I have been married for 10 years. My wife is not intrested in sex anymore. What should i do?

Question

I've tried everything that i know to try. The sad part is we are both only around 30 years old. We get along great and the only thing we argue about is sex (or the lack of it). I want to and she does not.

Answer 1

time for a new wife. Wow thats easy.

Answer 2

ok now that the children have answered.... maybe she is stressed out...or overworked... or both....do you help with the household chores such as laundry, cooking cleaning... and be honest... how long has it been since you took her out for a romantic meal... and no the ambience that is at the golden arches don't count.... have you ever ran a hot both for her and started some scented candles going and told the kids, other family members, touch that door and its your a$s.... how long since you came home and said "honey I got a surprise and took her to a very nice hotel and ordered room service.... how long since you have given her a FULL body massage.... or said honey I'm cooking or even said honey I've made a reservation at the spa for the day and your getting the full treatment or even had a massage therapist come to your home.... or have you ever done a strip-tease for her???? I know it takes 2 to make a relationship but obviously you both are thinking I am doing all I can and its up to the other if they want anything..... just a thought..... the rose thing and candy are soooooo over unless she likes flowers then give her more..... People get tired of the mundane its time to put the spontaneous and fun back... thats what you work for after all not just to give all your money to the bank and creditors

Answer 3

Romance her like you did when you met. Remind her to never loose the emotions or feelings you had for each when you met. I have been married 20 yrs and have never lost sight of the way I feel about my husband in my heart. I have the same problem with him sometimes but in a marriage it is ok for you to allow yourselves to let sex not be the only reason why you are together. Sex every once in while can be better then the sex you have all the time. Because time allows you to rediscover each other, to explore each other all over again, and rekendle bury feelings for each you thought may have been gone forever. Sometimes your spouce man or woman will need their own space. It doesnt mean the other is cheating on you. And there may times you put her threw the same thing you are going threw without even knowing you are doing it. Sometimes in marriage it can be very lonely, but take my word for it, once you finally make love again, even if its a one night stand with your spouce, can mean more then having sex every night. You have somply got to learn to give her permission to take some time away from having sex or having it expected of her. Hugs and kisses work wonders when you only have those to live on together.

Answer 4

I feel for you. I've had the same problem with my husband. You start to lose your mind after a while. See a therapist before it's too late. It could be a number of things like depression, childhood sexual abuse, marital resentment, chronic fatigue. She could be having an affair or discovered that she's a lesbian. There is absolutely no telling but who wants to live without sex the rest of their lives? I hope your wife will go to therapy. My husband goes to one or two sessions and then quits. After a few years of this my patience has run thin so we're separated now. I hope you have a better outcome. Good luck.

Answer 5

Romance her! Make her feel loved and cherished all over again. Sometimes after being in a relationship for that long things start to become stale. But, that can be helped! Do date night once a week. Role play. Take a trip. Anything that is out of the norm from what you guys usually do.

Good luck!

Answer 6

Men like sex, women like romance. Once you've been married for a while, it's hard to keep romance alive, but if you can, she will come around, at least sometimes.

If she is open to talking to a doctor about her sex drive, by all means do that too. However, good luck with that.

Try to think of things to do together other than sex, because women want to feel secure, and important to their mate.

Answer 7

Try couples counseling; it would be interesting to know WHY she's turned off to sex at such a young age. Do you neglect to shower or brush your teeth? Are you a clumsy lover who only thinks of his own pleasure, rolling off after 10 seconds of bang-bang and going to sleep?

If she's just plain not interested, then ask her if it's okay if you find a lady whose husband isn't interested in sex any more so you and she can relieve each other's itch. If it's not something she wants, she shouldn't have any objection to your giving it away elsewhere.

Answer 8

counseling would at least get the matter out and open for discussion. Having a counselor to mediate the matter can offer some insight for the both of you.Sex is not everything in a marriage but its as vital as any or all other parts of marriage.

Answer 9

regrettably, her decision to stay with out intercourse immediately seals your destiny in case you will proceed to be married and "not working around." using fact the alternative impacts the two companions, and you have for sure commemorated her desires, she could evaluate doing the comparable. Ask if she might compromise for the sake of your marriage, and enable her be responsive to how frequently you will possibly desire to be together with her in element. then you certainly purchase the candles and the wine, serve the (take out?) dinner....and wreck purely her....enable her be responsive to you think of she is attractive. while grew to become into the final time you mentioned something like that? start up practising. After 15 years, she thinks she's considered all of it. instruct her in yet otherwise. Oh, and p.s........exhaustion kills a intercourse force. take a glance at what she has to end in an afternoon in the previous making a turn around and having to "get interior the temper." you're able to desire to could desire to get that bathing room wiped sparkling and vacuum the living room in the previous you get romantic if she would be in a position to't enable the enjoyed ones chores pass.... i'm 40 8 and we've 3 little ones over the age of 13 living with us. I even have found out to enable the dishes take a seat, or to not try this final 10 multiple laundry in the previous I spend time with him. this is going to in no way pass away and all we are certain at the same time is now. we've a great relationship, however the abode could be slightly a large number. not all women human beings can only enable pass of those products. See if your bigger participation with enjoyed ones maintenence would not perk her up slightly. And final, my guy asks me regular if there is something he can do for me. I honestly take excitement in it. He cares. Ask her, "hon, what am i able to do for you at present?" and persist with by way of.

Answer 10

This may not be your answer.but I went through the exact same thing, tried dinners,dances romance etc..nothing then after some seroius conversations(many of them) My wife finally saw a good doc who suspected depression off to the specialist and a small white pill and our sex,marriage,relationship is smokin!!! Years of careers,kids,finances etc.. can take their toll.

Answer 11

shes in her early 30's.. ok stop getting upset.. i know its frusterating but this happened to my girlfriend.. she went into a sex funk right before she hit her sexual peak.. she was zero interested in sex with her husband and she had no clue why herself, she didnt understand what was wrong with her, but she just was turned off by the thought of sex.. , then BOOM she turned into a sex freak when she hit her peek, lol so this could be what she's going through as well.. so be patient.. and act as if u dont want it for awhile urself, usually that will make someone want it more if u act like u dont want it yourself..

And save up cause if she's going through what my gf went through , ur gonna need all the energy u can when her sexual peek comes in lol..