My mom is being mean ever since I told her I was gay. What do I do?

Question

I told my mom I was gay about a week ago and she refuses to believe me. My brother keeps on telling her that I am not and it's really getting on my nerves. Now my mom keeps on trying to change the way I dress, the way I do my hair, and everything about me just so I will not look "gay". She will not let me get my hair cut, which is a big problem because it will look bad if the sids aren't kept short because I have a mohawk. Today, she kicked me out of the house because she said I was getting on her nerves with all of my questions. She never did give me a good reason why I should have to change the way I look. So now I am at the dorm, alone, on labor day weekend. Sucks for me. What should I do? How do I get her to believe me and let me look the way I want? I am still kind of dependent on her so I don't want to mess it up so she will not give me money. She will not let me get a job and she says she will get me a car. How do I get all of this through to her without messing everything up?

Answer 1

screw her.... there comes a time in everyones life when they realize that the only person they can live for is themselves... if you are gay then just be, you can't change who you are... if your mom truly loves you she will come to terms with it and accept you for who you really are... if not, don't change to please someone else... because when it comes down to it... the only person you need to make happy is yourself...

Answer 2

zOne is to get a job If yopu are incollege a pert timne job perhaps in your aea of study Some comanies offer part time postions that pay decently to college students that study fields relating ot the company . .
This can lead to a very good paying full time job.
OK as a self empplyed person who has on occasion hired people . I am concened about how you look . you represent me . so i want you to have some modicum of a good apreance . Lose the mowhawk . It is ok for those kids who do not work and momy and daddy indulge them
your folks are not . Look average . Lose and faicial jewlery if you have any and are are looking for a job. If i see them on I do not even bother talking ot the person I politly tell them that I do not think they will work out . put it on when you are out having fun not at work .

Dress conservatively when looking for a job
it matters.
If you are in clloege go ot the counsleing center as they can help with yopur feelings . it sucks to be rejected for who you are .
By thise I mean a lesbian ypou have a right ot exist and love and be atracted to whomever you wish .

It sure sounds like you family has rejected you in a big way . It hurts alot . do not buy into any sloagasns or some 0ne who at ypour campus will be a instant friend . they are taking advantage of you .

Use Craigsl;sit to find other help and near by resporuses you can evenv barter for things . say i need a good typist and acoutant you need a room you do my avountiong I give you a room .
Seek pout organzationms tyhat yopu can find support in if you are incollege most golleges have a gay lesbain bi support gruop .Check em out .


And never assuem us straits all hate you . .

I do not mean ot be harsh about apreance but yeah it matters alot aso if you need a goo job look your best .
If you need medfical help ther are ways to find that . the internet isavaluable tool for it .
Good luck
Oh if you are a monor under 18 ypour mother cannot legally throw you aout that is child abandoment . a serioscrime in somestates a felony and not wel;lrecivedby inmates
so goto the child protection agency in your stare oreven the cops if you have to they will help yopu oput just leave out the gay stuff . cops get a bit funny about that though they should not In a university town they are more understanding ask to talk with a female officer if that helps .

But take care of you . and maybe in time your family wilaccept youi if not i find it sad and pathetic . i would not want them for relatives .

best of luck

Answer 3

Do you have another trusted family member or adult that you can seek help from in case of an emergency? That would be a very good idea.

She sounds a bit controlling. I think you should find a job but I really don't know how you can do that yet? Whatever you do, DO NOT drop out of school. That is the only way you can reach independence in this day and age. Since you live in the dorms on campus you should seek out a GLBT club or find compatible friends. In regards to talking to your mother, you should spend time just you and her and tell her how you feel.

Answer 4

OH HONEY I FEEL SO BAD FOR U. Why don't u try to just give her a call and just the two of u go to the park or somewhere,, where u can be alone. and just talk to her. Leave ur brother at home and get that one on one with mom. I believe that no matter if u choose ur sexuality or it just comes natural, u should do what makes u happy, and if ur underaged, then it may be best to do what mom wants, at least until u can take care of ursef fully.

Answer 5

YOU.. need to be patient.. this is going to take a while to sink in. First of all.. YOU need to write her a letter..let everything out..tell her how you feel and what you wish she would do as a mother. Tell her that this is you and that you are still the same person.. that you love and respect her and you wish she would do the same for you. Sometimes she will react depending on her origin or what country she is from.. I always say it is easier to say what you feel on a letter (If the other person will not listen to you in person). She will be calm when she reads and you will not be there to yell at or try to change anything. It might hurt her, because as parents whe think that anything that does not seem normal or accepted by society will hurt our children.. but in the end..she has to understand that this makes you happy and this is YOU..and she has to accept you the way you are....NO MATTER WHAT!!.. Good Luck!

Answer 6

Most parents would react that way because a mother wants her daughter to be a normal little girl. I am not saying that you are not, but to her it is not normal.

I have children and they are young right now if they told me that they were gay, I would except it but I would not be happy. That would take getting use too. Your mother should not have kicked you out, what she should of done is talk to you to try to understand. It is really hard for people that are straight to understand and you have to try to see it in her eyes.

I know it's hard and you want her to except you for who you are but you have to give her time because she will come around eventually.. Try to be patient with her.. (Good Luck)!!!!!

Answer 7

because of the fact which you're a trolling little turd who won't be able to safeguard those targets the place you're bare with that tall, handsome youngster on your technological awareness classification, so which you come back right here to bash gay human beings to objective and make your self experience much less gay. bypass connect the protection tension. you could gang rape 12 3 hundred and sixty 5 days previous women in remote places international places with your buddies who'll call you "fa&&ot" in case you do no longer connect in. then you definitely can pat your self on the back as quickly as back for being much less gay. top?

Answer 8

I'm reaaly glad you ask that question. sounds like you're going through a tough time. Hang in there.... IF you need to chat i'm available whenever possible.....alot of my friends or coming out of the closet with confessions like these because i listen and dont judge. Is she planning on letting you back into the house anytime soon? she can't do that to you...Parent tend to respond Psychologically bizzarre like they've never saw a gay before. I don't understand why people act that way. [e-mail] -----------IM me if you want:)

Answer 9

I'm sorry to hear that you have to go through all of that. However, you are an adult and your mother should love and accept you for who -you- are not who she wants you to be. Your mother loves you and she just needs time to accept this new facet of your life. You are still the same daughter that she raised and loved, but she may not welcome the new you so easily. I suggest that you give her space and reaffirm to yourself and to your mother who you are, who you want to be.

She cannot stop you from working and having a job. If she decides to cut you off or ignore you then you have to move on. It may hurt at first, but if there is one thing I have learned it is that no one else can live your life for you. So why bother letting them wield such power over you? Things have a way of working themselves out, so just be patient.

Answer 10

some parents take a while to get used to their kids being gay.the only way I can think of is if you are dating a girl and bring her home as your girlfriend.That's the only way you're mom will have to believe you're gay.don't listen to anyone who says repent or that liking females is wrong.You're the way god made you.besides on 6o seconds"born gay" , it is proven that it's something before a baby is born that sets if you're gay or straight.Like the enivronment in the womb as well as genetics.They studied twins.. one straight ,one gay.both raised the same.So it's definetly genetics..maybe you need to talk to your mom that this is you. this is how you were born.

Answer 11

Normal reaction by a mother! She has her own reason and rights to control you because you are still in her custody!She still loves and cares you as her little girl,but soon she will overcome that and accept what you are!Be yourself and natural but not to the extent that you become a blacksheep!Don't pretend like a girly type but behave as what she wants but feel free what is your feeling inside!You don't have to please her and someday soon you have to live your own and become independent,migrate to the place away from her and enjoy life but never condemned your mom because we have one and only mom in this world!Goodluck!