My wife shows no interest in me anymore. She works late more, goes out of town with men co-workers on business trips, hides the fact from me, and says i don't trust her is why she didn't tell me she was with a man. Should I trust her? She dresses off the scale nice for work, but is totally the opposite with me. She don't seem to care where I go, or when I come back, and won't go anywhere with me socially. Outside of this she is good as gold to me. She has admitted to cheating on me but says that was when we were split up and thats the only time. The problem I can't ever get around is i have saw her with my own eyes all over another man and she will never admit it. This tears at my heart but I stay with her anyway. Should I stay? Should I leave? Financially I can't afford to leave. I feel trapped and want to believe in her, but I don't know what to do. She claims she will go to counseling with me, but never makes an effort to do it, I just hurt all over, and don't know what to do?
2006-09-02 00:21:54 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Ok. Listen, if YOU have seen with your own eyes her cheating on you, and yet she still won't admit it, she needs to go! How many other lies has she gotten away with? Forget financially, this mentally how this is affecting you. It sounds like she is more interested in getting sex off other men, and that isn't right. You might financially struggle without her, but move on. You can't stay in a relationship if you're not happy, your partner is cheating on you and you're upset JUST because of financial issues.
If you don't want to do that then cheat on her, right infront of her face! And if she confronts you say you didn't do it, (with a big grin on your face ofcourse), and then say that you were out with a girl but you didn't want to tell her because you know that she doesn't trust you then say that it's over between you 2 because she isn't trusting you. I'm so evil :)
2006-09-02 00:30:27 · answer #1 · answered by susanradford18 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, think what you have done wrong to her. Do you think you did or said something that offended or disturbed her in any way?
Second, strive to be a better person for her. If you really love her, you would believe in her, no matter the situation.
Third, if the man she likes is only about looks, I think she'll soon realize that he's not worth it. I think what a woman really wants is someone who is unique to her. Looks < Inner Beauty
Lastly, Stay Positive. Put this in your heart, "Do Good Things, And Good Things Will Happen To You". If you believe you are doing the right thing, good things await you.
Hoped this helped, kinda new here in Yahoo!Answers ^_^;;;
2006-09-02 00:46:04 · answer #2 · answered by Lonez 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds like she is also staying because of finances. im actually in that same situation. im the wife.
take income tax money for the year. and get yourself out. or start paying off bills. and wait till next year and leave. a year usually helps. figure out how to get yourself out and on your own again. and forget her, obviously, she wants out too. but seems like the finances for both are keeping both from moving on and being happy.
both are not happy at all. maybe go to counseling without her. you could do it without her. just to help yourself.
how is she "good as gold" to you?? if you dont trust her, she wont dress nice for you, and she wont have sex with you, and she dont want to be seen with you, and hides things from you??
what does she do for you???!!!!
you have to make up YOUR own mind, of what you want in a marriage, and if this is not it, then YOU change your part. you cant change her.
good luck, you should leave her and get a divorce.
2006-09-02 00:37:56 · answer #3 · answered by cats3inhouse 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are totally depend on her , you have no right to seek any more comfirt or joy . Better start looking for some respectable regular career oriented job , then you must , just leave her alone and find another good girl for you .
Or you must start looking after your health by regular jogging , excercise and maditation . Practice to maintain neat and clean fresh house . Learn to cook some good food . When she comes in the evening , offer her nice evenings by joining her for dance & dinner in the house itself, cooked by you . I am sure you will get what you are seeking for ( big nights ) Good luck
2006-09-02 00:32:56 · answer #4 · answered by your noon 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i hoping you dont have children... if you dont then is this the behavior you want your child to act like???? if you where to counsel your daughter, what would you say?? now take that advice and move on it. as far as finacially you cant afford to leave only says you like the accomadations and are not willing to work more for less. <~~ thats not an insult. as alot of are like that in the fact that we want to enjoy ourselves to the fullest. you can affors to live it just means youll have to put off some relaxation for a period of time and live less then what your doing right now. you have a "power wife" and its more likely youll loose her before she is willing to give on a highlife. im not saying divorce just yet but i think you need to not only store money away if you can but look around and take stock on what if it ends how will i manage, where will i live, prepare for the worst and hope for the best. again i say store money away worst case you need it for living awayfrom your wife best case you have money for a great present and alot of flowers...... good luck
2006-09-02 00:35:57 · answer #5 · answered by joe 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Leave her with an ultimatum: She moves out until your demands are met, and if they aren't met divorce her. Marriage is not a contract for abuse. You may not have a lot of money,but you are paying dearly if you stay in a marriage in which your wife takes advantage of you. If she knows you'll leave her, she might change her tune.
2006-09-02 00:35:30 · answer #6 · answered by socrmom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Famililarity breeds contempt so they say, once the excitement of the unknown is no longer there the thrill of discovery goes real quick
2006-09-02 00:27:56 · answer #7 · answered by Tracy S 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You let her walk all over you and you wonder why she does what she does. Either get a backbone and stand up for yourself or be prepared to live like this the rest of your life.
2006-09-02 02:20:02 · answer #8 · answered by yooper guy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
to hav only a sexual relationship is ok but i find
its better to hav a mental and spiritual connection with someone
i dont mean spiritual in
a stuffy and intelectual way,,,,this is how i look at
my girlfrend--she's an amazin human being who's
strugglin thru life like everyone else, who's lookin for answers
and i want to know her life,how she feels
2006-09-02 01:14:14 · answer #9 · answered by heartofglass 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I had to choose between mental health and money, I will always choose mental health. All of the signs of her cheating on you are there.......don't you think you owe it to yourself to be happy?? As the saying goes, I'd rather be miserable by myself, than be miserable with somebody else.
2006-09-02 19:34:06 · answer #10 · answered by roccoq 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋