I'm a over_bearded sikh 18 year old boy ,single from ever. help !!!!?

Question

I'm 18 looking 22 kind-a -boy. I have all the qualities of a lovable guy but traditions r stopping me from being happy.I can't cut my hairs which gets me depressed sometimes because i can't have happy love life. Girl's speak to me and laugh at my jokes but I've had many blank looks too.My prents wouldn't like if it if I disobey. I love them .but get me out of this

Its just the tradition that I have a problem with . My parents have given me so much .Now they need me.I'm too senti and kind person to leave them. They don't understand me.Its as big a decision as marriage.Everybody u know has something to say.

There u go man lincoln.I like that but the problem is my life, my dreams depend on my body. I want to be a filmmaker or actor someday. But this tradition is an obstacle .Girls r not all but they r a part of every guys life. I just want to live a normal life.

Thank u for the ans but believe me my prnts r not happy either. They fight evyday and r on th\e verge of killing each other on the drop of a pin so that ont help. But ther were 2 irls i felt nice about but both never gave me a second look. Girls r not that important but my future is. I dont want to be the most famous but atleast the guy who looks fine . Life' hell.

Answer 1

you are 18. move away from your parents. call and visit them regularly but dont let them control your life.

Answer 2

Hey I know that at 18 it feels that life is running past you like a juggernaut and you are not on board.....But take a deep breath and look around you.

You don't need to be the most popular guy on the block girl wise to validate yourself.

It sounds as if the girls you are spending time with are not the brightest stars in the firmament. What about girls from your own culture who are going to understand your thinking? There must be a lot of them around who feel just as imprisoned and confused as you.

I know that it is impossible to think about, but your parents were your age once with all the emotional turmoil that you are going through. Try sitting down and getting them to open up, alone not together or it won't work, about when they were teenagers. You will find that they have stories to tell that will make you re evaluate how you see them.

They made it in life didn't they?! They have you for a son to be proud of , so they must have done alright.

Lastly contrary to what the pop culture media would have you believe, girl /boy relationships are not a sign that your life is running at half mast or full speed.They are simply a part of the dizzying variety that makes up a life.

Good luck.

Answer 3

Hi Inder,
This is jaspreet. I understand your position. But it is you who makes a decision for your life. Honestly, you have to make a decision and than stick with it. Being a sikh is not that bad. On the outside, it may seem to be a disadvantage but it is not. In my view sardars get beautiful wives. Talking about your future and career, look around, many Sikhs have earned name and fame in entertainment world without compromising on their hair.
Good examples may be Jaspal Bhatti, Navjot Singh Sidhu.
The only problem is you are indecisive which is causing you pain. Once you're sure what you want to be and how you want to look , things will be a lot easier.
My other view is that running away from things is not the solution. Is there a guarantee that you'll succeed in your career if you cut your hair.
Think about it. But make a decision and never look back. Be firm on whatever you decide.
Cheers

Answer 4

Inder

If it’s the right girl for you, it won't matter how you look. It’s a different story if you want to flirt around with many girls who are shallow enough to reject anybody who looks different.

Also when it comes to looks, where is the world going? Everybody is following what the british/french/europeans started when they colonized most of the world in eth 18th century. Nobody used to cut his or her hair before that. They not only colonized the different lands physically, but also culturally. Cutting hair is the cultural/fashion "GIFT??" given by these firangis. As a matter of fact, when I see pictures of great-grandfathers of my American friends, they looked as if they are modern world Sikhs (Just the turban missing). None of them had their beards cut because they were not affected by the fashion industry yet.

I feel proud that we Sikhs still carry the burden of saving our old traditions when everybody else feels rather happy to be assimilated into this mindless crowd of followers of the world around them.

I am also proud that our prophets gave every Sikh the choice to become a Sikh. Nobody in Sikhism gets baptized and introduced into the Sikh religion when they are born (unlike most of other religions). They get baptized only when they are old enough to understand the religion and follow it. It is a conscious decision/choice that a person makes to become a Sikh.

So hang in there brother, be the one to stand out and be unique. Be a MAN and not a BOY. Don't go after the GIRLS, go for a WOMAN who has the guts/brains/heart to see what lies beneath.

Answer 5

If all you're interested in are girls, then you're not really following the traditions. I dont see how you figure that girls are the source of happiness, but whatever. See what you really want, your hair or girls, and then pursue that no matter what anyone else says. And dont forget, you can find a girl that likes you and your respect for your traditions. If these girls dont like you AND your traditions, then they're superficial and not worth your time.

Answer 6

Hi Inder. Balvin here. I'm a sikh myself. Coincidentally i am also 18. In my opinion turban guys r cute. So do not feel ashamed of yourself. Anyway what's da point of having a girlfren if she don't like u da way u r. Even i am facing a similiar problem like yours.My mom wants me 2 keep long hair which i don't really like.But thank god my hair is not dat long.Ithink u should keep ur hair. I wud like 2 know u better. Do mail me at belvin_corr @yahoo.com.Juz relax kay.

Answer 7

expensive pal, In India, for a woman it rather is okay. although, the boy might desire to be 21. What approximately your u . s . a . of beginning place ? the respond relies upon on the country terrific of wonderful fortune thank you, heat Regards & might GOD Bless G Senthil Iyappan

Answer 8

If you're 18, you can choose what you want to do with your hair. What kind of tradition are you following?

Answer 9

BE PATIENCE