Wouldn't it get boring making love to the same person for years? It is like eating your favorite food, you would get bored of it if eaten every day. There are only so many ways to express ingenuity with the same person in the bedroom arena. Is swinging wrong or is their some benefit to the marriage if both partners mutually agree to it? I am not looking for religious responses. I am looking for logical responses.
2006-09-01 04:11:11 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Its called true love and committment.
2006-09-01 04:13:18 · answer #1 · answered by nanny2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it really depends on the relationship you have with your partner. I personally don't see anything wrong with swinging if both partners agree and it's something you do to enhance your marriage and sex life. I've been married 10 years and trust me, there aren't enough positions or toys to keep me excited all the time and it can get kinda boring! My husband is a very jealous person so he couldn't handle the whole swinging thing (unfortunate for me) but has no problem with me bringing another girl home. I wouldn't oppose that situation but it doesn't work both ways.......he won't let me bring a guy home......so why should I let him have all the fun!! I think you have to be very open sexually and mentally and truly love the person in order to not be tempted by the thought of cheating. It's not easy!!!!!
2006-09-01 11:32:09 · answer #2 · answered by naughtyflirt 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been married for 7 years and we have been together for 15. Marriage isn't JUST about sex, and that's what keeps it interesting. The fact that we enjoy being together, raising our kids, working at our business... If it was just great in bed, I would still not be a satisfied woman. I'm still not bored and don't expect to ever get bored.
Everybody is different though. I personally don't understand how swinging is appealing, but each to his own. It wouldn't work for me, call me insecure, old-fashioned, whatever. I'm happy with my husband and, as others have said, just cause you're married doesn't mean all the romance is gone or you get into a rut. In fact, being with someone for a long time means you are comfortable enough to do things together later in life you might not have done in the beginning. I
also don't believe I would ever cheat on my husband. If things start to get stale, we are the ones who have to work it out together, so it gets back on track, no third parties needed. Someone else mentioned commitment and if you're committed, you work things out (I'm talking about BEFORE anyone in the marriage has cheated, after an affair, well, I wouldn't know how to address that, I don't think I could forgive my husband, but then again, I love him so much that I might. Just thinking about it makes me feel sick though)
2006-09-01 11:57:38 · answer #3 · answered by friendlyshoulder 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My wife and I have been swinging for several years, and contrary to popular belief, we didn't start swinging because we were bored with each other. In fact quite the opposite. Our sex life was already great, even after being together almost six years. We started swinging because we were comfortable with, and trusted each other enough to express our fantasies without fear the other one would be angry or offended. Swinging has allowed us to fulfill fantasies about threesomes and moresomes.
Has our marriage gotten better since we started swinging. Yes. But not just because of the sex. But because we moved to a whole new level of communication and trust with each other. We removed jealousy from the relationship equation and with that gone the relationship is as easy as breathing. We can talk to, and express to each other anything and everything.
Now do I think everyone should do it? No. Swinging will not fix a marriage with problems, in fact it will worsen the problems. The relationship has to be very strong to swing successfully. Swinging should be used to broaden your sexual horizons, not because you're bored with your partner. Those people never last in the Lifestyle and rarely last in thier marriage.
2006-09-02 15:41:43 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why is it that you have the same parents all your life and you don't get bored with them? When was the last time you looked at another older couple and thought, 'Wow! I'd be willing to trade my parents love and feelings for a few moments of having that couple be my parents!' When was the last time that you flaunted something in front of your parents, or did something behind their backs, that you knew would directly hurt them?
The reason some people stay together for years and not cheat is because the LOVE, and RESPECT the person they're with and think, feel, and believe that other person is the most important member of their family.
Focus on that, and the fact that she's willing to put up with you, and you might start to find appreciation in your relationship, instead of boredom.
2006-09-01 11:59:37 · answer #5 · answered by IAINTELLEN 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it doesn't get boring. Eating your favorite food and making love are not a good comparison.
It is like your asking. You have children but how can you care about them for the rest of your life.
When you find your love of your life and really do love each other. There is nothing boring to it at all. As your love grows stronger which it should you will see that being away just for work is to long. You will want to be with him or her for as many minutes as possible. True love is something that grows and because more beautiful as you both move through life.
2006-09-01 11:29:42 · answer #6 · answered by Mit 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think, even if both partners agree to swinging, it can destroy a relationship. It could cause an enormous amount of jealousy. I mean - I might be OK with my husband sleeping with another woman, IF she disappeared off the face of the earth immediately after. But if I knew he'd been with somebody and we saw her a lot I'd always wonder "does he like her better than me? Is he going to leave me for her? Is she sexier than me?"
Third parties can do a lot of damage to a relationship. You're not just bringing sex into it, you're bringing in a whole other person with thoughts and a will of their own.
2006-09-01 11:31:47 · answer #7 · answered by farmgirl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Aren't you confident enough in YOUR abilities to keep a spouse sexually fulfilled for life? If you can use your imagination, you would discover that you can actually have married sex outside of the bedroom! There is always the kitchen counter, bathroom sink (perfect heigth by the way), add 4 handicap grip bars to your shower (one for each arm and leg). Wow that one is the best ever! There is the beach, the car, and yes on the motorcycle. Life is full of adventure, if you are truly in love with someone, you won't get bored.
2006-09-01 11:28:26 · answer #8 · answered by ps 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
4 me marriage is commitment,contract. will or what's related to it. Makin luv u mean sex? IT is almost 80% of marriage 2 me.
BENEFITS. wow.Its unrated.
1 fine di we will b old & useless.
1 fine di we will b sick & weak.
1 fine di we will b alone & lost.
1 fine di we will b what we want 2 b.
1 fine di we die,
SWINGING. It is a test 2 marriage life.
Pass or Fail. Ur call.
Both partners must know marriage rule.
Then why get married but can't keep it?
2006-09-01 12:37:41 · answer #9 · answered by myid 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They were ready to get married in the first place and they got married for the right reasons. I was married to my first husband for 25 years. Neither one of us cheated on each other. We were satisfied with each other. You just have to be committed to what you are doing. Take the vow's seriously or don't take them. Yes swinging is wrong. Marriage is a commitment not a convenience. If you want different partners then u weren't ready for marriage anyway.
2006-09-01 11:24:03 · answer #10 · answered by Vic 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i was in a 8 year marriage WE DID SWING in the end he still found it necessary to cheat! even thou i allowed him to sleep with women WHEN I KNEW ABOUT IT he started dating women and lying to me about them. Anyway the swinging kept us together longer then we would have if the relationship was totally committed only to each other. Now I'm married we don't swing BUT we do go to swing clubs we watch we hang out but, we don't ever get sexually involved with anyone else. This is by both our choice if and when and time comes that we decide to swing we might "we did when we 1st married". For now we just do other things to keep the interest we buy toys porn go to the swing clubs exc.
2006-09-01 11:29:09 · answer #11 · answered by ally'smom 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋