.
They think those things too, as well as the fear of the unknown (or being alone). For some, they know no other way/nothing else. It's all they know in life. Possibly they feel they DON'T deserve (a good relationship) it. They feel they won't find someone better, or that anyone would want them.
If they haven't seen what it is to be in a GOOD relationship, they have nothing to strive for or compare it to to make the right decision. Then how would they know it was bad for them either!? For some reason the bad stuff is easier to believe?! People can have a hard time accepting a compliment, but when criticized, can crush a person!
As odd as it may sound, they might even be scared of something good happening to them. Change, good or bad can be a scary thing!
People do what's comfortable, they could be staying for lack of $$, or kids (which is a bad thing to do anyway, kids aren't stupid). So instead of doing what's best, you stay since it would be better than being alone... choosing the lesser of the two evils...
Hope this helps!
=)
2006-09-03 21:18:20 · answer #2 · answered by tzbug_ybiaw 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I had a time I thought I couldn't leave an unhealthy relationship because I had no money and nowhere to go. I also felt that I've wasted my time and his if I give up and tried to make things better. My friends made me realize that I was wrong and that's when I left my ex.
In the town I live, it seems to me that the girls/women are scared to be alone in many cases. And some are too scared to leave and/or stay together for their children.
2006-09-03 20:48:52 · answer #3 · answered by fortuna0820 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very good question and the answer is both. They are scared to leave and scared to be alone. They are often blind and can't see an unhealthy relationship at first.
2006-09-03 20:50:27 · answer #4 · answered by heatherlynnmorrow 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people are scared to leave because they fear for their life. My sister just lost a long friend of hers because she left her abusive husband so he felt that if he can't have no one can. He killed her. Then some people have low self esteem and feel that the person they are with is the only one they can get. So they put them first and just stay there and get treated like crap. Then some people are already alone and love that person even if they hurt them because that is all they know. Many people have different stories you just have to ask around. We see real show like Jerry spring and cheaters. And we say, " all hell naw I would leave him/her or kick there ***" but if it happens to you, you would not no what your outcome will be. If I was to find out that my husband has cheated on me, I can't say that I would up and leave him because I would not. I would talk to him to see why and see how can we work it out. Now if he keeps doing it then he belongs to the other person and not me. I will ask him to leave, I will forgive him and move on with my life.
2006-09-03 20:42:40 · answer #5 · answered by sweetlee725 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some cannot support theirselves, some stay under the disillusionment that they can change the person they are with, they love them so much that they think that the person will get better. They make excuses for the persons bad behavior, or are in denial... some are scared to be alone and scared to leave, some have children and it makes the situation even more difficult, because they want to make it work for their children...it all depends many things can complicate the situation and make leaving not so simple
2006-09-03 20:38:32 · answer #6 · answered by hearts_bleed_dark 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe you just answered you own question. I believe it is that they are both scared to leave and scared of being alone. It is the physically abusive relationships that are the toughest for any person to leave. This is usually because of the fact that threats were made on thier life if they were to leave and they are afraid of their attacker.
Those who are afraid to be alone or have no where to go if they do leave is also a tough scenerio, being that they are caught in a "Catch-22" situation.
Any abusive relationship is difficult for the victim to leave for fear of retailiation from thier attacker. It is usually best to get the law involved as soon as abuse is certain, as to prevent the abuse from getting worst.
2006-09-03 20:46:05 · answer #7 · answered by Lonewolf 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are scared of the unknown. Their relationship maybe unhealthy, but they know what to expect. We humans are so habitual and fear anything different, especially, change of residence or partner. I guess it makes that person feel even more vulnerable than existing in an unhappy relationship.
2006-09-03 20:44:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think there is any one answer for that question. In many cases I think people don't realize they are even in an "unhealthy relationship" until after the relationship has ended or some event wakes them up to it. They are often in denial about it for many reasons.
2006-09-03 20:37:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are lots of reasons. Here are several I have seen lots of times:
-Don't want to be "a failure" at marriage
-Religious belief that divorce is wrong
-Don't want to be alone
-Can't afford to live alone
-Can't stand giving up the material benefits of the relationship
-Think it's better for the kids
-Think their parents will be disappointed in them
-Feel "Guilty" about giving up on their vows
-Too depressed to be able to make a decision
-Physically intimidated by abusive spouse
It's really sad, because people can waste their whole life in these unhappy relationships, and no one benefits from it.
2006-09-03 22:00:00 · answer #10 · answered by homebuyer 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i am struggling with this currently. unhealthy relationship, but i love her...no trust on either side. but we "care" for each other. i was told love is not the deciding factor in staying together...tons more.
but for me i am scared to be alone again...i like having someone, but it's not working and it's holding both of us back.
2006-09-03 20:41:26 · answer #11 · answered by pinched 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋