My friend is 27 yrs. old, & she's dating a 42-yr. old man who has 4 kids. The man's oldest daughter is 24 yrs. old, & she so-claims not to want a step-mother who is only 3 yrs. older than her, so she starts lies to her dad about my friend, & my friend is very sad about it, & she really loves this man. He's the only man who has been good to my friend, & they are willing to stick together & be faithful to each other. My friend has dealt with abusive & manipulative men around her age, & now, here's 1 GOOD man, way older than her who really cares for her. Should his daughter mind her own business, or does she have a right to be mad?
My friend is crying & worried & very sad. How can I talk to her, help her, & cheer her up?
2006-09-01 13:59:31 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
well first of all his daughter should stay out of her dads love life so to speak. he will be living his life the way he sees fit & if he makes your friend happy than so be it. his daughter is just causing problems for your friend so that her dad & your friend will become enimies is all. tell your friend to tell her that shes just being inmature that she needs to get a life & get over it that she will not cause problems no matter how much she tries. if all fells if i was your friend i would let her have it but good i would try to gather up some dirt on her so that her dad would be displeased with her & i know thats wrong but hey she needs a good taste of her own medicine serves her right for interfering in her dads life. {good luck}
2006-09-01 14:24:38 · answer #1 · answered by lil_bit_nv 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well the first thing she should do is talk to the daughter and find out what she is really feeling. Remember she is not just being a part of his life she will be a part of his kids lives too. And if his daugter really cared about her father and sees that he is happy then she would accept your friend with open arms because she does make him happy. This is something that she will have to work on and do not give up just because his daughter does not like you, be strong and fight for your happiness!!!!!!!!!
2006-09-01 21:56:10 · answer #2 · answered by twinki 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WELL if it was YOUR dad would you like your friend to date him, i dont think so, that is what his daughter is thinking, she dosent want her dad to get hurt & be made a fool of, he is 15 years older than her, what happens when he is a lot older & shes only young, she would then be living a life like a pensioner, but if she feels she can cope with the age difference then she should talk to his daughter & explain, that even though she is younger she is the type of woman who likes older men, in her case she loves her dad, she dosent want to take him away from her just to share him with her, & be happy, if she truely loves him then it will work out for her, good luck to you both,
2006-09-01 21:13:42 · answer #3 · answered by KATIEKAT 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, this will not be easy for your friend. She's got a long hard road ahead of her if she wants to be with this man.
You're friend needs to ask herself these questions:
Does she want to have children of her own?
Because this man may be in a different stage of life than her. He's already had a family, and she's probably going to want one of her own. She needs to do the math and figure out if this is something she AND he can handle.
Does this guy want to marry her?
Again, this guy may be in a different place than her. Many divorcee's don't want to be married again. So she needs to determine if this is important to her.
Will this guy favor his daughters side, or her side???
This is a tricky question, because there is no simple answer or conclusion. If he chooses her side, then he is the type of guy that would betray his daughter, and maybe wouldn't be sensitive to her feelings. If he chooses his daughter's side, then he is the type of guy that she won't be able to trust to always stand by her side.
I don't envy her.
2006-09-01 21:13:26 · answer #4 · answered by Chellebelle78 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Things have a way of working out. Your friend should really have a talk with his daughter and tell her how she feels about her dad and her. This daughter has a right to be upset. It affects her life as well. They need to communicate all that they are feeling to one another. You just be there to support your friend. Listen to her and let her know things will work out for the best. They can't be forced.
2006-09-01 21:06:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you know the man? Maybe you could talk to him nicely about what his daughter is doing. How does she know the man's daughter is lying to her Dad? Has the man said something to your friend? If so, she should tell the man that the stories are lies and what she thinks is motivating his daughter. Nicely.
2006-09-01 21:15:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Help her understand what the daughter is doing is being jealous and that my friend is a girl thing. Age difference is not the issue it is how the father/lover takes the stress.
To help your friend is just listen and tell her how special she is to her many friends and what ever she decides to do you are behind her all the way.
Go places she wants to go and just listen The best friend is the one who listens and does not judge.
2006-09-01 21:07:46 · answer #7 · answered by aaricka 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The daughter should be HAPPY that her Dad has someone who cares about him! She's also way too old to be having a temper tantrum! She should be ashamed of herself. This is not a problem for your friend to deal with. This is for her boyfriend. It's his daughter that's the problem. He needs to set her straight!
Good Luck to your friend. I wish her peace and happiness!
2006-09-01 21:09:49 · answer #8 · answered by clueless 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the daughter has no right to diapprove their relationship. no one can stop the way other feels and think. your friend's relationship is ideal to both of them, then the daughter should realize that and support the happiness of her father. tell your friend to make friends with the daughter and show her that age really doesnt matter. and make hersself the right one for her lover, so other may also think that she is the right one for him....
2006-09-01 21:17:24 · answer #9 · answered by `red 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my cousin married a man whose youngest child was the same age as her , it was a long hard road for them from both of their families , but now everyone gets along fine. if they truly love each other it will work out
2006-09-01 21:04:25 · answer #10 · answered by sindi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋