Your opinions?

Question

I have a friend who is short on money. She is trying to find a second job to help pay her bills. The issue is that she recently took her niece and nephew to Disney World. She could not afford that trip, but she said she really wanted to go back. In order to pay for the trip, she used her vacation check, took out 2 small, high-interest loans, and did not pay a bill. As a result her cell phone was shut off. In order to get it turned back on, she has to pay $285.00. She does not have the money to do this. Now, my church has a benevolent fund to help those who need a little help paying bills or buying food. My question is: should I tell my pastor about her? Knowing her nature, (she thinks she in the most important person in the world and the world should cater to her. She even thinks that God should be her personal "genie") I kind of don't want to help her, but as a Christian I know I should.

Her cell phone is her only phone.

Answer 1

She doesn't need a phone. She needs to learn some lessons about life. The church fund is more for people that are truly in need of help. The help she needs isn't money, it's sense.

Answer 2

I know you want to help her, however she must learn responsibility. There are times in this life that tough love is needed and this seems to be one. I am sure that she feels what she did for her family was a good thing but she also has to realize that providing for ones family is the most important. If the situation gets worse then maybe only if she is willing to volunteer at the church or helping someone else. A hand out isn't going to help her it will only open her eyes to ways to get out of a bill to buy something else.

Answer 3

If people keep bailing her out, than she will never learn to take care of herself. I used our church benevolent fund at one time, when my husband left (and left me with all the bills) and the bandk was getting ready to foreclose. The benevolent fund, in my opinion, needs to be for people who truly need help. If she really wanted a second job, she could find one. It is up to you, but I think that as a Christian, the best thing to do is let her find her own way. (by the way, I paid back EVERY cent). If someone like her gets the money, what happens if someone REALLY needs it and it is not there?

Answer 4

You can only help those who help themselves. I'm saying if she was someone who tried to pay her bills and did all she could and ended up short of money for food or her rent then you could help her. She knew what she was doing. If she has kids of her own and there is no food to eat or now she might get evicted from her house because she can't pay her rent then maybe yea you could help, but not for her cell phone or anything else. Save that money from your church for someone who is really trying and just had a hard month. Then pray for her to be more responsible.

Answer 5

THE CHURCH FUNDS SHOULD BE FOR PEOPLE WHO REALLY NEED HELP. SHE PUT HERSELF IN THAT POSITION SO SHE SHOULD GET A SECOND JOB TO FIX HER FINANCIAL SITUATION. SHE KNEW SHE COULDN'T AFFORD THE TRIP AND THE LOANS.

AND THEN TO THINK THE WORLD REVOLVES AROUND HER? THINK AGAIN!!!

A CELLPHONE IS NOT A NECESSITY. IT CAN STAY OFF. I KNOW YOU WANT TO HELP, BUT LET HER FIGURE THIS ONE OUT. YOU CAN HELP HER SET A BUDGET AND SCHEDULE FOR PAYING SOME OF THOSE BILLS. "DO NOT" GET THE CHURCH INVOLVED. THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT HERE WHO REALLY CAN'T AFFORD TO EAT OR PAY RENT AND THEY ARE NOT GOING ON TRIPS. THEY ARE LUCKY IF THEY CAN MAKE A TRIP TO THE GROCERY STORE. THEY NEED THE CHURCH MORE THAN SHE DOES.

Answer 6

As a non christian...I would like to ask a rather selfish question..

Would it make you feel any better to help this irresponsible woman?
Would it make any difference to her spending habits or her attitude?
Would she really thank god or would she just think "SUckas!"

In my belief, help should be given to the deserving.
Save your assistance for a more deserving person..
Your organisation is there to help those who WANT to help themselves.
That trip to Disney world was not thought about properly..
Short term gain equals long term pain.
Lucky the power was not cut off..
Save your money for a old lady's broken hip or something..
You'll think better of yourself

Answer 7

Church funds are for people that need food and shelter. Paying off a vacation is not good use of church money. How many people will continue to donate if they hear their money when to pay for a vacation for an undeserving person.

God helps those who help themselves. It doesn't sound like she is trying to help herself.

Answer 8

Gee, thats a hard question. It probably comes down to the "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" idea. If you were in need, wouldn't you hope that somebody helped you? I know if I fell on hard times I'd really appreciate some help.

That said, does your church have any way of holding the people it gives money to accountable to make sure that they're being good stewards? It'd be great if your church would teach those it helps how to be better stewards so they wouldn't need help in the future.

Answer 9

Benevolent offerings aren't for people who choose Disney World over paying bills, they're for people who really need help to make it. You can ask your pastor to pray for her, but I think she should work to solve this problem without taking money from those who really need it.

Answer 10

It would be wrong to ask for support from the church for your friend. The church emergency fund is just for THAT, an emergency, a disaster fund. I feel bad for your friend too. But sometimes it takes a few hard knocks to make us learn where to put our priorities and take responsibility for our own actions. You would be helping your friend the most if you let her learn how to take care of herself.