I've been with my husband for over four years. We've been married for almost one year. When we first met, I was very overweight. A year ago, I lost 126 pounds and look completely different. I do have to say that I look fantastic now! My problem is that I get hit on constantly. And no, I'm not trying to be conceited! I'm not used to all this attention. I get hit on by strangers, the men that I work with, the customers. I just don't know what to do or how to react because I've never had this before. I'm used to being "that invisible fat girl". I love my husband with all of my heart and soul. How do I fend off these men? They don't even care that I have a wedding ring on! I'm really getting aggravated.
2006-09-01 08:24:16 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I have had a similar problem. And it is not concieted to know you look good after fighting to lose that much weight. Right on for you girl!
When a guy approaches you make it into a bit of a joke, when a guy asks for your phone number, tell him that you don't know it, but he can definately get it from your husband. If a guy asks you out tell him that your husband never lets you date strange men without them talknig to him first.
Have a sense of humor, enjoy your new beauty and remember the main point when dealing with this situation:
BOYS ARE DUMB!!!!!
2006-09-01 08:29:07 · answer #1 · answered by Sarah H 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If they're direct in asking you out - you can be just as direct in telling them you're married, and not interested. This should fend of any reasonable person. If you mean they're just flirting with you more, but not necessarily asking you out - you can either feign ignorance and carry on as usual, as if they weren't flirting; you use your sense of humor and turn it into a joke; if appropriate, you can politely end the conversation and walk away. Most guys don't mean harm when they flirt with you, and are not trying to take you away from your husband. For those few that are persistent and don't take "no" for an answer there are restraining orders and the police - but I'm sure in most cases simply being good-natured but indifferent about it will send them a message that you're not interested.
Good for you for losing all this weight, that's awesome.
2006-09-01 15:53:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How do u "fend them off"? Ummm, try saying "NO THANK YOU" and move on. Unless they rape you on the spot then what is the problem here? Why is this even a question? Is it such a problem to have guys plague u everywhere u go? When you were fat this is what u wished for every day I bet. Enjoy it while u r hot and get over it!
2006-09-01 17:23:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's called "ignore them"........If they can't respect you enough to stop talking to you after you told them you were married, you don't need to be fooling with them. WALK AWAY!!! If they call you stuck up or whatever, don't let it get to you, because you know that you aren't those things. You don't want to messed up your marriage, do you??? You look great for your husband, and your husband only. If he's not giving you that same attention these other guys are, you need to let your husband know what he's not doing.
Don't stress over mess! Congrats on the weight lose!
God Bless
2006-09-01 16:22:55 · answer #4 · answered by jcdunbar0312 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just ignore them all together. You shouldnt have to ask, when you know you're being hit on, it's not that hard to polietly say you arent interested and that you're married. If they dont back off, they're losers anyway, even though that doesnt matter because you are happily married.
2006-09-01 15:28:23 · answer #5 · answered by rdnkchic2003 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HOW??? Come on. Are we to believe this???? OK. Stranger? "I'm married." Customer? "I'm married." Co-worker? "I'm married, knock it off or face sexual harassment charges." Lady, perhaps you're acting as though you think you are hot stuff. I have a difficult time believing ALL these guys hit on you, without SOMETHING to encourage them. Are you dressing to show off your "fantastic" looks? There IS something besides just losing weight that has turned alllll the guys in your area to chase after you like you a pack of wolves.
2006-09-01 15:41:23 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, I don't know how to tell you to react, you'll have to get a woman's help there. But, wow! Congrats on the weight loss. That is awesome. That shows some serious discipline and determination. Enjoy the attention.
2006-09-01 15:29:29 · answer #7 · answered by bawinmmfs 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm with the one girl who suggested having a sense of humor about it. I usually just smile and tell them something like, "Thanks but I don't think my husband would approve." Or "I don't know; let me go ask my husband what he thinks." Cause if they can't see the ring or worse yet don't care, they're asking for a dumb-*** answer like that. lol
Congrats on losing all the weight!! I agree that it's not conceited at all. Walk tall and proud, honey!
2006-09-01 15:38:39 · answer #8 · answered by I'm just me 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
My wife gets hit on constantly, whether I'm with her or not.
A great response from the husband: Go ahead pal! She comes with 4 kids & a mortgage!
2006-09-01 16:24:27 · answer #9 · answered by hellsbells 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
good for you girl , congrats on losing all that weight, i my self am trying to lose a few pounds myself , but i still get hit on too and im happily married , im 30 and i look like im a 22 y/o still , i get card for cigs and beer ! anyways enjoy the complaments but if someone takes it to far then go get help ! because things can turn ugly at times . like the last poster said got have a great sence of humor !
2006-09-01 15:53:25 · answer #10 · answered by Bella 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋