So my worst enemy just got a job working at the same business I'm employed at! I know I have to deal with her because I love my job. but I also know she took the job to piss me off! We don't work directly together all the time, but we will be on the same committees and need to communicate about some things. I can't even stand being in the same room with her. Is it stil professional if i try to limit our contact strictly to email and/or notes? And is it appropriate to ask why she took the job considering the bad situation between us?
2006-09-03 03:48:36 · 18 answers · asked by BJ 2 in Business & Finance ➔ Careers & Employment
By the way, I do not trust her and she is very manipulative. She has stabbed me in the back many times. How can we have a work relationship?
2006-09-03 03:50:23 · update #1
act like she is no one, like she is a totally new person now that she is in there. don't let those thoughts and feeling creep into you mind. you cannot control the fact that she has a job there now, but you can keep careful notes and records of your dealings. make sure you are always a total professional and don't fall into any traps she may set for you.
if things get ugly go to your boss and HR about the situation and show them your evidence.
don't put anything in email period!!!
if you have to do anything work related make it pure and simple, no undertones of the hatred you feel for her.
it's not going to be easy, but if she see's that she is getting to you she will take pleasure in that so don't buy into it. you were there first so work that angle and make your boss happy. then if anything happens they will stick up for you.
plus you can always transfer or look for a new company to work for, maybe even in a new town. sounds like you would like to be far away from this person, or who knows, she may wash out and end up quitting or getting fired.
check it out, don't let her ruin your situation....just let her be a nothing to you. if you give her the power to rule your emotions she wins.
Stay strong mentally and emotionally, you will be proud of yourself in the long run:)))
Good Luck!
p.s.
if you see her in the cross walk, try not to run over her...that would be a very unfortunate accident;-)
2006-09-03 03:54:06 · answer #1 · answered by rooster2381 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Firstly, I think limiting verbal contact with her is a good idea. Make sure when you talk to her on committees you keep your tone professional and calm, and pleasant. If you need to talk to her about shared projects or other business matters, make sure you do it when someone else is around to overhear. If she tries to talk to you when the two of you are alone, brush her off VERY politely, or depending on the office set up, try and walk slowly toward where others are as you talk.
Keep ALL copies of emails and notes between the two of you. If she is out to get you, then it's possible she will try and make things up. If she is slowing deadlines down, send her an email stating what you have done so far, and checking to see what she has done, that way it is clear exactly what you have done to date so she can't try and skew things later.
It's never a comfortable situation working with someone you hate but if you maintain your cool then she'll probably quit, or if she really has no interest in the job it will certainly be apparant to your bosses. Hope things pan out for you.
2006-09-03 03:59:24 · answer #2 · answered by Behhar B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I doubt she took the job just to get to you. She probably had to qualify for it, interview and be hired, etc. As soon as you evict her from living rent-free in your brain (adjust your attitude) you'll be much better off. From your description, she hasn't done anything unprofessional or vindictive at this job other than breathe the same air, which has gotten under you skin. Why don't you just calm down and continue to do the job you love so much the best you can and let the situation unfold naturally. If she is as horrible as you say, it will show and she won't succeed. If you make a big deal out of it and try to manipulate the issue, it's likely to backfire.
2006-09-03 03:58:49 · answer #3 · answered by misslabeled 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
treat her the same as anyone else you work with, no better no worse. I had a similar problem, my boss hired someone who I didnt like almost from day 1, (and I can get along with anyone.)this person was sooo argumentative; every single thing was a fight. After about 16 months, she got fired for refusing the boss's orders. Later, we found out she was plotting to take over the company and had all this personal email on her computer about how our boss is ruining the company, etc. Your coworker will sink or swim and all you need to do is take care of your job and only interact with her as much as you are required to. Email and notes are fine, but you will have to interact face to face sometimes. Just be professional. You DONT have to be friendly, just courteous. dont let her control your work life. In the large scheme of things, she doesnt matter. Good Luck.
2006-09-03 03:59:26 · answer #4 · answered by diques1018 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you've been there longer, you know the little intracacies that make that company tick. Use that to your advantage but don't stoop to sabotage. Limited contact is a good thing and be wary of information sharing... if she's done bad things in the past, she'll do it again. Don't give her the ammo to use against you. Also, use your contacts to stay informed and more knowledgable than her without allowing people to know what your intent is... This is just good common sense for any competative job. No sabotage, just moxy!
2006-09-03 03:59:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are in a pickle. My best advice is to take the higher road and be meticulously professional in all dealings with her. Show your employers that you only care about doing your job well, and that personal feelings about others are kept out of business.
Let her be the witch. Just be sure you document anything that she may attempt to undermine you on. Go about your work and behave in a very professional manner and you will be fine.
Karma will take care of her butt soon enough.
I know, I have dealt with this before.
2006-09-03 03:57:59 · answer #6 · answered by littleflower_57 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If your productivity is affected, you need to raise this with your supervisor, or your HR dept. If they are aware of a potential conflict, they may take action to avoid it. If they are not sensitive about it, and leave you alone on this, you'll have to limit your access to her only through emails. If you're slated for joint committee work, remind your boss of the conflict, and maybe only one of you will be assigned to the committee. Ask to be on a different committee.
2006-09-03 04:02:12 · answer #7 · answered by Arnold M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Two things you have to know in workplaces, one is do your job as best as you can, two is ignoring what annoying you, and always imagine that the person in front of you is a monkey and you know the monkey is an animal and the animal have special case to deal with, so don’t mix personal things with work, that will effect you’re ability to concentrate on your work.
2006-09-03 04:08:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
i would definitely limit the amount of contact that you have with her. don't give her any ammunition to use against you. don't ask her why she took the job because that could possibly lead to more trouble.i think that you should ignore her and do your job the best that you can. be careful, and don't let her get the best of you. Good Luck!
2006-09-03 03:59:49 · answer #9 · answered by bumblebee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
One thing that I've have learned in all my years of working. There is drama in the work place when you have a office full of women.
Women do not get along, they fight over attention, who is dress better, what they did over the weekend. This is a joke , as a man I just sit back and laugh.
2006-09-03 04:09:24 · answer #10 · answered by Grandpa Shark 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋