The area that my ex lives in has many negative people around who are always there. It's a small country town and you can't help seeing these people. My children would rather live with me then their father, but they miss their friends who all live there. As they are teenagers I understand that this is an important time for them to be with friends. I feel a strong need to be there for my children, but at the same time feel that I can't cope with all these negative people around me. I moved away for a fresh start. I had no idea my children would go back, as they didn't want to be near their father. Help me please! Tasha.
2006-09-03 03:13:32 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Tasha... your kids are in their teens... and you have a lot of free time on your hands now that they live with their Dad... just use some of that time to do te things you wanted to do when you were too busy being a mum...
If your kids are in their teens I dare say they are pretty capable of picking up a phone... you are afterall only a phone call away..
you don't need to martyr yourself simply because your kids want to live near their friends....
you can create a new life for yourself and simply let your kids know you are there when and if they need you... phone, email, text them a couple of times a week to maintain contact....
let your kids make choices for themselves.... but not for you...
your strong need is really only a way of telling yourself that your whole purposein life is to be there for your kids... that isnt true.. there is so much to do and experience in life.. and you can do that and still be emotionally there for your kids even if you live in different states...
2006-09-05 08:49:05 · answer #1 · answered by wollemi_pine_writer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Any thoughts that maybe your children might be wrong. If you and your ex were together and had to move would you have let your children stay back. You should not change your ways and just tell your children you are where you are and they can get to anytime they want. BUT! You cant move back because it hurts to much. I think they will understand.
Hold your ground. Your children wont stop loving you and in time they will return.
Move on in your life and enjoy what you can. Don't dwell on making everyone else happy. Your happiness is the only important thing at this time.
Good luck
2006-09-03 03:25:38 · answer #2 · answered by Mit 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not go back. Children are important, but you have a life also. Children in their teens think only of themselves. Children do not understand that they can make new friends. All people can make new friends. Consider why you left you ex and the negitive people in the first place. You can not live your life for others...... you can only give fifty percent..... they kids need to consider you and arrange to visit often.... if they must live for your ex and their friends
2006-09-03 03:53:38 · answer #3 · answered by bob n 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well,you cant stop living just because you dont like the people around you,why are you giving so much of importance to these people who mean nothing to you and your life.....your children are more important to you rather than these people,live for you children n not these negative people.....dont show the world that you are so weak n scared of facing them and so you ran away!!be a stronger person by being there with your kids who need you the most and live happy!!
2006-09-03 03:18:16 · answer #4 · answered by country_girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go halfway. Relocate to the next town over. Kids have cars. It's the best compromise you could make without compromising your own comfort bounderies.
2006-09-03 03:18:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
talk to the kids see if thy will go 1\2 way and if you can work it out with your ex good it's vary good for the kids do you want the love of your kids or your Nabors THINK ABOUT THAT
2006-09-03 04:02:00 · answer #6 · answered by freeman3905@sbcglobal.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let your children move back. You can visit them once or twice a month.
2006-09-03 03:19:20 · answer #7 · answered by Grace is a liar 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tater salad said it all.
2006-09-03 04:26:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋