Are you a shy adult?

Question

I am and i was wondering how you cope and does your shyness stop you from doing what you want to do in life. Im ashamed to say i used my children alot when they were growing up to talk to people ie stewardess on a plane or a shopkeeper to ask for something i wanted. Is shyness something that we are taught to be as children or are we predisposed to be shy by our personalities.?

Answer 1

I am too...i think it's something you inherit with your gens, or something because no one else in my family is shy...i think that, basicaly, its our incresed sensitivity and fear of being hurt or not being accepted...i learnt to overcome it though...if you have strong will power,you can do it too...just say yourself,you have to do it, and you will. I was afraid to talk to people on the phone, especially if i was calling for some information or something,i was also terribly shy when meeting new people and would have difficulties adjusting to new environment... but then, i don't know what came to me, i just said:okay, i've had it! i made myself talk to people, call them and so on, it was slow at first but i made it.i realised that if you are open minded,people will like you from the start and will accept you a lot easier. so i started joking around like i knew everyone for a long time and everyone liked it...and when you see that someone accepts it, you get all the self-confidence you need, and it's lot more easier to cope.
so my friendly advice is to relax,and loosen up a bit and just convince yourself that you have to do something. try just by talking to someone you've recently met,or your neighbour...once you see they won't hurt you or make you uncomfortable, you'll feel much better and you'll see that trying pays out...you'll see, you'll feel like you can do more and you'll want to do more...it'll get easier with time

Answer 2

No it fairly is not constantly actual. My son whilst he became little became rather shy. He had a head full of superbly curls that would desire to entice each and every stranger everywhere we went in public. The undesirable youngster could run and conceal. Then whilst he became approximately halfway via kindergarten the flood gates have been permit loose and he hasn't stopped. the instructor mentioned that she sees this each and every each and every now and then have been they ultimately come out of their shell and could make up for lost time. he's 10 now and that i swear he now could be time-honored with of everybody we run into. we've been on the save and he will say "hi Mike" to a pair unusual guy and that i would be like whose that honey and he will say oh it rather is between the adult males that placed the recent roof on the domicile 2 blocks down the line or it is the guy who became portray the hearth hydrants final week. I do think of you could unlearn it. Expecially once you have been around some effective people who make you sense as tho they have your back. i became shy whilst i became youthful yet then when I worked in some places with some stable self assured bosses I discovered the thank you to take value and not question myself everytime.

Answer 3

I am a shy man. I can go into town and only talk to shopkeepers and suchlike as I know they will be nice. The rest of the world I cannot talk to, it is too scary. If I do get into a conversation with someone it never gets anywhere. Needless to say, women do not like me, I have not had a date for about 7 years and have given up on love, it has passed me by forever.

Answer 4

i'm 22 and i have to say i'm predisposed to shyness, i have to try really hard to not feel afraid of talking to others. Even then shyness is not so simple, i also have a hard time holding a conversation with other people for any length of time.

So in my opinion there are different reasons for shy behaviour, that affect different parts of our lives. The end result is called shyness.Fixing your reasons for being shy would change it, if you could change.

Answer 5

Yes I am.
It's kind of both, really; environment plays a significant role, for instance, my parents used to make decisions for me as a child, preventing me from taking any initiative, thus, making me feel uncertain about my judgement. Also, I was literally treated like a princess so I grew up with the thought that everyone is bound to treat me the same. As you can imagine, I was extremely disappointed discovering that real world does not work like that and I was far from a princess in their eyes... It took me a while to recover from the shock and I learnt to put my pride and sense of dignity aside in order to achieve things. So, to put it in a nutshell, our upbringing has definitely affected the development of our personality but, it's really up to us to change things and make our dreams come true. It's very hard, I know. I'm still working on it myself. I still find it difficult to talk to people and do the things I want. However, I have improved a lot since being a teenager and that I owe to counselling; talking about your worries with someone who knows the world can really help, since you begin to understand that the world is just like that everywhere and to everyone. For example, I used to believe that rudeness was a sign of people's dislike to me but, now I know that it could be many things: a bad day at work, lack of manners, insecurity hidden under the veil of aggressiveness, even jealousy. Learning not to take things personally is an extremely important step in overcoming your shyness. I wish you and your children all the best in life. Take care and good luck!

Answer 6

i agree i used my children all the time still do it is shamefull but i get really nervouse alot sometimes i cant even go out my door and anther thing i never answer the door i can talk like this to strangers but i wouldnt be able to do it through a web cam i think its more to do with personality really when it comes to shyness i think im the worst case and yet ill tell my kids to stop being so shy im a hypocrite

Answer 7

I've been shy all my life.I hate it when I first meet people socially as I really get tongue tied and appear aloof and uninterested.If I get a second/third opportunity I loosen up somewhat and feel more comfortable.I really have difficulties with this as in my job I have to reach out to people in order to help them and I do it successfully, but when it comes to doing it for myself I'd rather not bother as I find it very stressful.
I believe it is nurture not nature as my mum is quite an introvert and as a child I can remember her saying 'oh you can't do that' or 'you wouldn't like that'.You hear it often enough and you believe it

Answer 8

I am shy in front of other people and hate having to go up to others and ask for something. I go red in the face and stammer everytime I have to do this. Once at the cinema I almost got double my order of ice-cream because of my stammer. I think we are predisposed of this because of our personality.

Answer 9

I think it's a matter of insecurity. I have been shy most of my life and I know I am insecure so I put 2 and 2 together. It's a matter of not having the confidence to say what you really want to because you are scared of what other people will think of you.

Answer 10

I am an introvert but i would not call myself shy. Shyness is a lack of confidence in yourself, look back in your life and find what it was that made you shy, it,s always a reason, confront it, then you can deal with it.