If you are in a committed relationship than wouldn't that define your sexuality one way or the other? Just curious.
2006-09-01 11:07:56 · 19 answers · asked by Gorgeoustxwoman2013 7 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I am a straight woman. By some of the answers I am getting the feeling that the attraction to both is the answer. I can appreciate a beautiful woman when I see her. I don't have any desire for her except maybe I wish I looked like Scarlett Johanson. I hope I spelled her name correctly, I don't think I did.
2006-09-01 11:26:26 · update #1
So attraction is then much different than appreciation.
2006-09-01 11:27:50 · update #2
Bisexuality isn't about having sex with members of the opposite sex. It's about being sexually attracted to members of both sexes. Saying that a bisexual person has to pick a side of the fence to commit to a relationship is a bit ignorant. Unfortunatley it's a fairly common ignorance.
Just because a bisexual person is in a commited relationship with a member of the same sex, doesn't suddenly make them gay. If things don't work out, and they end up with someone of the opposite sex, they aren't suddenly straight.
A person is bisexual if they feel they are. There's no rules about who can call themselves bisexual, gay, straight or anything. If a straight man once had sex with another man, that doens't mean he's bi or gay, nor does a gay man having sex with a woman suddenly mean he's bi or striaght. Sex is sex, and it only makes up one part of a persons sexuality.
This is the problem with labels like gay, straight, bi and all the rest. I call myself gay, but there's a chance I might have sex with a woman one day. An extremely remote chance, and not something I plan on or want at this point of my life. It could happen though. I'm still gay, because I choose to call myself gay.
If someone says they are bi, and are in a committed relationship, don't try to force them to pick that "side of the fence". It's ignorant and rude.
2006-09-01 11:27:11 · answer #1 · answered by Shaun B 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Being bisexual means you are sexually attraced to both men and women. If you choose one and are in a committed relationship, that doesn't mean you're not bisexual, it just means you've found one person you want to commit to and usually people are only one gender.
Looking at things from another perspective, my very good friend (a man) has been in a committed relationship with a bisexual woman for eight years and just married her. They have been "swinging" and having threesomes for their entire relationship and plan to continue while married. I have a feeling this wouldn't work for many people, but it works for them. They clearly are completely in love and would not want to be married to anybody but each other. So, I don't judge. Is that what you define as a committed relationship, though? That's another question...
2006-09-01 14:42:26 · answer #2 · answered by τεκνον θεου 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, bisexual, by the very definition defines a sexual preference, and in this case there really isn't one.
Commited relationships should NEVER be based on sex, and therefore, it doesn't really factor in. You should find someone you genuinely care for, and enjoy being around, and the intimacy in the relationship should be secondary.
So to put it rather simply, being bisexual means you're willing to have sex with either males or females, but not necessarily all at once.
2006-09-01 11:17:31 · answer #3 · answered by MysticTortoise 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like both men and women.
I like men and women of all races.
I'm attracted to men with longer hair and men with shaved heads.
I'm attracted to highly femme and slightly butch women.
No one ever has anything they want all of the time. It is just impossible. I've been with a woman for two years, and I am still 100% bisexual. We're incredibly committed (not monogamous however) and we're talking about having kids when I'm done with grad school in two years. Just because you might additionally like, enjoy, appreciate, or fantasize about something else doesn't mean that you can't be incredibly happy with what you have.
2006-09-01 13:07:03 · answer #4 · answered by dani_kin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, being in a committed relationship doesn't define your sexuality. And you can be in a committed relationship no matter what your sexuality. Heterosexuals can be in a committed relationship with someone of the opposite sex & still find others of the opposite sex to be sexually attractive yet they don't have sex with everyone they are sexually attracted to. The same can be true of gays or lesbians, except for the fact that those they are sexually attrcted to are of their same sex rathe than the opposite sex. Bisexuals can be in a committed relationship with someone of either sex and not have sex with anyone else even though they are attracted to other people of both sexes. They may have had sex with people of both sexes at one time or another, but being in a commited relationship with one person they don't have sex with anyone but that person. You are the one who defines your sexuality (and it's not necessarily the same as it appears to someone else).
2006-09-01 14:23:22 · answer #5 · answered by Dragon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By my acknowledging my bisexuality, I also acknowledge my capacity to love, exclusively, one man or one woman.
Bisexuality in no way limits my capacity to form and maintain a monogamous relationship. Bisexuality, as I experience it, is an expansion to love.
Also, many bisexuals choose to form a committed polyamous relationship with three people. These three are exclusive with each other, having no sexual contact outside of themselves. This does not mean they are in a sexual threesome, however. Two of them may be bisexual while the third either hetero- or homosexual, and they choose to be sexual only in pairs.
Again, bisexuality never rules out the choice to be monogamous.
2006-09-01 11:24:38 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Speaking as a NON bisexual person (I only state this because I cannot answer completely accurately since I am not bisexual.)
Bisexuality is the attraction to both sexes. Once you find someone you love, that's who you stay with - you are still attracted to other people (everybody is, including high monogomous people) but that doesn't mean you are not faithful/committed to your relation.
2006-09-01 11:17:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No. Does being heterosexual rule out having a committed relationship? Just because you have a wide variety to choose from doesn't mean you can't settle on just one, nor does the fact that you are committed mean that you aren't attracted to others, you just don't persue that attraction.
2006-09-01 12:12:41 · answer #8 · answered by IndyT- For Da Ben Dan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not necessarily. You can be bi-sexual and not actively done it with the same or opposit sex in a few years, because you are in a relationship. You are still attracted to both sexes at the same time
2006-09-01 11:22:54 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm Bi and I'm married and I decided a long time ago to try to be what was expected of me and now even though I love the person I'm with I still wished I lived my life the way I wanted too but I feel it's too late for me. So yes I'm Bi
2006-09-01 11:31:30 · answer #10 · answered by Super 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋