im 15 and a mom and all the dad wants to do is party and his parents don't care.my mom kicked me out i'm living with my new boyfriend he wants to get married and call my 6 month old baby girl his daughter.i said i have to think about it.he wants me to deliver another kid to so he has his own along with mine.should i or now we have been dating for three months.he said that if i don't want to have anther kid right now that he understands and that he will always love me.he just met my little girl she likes him.before he saw her he thought i got an abortion he asked me why i've been lieing to him.then he poped the question.please help what do i do????????
2006-09-02 03:26:11 · 15 answers · asked by *shorty* giggles 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
How old is the new bf? If you're both still under 18 you're both still minors and will most likely need parental signatures to marry.
The new bf's marriage proposal sounds good but it also sounds too soon to me if you've only been dating 3 months.
Aren't you both trying to go to school and finish your education? My suggestion would be to do that first.'
2006-09-02 03:34:30 · answer #1 · answered by Bluealt 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should tell him that you aren't ready to have another child yet, since not only did you not plan on having the firts one yet, but doctors advise on waiting at least one year, and it's better to wait at least two, before becoming pregnant again, to let your body have time to recover.
Tell him that while you do love him (if you really do), you don't want to rush into anything, because you have your daughter to think about now. You have only been dating for three months, and that's just not long enough. Just continue with the way that things are for now, and in a few more months, say when your daughter turns 1, if you both still feel the same way, and things are still going good, then maybe it would be time to consider an engagement.
And my best advice would be to make it a long engagement, about a year, because not only is planning a wedding difficult and expensive, but it's very stressful and it could bring out a side of each of you that neither had seen before.
I think that fifteen is too young to be married, but it's not too young to be in love, so if you really feel that you are in love, you really probably are. But at fifteen, you still need a parents consent to marry, and it would be a lot easier to wait until you don't.
If he really loves you and wants to marry you, I think that he will agree to wait.
2006-09-02 15:33:53 · answer #2 · answered by Queen Queso 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh sweetheart, my heart is crying for you! Please Please don't have another child with this "boyfriend." Plus how old is this boyfriend? Even if he is your age, don't fall into the trap of "I love you." Being a teenager, having a child, and a husband is something that should wait until you can provide financial and emotional support for yourself and your little girl. Have you looked into whether you can even legally get married? It sounds like life dealt you a harsh beginning....no Mother should kick their child and their grandchild to the curb! There are several organizations that can help you. Please go find a church organization and ask for assistance. You can decide whether the future will be promising by what you do.....finish high school, get higher education, help is there if you look!
http://www.fsu.edu/~voluntee/news/cope.html
http://www.foothillsonline.org/heavensent/about.html
Go to this site and read about other teens who have been in your situation.
http://www.lifecall.org/shelters.html
*For the person who told this young lady to go on springer show, is this the type of advice you would want?
God bless and I hope you find the support and shelter.
2006-09-02 03:53:12 · answer #3 · answered by river 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Look I was a teenage mom at 16. His father was 23 and went to prison (for unrelated issues) before I even found out I was pregnant. I have been on my own for 8 years now. I had "boyfriends" who promised to take care of my and my son but when they realized I couldnt go out or I had to take my son with me they found other girls without responibilities. I myself was kicked out on the street when I was pregnant, I lived with my friend even lived out of my car for a while. PLEASE dont have another baby. it wouldnt be fair for these children or you to live like that. Concentrate on taking care of your baby tell this guy you will marry him after you turn 18 and can financially afford to be married and have children. When I turned 18 I got my GED went to school to become a pharmacy technician and got a job. I wasnt making alot of money but I was able to support my son. Then later I was able to go and get a college degree in criminal justice. Think about things you really have no permanant home, you cant get a job and you are all your baby will ever really have. Believe me I was told all this that I am telling you before I had my son and I didnt listen I struggle so hard to give my son the best and my best was the bare minimum. If you need to talk please feel free to email me I think I can really open your eyes.
2006-09-02 04:15:10 · answer #4 · answered by ArmyWife 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Holy crap. That's quite a situation! I think it's creepy that he wants to marry you after dating for three months. I would dump him and move on. He sounds like a loser partying all the time. He would not make a very responsible husband. Do you REALLY want to have another baby so soon? Wasn't childbirth hard for you?
2006-09-02 03:35:04 · answer #5 · answered by songbird 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you love your baby don't do this to her. She needs you, all of you, to grow with all that you can get and give her. That means love and attention as well as food and all the other stuff that goes with raising a baby.You can't be working at your age so are you on handouts/social? Double your trouble with another one and what chance do either of them have? Love yourself and your baby first before you can even think of getting married. Get yourself educated asap!!! Use protection!!!!Take care and don't make anymore crazy mistakes.
2006-09-05 17:59:50 · answer #6 · answered by sinned 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the last thing you need right now is another child. how old is this new guy? If he's under 18, then he's just sweet and aware of the enormity of what he's proposing. If he's over 18, you are using this new guy and his willingness to take you on should be warning bells to you. might not be too long before your daughter winds up sexually abused.
2006-09-02 10:30:36 · answer #7 · answered by cassandra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Umm... let me see your 15 and can't get legally married until about 18, your already thinking of getting another child... hmm... I think you need to slow down and try to live like a 15 year as much as possible as you can... if your even telling the truth!
2006-09-02 03:34:26 · answer #8 · answered by Sam 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to finish high school. You already have one child. You do not need anymore. If you want a good future for yourself and your daughter get an education.
2006-09-02 05:05:32 · answer #9 · answered by Coast2CoastChat.com 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't get married! you're too young. WAY to young. i'm 15 and i can't even begin to imagine myself with a baby even. take it slow with your boyfriend and try to make peace with your mom. you should be living with your parents anyway.
2006-09-02 03:48:31 · answer #10 · answered by Krissi 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋