Even though both my mother and father have passed on, I still feel anger about their alcoholism and their refusal to get into recovery. I used to be angry about the state taking me away from them...but now, after years and years, I see it differently. Had I been allowed to stay, I would not have the life and great experiences I've had since then!
Do you feel alcoholic parents never let you have a life...and for those who were able to get out, is your life better because of it?
2006-09-02 23:38:25 · 8 answers · asked by carledwards99andtonystewart20fan 3 in Social Science ➔ Other - Social Science
Sometimes there is only one alcoholic parent. And sometimes that person has such good control of their life that no one knows they are alcoholic. That was my father.
He was great and very successful in business, and he never let his drinking interfere with his work.
His relationship with me and my sister was good, he was a difficult partner for my mother. But he didn't know how to tell my beautiful brother that he loved him. A lot of the time, his anger was dirrected at my brother who didn't deserve it.
When my brother was 24, he had a wife and son. My father was angry with my brother. My brother was upset and while driving home he was in a wreck that broke his neck. His wife left and took his son and my brave brother lived 15 years in bed paralyzed. He died in 1996, a year after my father died.
I will always feel that all our lives would have been so much better if my father had the courage to admit he had a drinking problem and get help. I love him very much, and I miss him and my brother more than I can say.
2006-09-03 00:05:17 · answer #1 · answered by a_phantoms_rose 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My alcoholic parents lived for themselves, and only themselves. My life is better only because I worked hard to get them out of it. I really don't see any upside to it. I did not get out, I was not taken by any kind of child protection service. I put up with their abuse and raised their other child for them until I was finally allowed to move out at eighteen years old, and then had to deal with their harassment and constant interference in my life for another ten years after that.
Yeah, I guess you could say I'm carrying some anger around. The happiest day of my life will be the day when I wake up knowing that they're both dead.
2006-09-02 23:46:11 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yep, an asylum for sure, I don't think about it much anymore, I stayed out of the house as much as I could, I got beat up a lot, and mentally tortured, as a child it was unfair, the only thing that saved me was my great sense of humor, others have survived, you did too, some sort of survival mechanism takes over, and you get through it, (I had too, as a child I had nowhere else to go). I have a little boy now, he's going to be 4yrs old, there is NO drinking in this household, their is NO mental abuse, there is NO beating of children, just a happy normal 4 yr old little boy, I look at that little smiling face at me with "I LOVE YOU DADDY", and it made it all worthwhile, he'll never know hitting or abuse because I went through that Hell, and I'm going to make sure that he does'nt, so in a way, I took the hits for him, and never will there be one thrown at him, THE BUCK STOPS HERE !!!!!!!!
2006-09-02 23:55:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I share your feelings to an extent but fate stepped in. Both parents were alcoholics but we moved to Hong Kong when I was about 4, then my mother died, and after a time I was so detached from my father and his alcoholic abuse (a Chinese family had 'adopted' me) that I was literally sold to my Chinese father and I thank heaven for it. My life became a life. I am white and an American, but inside I am Chinese because of my Chinese father. I am grateful for Buddha showing the way to my current life. I am glad that I was able to get away from the shame, the abuse and the indifference of my biological parents..(I can't bring myself to call them mother or father) but my Chinese dad knows I worship him, and I love my Chinese brothers who helped to put my life back together.
2006-09-02 23:54:05 · answer #4 · answered by Frank 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Circumstances make you a better and a stronger person.
Plus you have the real life experience of being a child to alcoholic parents and you will never make your children go through the same things that you went through.
2006-09-02 23:40:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
My father was an alcoholic.. He was terrible towards me... My mom finally wised up and left him when I was 15 and my life has been great. I went to see him about a year ago, and he's claiming to be sober.. and denys everything that he has ever done to me and my mom.
2006-09-02 23:54:26 · answer #6 · answered by ExoticKiss 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forgive and try to be compassionate about the pain in their lives that brought about their addictions. You were cheated but so were they by missing out on you. It's easier said than done but you have to process the anger and take care of yourself.
2006-09-02 23:47:19 · answer #7 · answered by Timothy B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Being an alcoholic is pure hell. It's a heredetary disease. Think twice before you take a chance on passing it on.
2006-09-02 23:46:53 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋