Tell me that I will be happy without my, beer drinking, pot smoking dishonost boyfriend. Every morning I am all ready to never see him again, and by the end of my work hours, he is all I can think about. He is not violent, and he always tells me how much he loves me, and how he is so glad that I am in his life, and how much he needs me. He works really hard and he is good to people. But, I have caught him in two big lies and do not think the drinking and pot smoking are going to stop. I know I need to leave, but every afternoon , I find myself back with him. I have had thoughts of leaving him for about eight months now. I know that I should know better. I feel caught. I really care about him and enjoy being with him, but I know he has BIG issues. Help me please.
2006-09-01 06:32:49 · 10 answers · asked by gofigure 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Honey, I've been in recovery for nearly 21 years, I can tell you for a fact a dope smoking, beer drinking liar is the lowest of the low. He will tell you one thing and do another to keep his supply chain active. NOTHING is worth peace of mind.
Leave him and don't look back, go into counseling so you don't pick another loser in the future.
Hit an alanon meeting for support. Best of luck.
SOBERINAA!!
2006-09-01 06:38:50 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Imagine how your life will be if u marry a beer drinking,pot smoking dishonest boyfriend. I've never had a boyfriend like that but i was in a similar situation with a boyfriend i cant quit. i will say im ready to break up with him and i even told him i need some time away from him but the moment he calls....i was just ecstatic and i was back...where i was before. How did i got out of that relationship....i tried...to ignore his calls.....i even cried as i feel that my life was so empty without him....but time heals everything.....and it wasnt the end of the world.....love can be very confusing and frustrating sometimes...but u have to weigh the pros and cons of the relationship.....i feel that u know that the relationship is wrong....u are just too attached to him to leave.....i was planning to suggest u to ask him to give up his vice but....that would be useless....because if he actually say yes he will change....with him being dishonest....how will u know if he actually did change......
2006-09-01 13:48:38 · answer #2 · answered by ♦cat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its hard leaving people you love. I know this. But maybe if you leave him and give him time on his own he will realize what he has lost and change. Drinking and smoking pot are not easy habbits to break, but it can be done. Maybe if he sees he is losing you those things will not be as important to him anymore. And if he doesn't, you know there was no hope, and at least you go out of the situation. If you keep yourself occupied, and plan things for yourself to do, slowly , the thought of him will leave and you will one day find yourself happy again. good luck.
2006-09-01 13:42:01 · answer #3 · answered by jam_psb 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are probably the type of person who does not like change.. & the thought of change scares you... your boyfriend is a big LOSER.. all his bad habits will only get worse and may lead into something illegal.. If you are not happy how things are going in your life then its up to you to change it.. no one is going to make the change for you.. you need to take a deep breath pack your things and leave.. change is good for everyone.. you just may even find a more suitable boyfriend.. good luck & God Bless
2006-09-01 16:30:31 · answer #4 · answered by cinsaint1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is the drinking and the smoking causing problems at work? Is he stealing to support his habit? are his bills going lacking because of this habit? If he is not causing any harm to the home or you, then what is the reason to complain... if you have lights, your car is not in jeopardy of being taken, your house is not in foreclose... then leave him be.... he will leave it alone sooner or later... or is that something you don;t like? listen this man really loves you sounds like.. everyone has a flaw that someone has to deal with.... Maybe he smokes and drinks because of stress.. have you tried to talk to him to see what is going on in his life for him to be doing these things?
2006-09-01 13:40:13 · answer #5 · answered by Shonda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u take out all those things that u know arent healthy for u. u havta fill them in with good things, so ur not left with doing nothng and wanting to go back to the old. find new friends, church and community get togethers are great ways. fill ur time with things u LOVE to do, not just stuff that takes up time. u will be great, dun worry
2006-09-01 13:37:02 · answer #6 · answered by Sheila 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have given plenty of reasons to at least take "time off" from your boyfriend: 1) possible addiction to drug/acohol, 2) lying, 3)his words of love and devotion to you do not jive w/his actions, 4) trust issues,etc. You will be fine w/ou him--if it comes to that. Perhaps if he truly loves you, you can tell him that you want him to get counseling w/you. Good luck!
2006-09-01 13:42:21 · answer #7 · answered by hopscothchbunnies 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
gurl , juz leave him... if he really loves you like you said and he really does, he would realize how important you are to him.. and maybe he would be able to give up some things for you. its a risk to take actually, but either way there is an advantage, if he begs you to come back, you can bargain for his change
if he doesnt, you saved yourself from a devastating relationship....
Good luck
2006-09-01 14:30:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh girl u are ruining your life... truly. a guy like that dosen't change and in fact it'll probably only get worse and he'll end up dragging you down with him. get rid of him and get a dog.
2006-09-01 13:37:31 · answer #9 · answered by Vol_Fan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yo you need to be talking to him and not on the internet talking to people you don't know about it. When you get home today? talk to him!
2006-09-01 13:42:41 · answer #10 · answered by W R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋