Im an american and my husband is brit and we been together 2 years ,got married 3 months ago and we have a 5 month old baby girl.Hes been living in america for 3 years because of a work contract but that contract will be up next month.He says hes saved some money so now he wants 2 move back to his homeland ,the uk,with me and the baby of course.Im looking foward to it,but go a call from him this morning telling me he got offered a job in the middle east and hes thinking about taking it and he wants to move me back with the baby to the uk ,he has his own house but his mother lives there.Ive only been to the uk once.It scary to think that I have to move to country Ive never lived in before and settle by myself with a baby and leave my family behind 2000 miles.Ive suggested that I can stay with my family for a while here in america but he doesnt want to.Plus the fact I dont believe in long distance relationships,some friends of ours or getting divorced cause of it.Is he being selfish?
2006-09-01 03:16:12 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Not only inconsiderate but selfish as well... when did 'you' (as a couple) decide that he should take these other jobs? Did 'you' (as a couple) discuss this issues?
If you feel you don't want to go, you shouldn't and if you don't want him to take this job in the Middle East, you should tell him so.
2006-09-01 04:44:51 · answer #1 · answered by E. Gads 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You two need to talk. Everyone is a little selfish, but in a relationship, it's important that decisions are made with everyone's awareness and consideration. If he has no interest in your concerns and will simply tell you all decisions, that's a problem. It's also a problem if that's already how you and your husband make decisions.
Tell him what you're thinking and try to work out a long-term plan that will keep both of you reasonably OK. If you don't both work on this together, you'll set the stage for problems at one point or another.
Lastly, some long distance relationships work and some don't. It depends on the people--their personalities and how much they care for each other--more than the distance.
2006-09-01 03:23:20 · answer #2 · answered by Stuck in the Middle Ages 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i definetely think he is being selfish.you poor thing with all the violence in the middle east you must be so worried.your husband should really put himself in your shoes cause he is asking alot.having to settle in with the baby is crazy.a new country,an in-law(u know how that goes),plus worrying about his safety.we didnt even hit your own wants and needs.your husband needs help----so here it is.
to the husband of this woman.dont b so inconsiderate.let her stay in america while u run off to fight arabs or whatever!she should not(not!)have to live in your country and youre not even there.what nerve.iron maiden would be highly dissapointed in you sir.dont do that to your wife.shes scared for u,herself,and of course the baby.do the right thing and either work in uk near home or leave ya wife in the good 'ol u -s -of a
lady,let him read this-he needs to hear it from someone
2006-09-01 03:24:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
VERY!!
Stay here in the US with your family. Dont go to Europe alone with your baby.
You are safer here.
He would be very selfish for accepting a job in the mid east and leaving you and the baby.
Tell him you feel more comfortable staying here.
You wont know anyone there!
Good luck hon
2006-09-01 03:27:54 · answer #4 · answered by Deb 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I would say so. If it was me I would tell him I was not going to move. You need to stand up for yourself. Its not fair for you to have to move that far away from the only place you've ever known with a new baby on top of that. I think your husband should try to switch position with you and then maybe he would come to his senses. Good Luck
2006-09-01 03:27:07 · answer #5 · answered by flutterby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOOK JUST TELL THAT YOU WILL STAY HERE UNTIL HIS JOB CONTRACT IS UP IN THE MID EAST. ONCE THAT'S DONE YOU CAN MOVE ON TO THE UK AND START YOUR FAMILY. RIGHT NOW IT'S JUST FAIR ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU'RE LEAVING YOUR FAMILY BEHIND & AND WILL HAVE NO ONE THERE ECEPT HIS FAMILY. THATS JUST PLAIN SCARY!
2006-09-01 03:33:55 · answer #6 · answered by Wisline F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he is being inconsiderate.....
the both of you need to sit down and talk about this....
apparently he's making all the decisions in this relationship. Since he's not gonna be with you anyways, it's makes sense to stay where you're comfortable.
2006-09-01 03:24:25 · answer #7 · answered by Purrr 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldnt move over there personally because u wll be alone in a country you dont know.I would stay right where u are with your family and raise your baby.
2006-09-01 03:23:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell me no your going to stay here and when he finishes with the job you and him and the baby will move to the uk until then no your staying here why should you go there and he isnt going to be there why should you have to live with his mom no way stand your ground and hopefully he will understand
2006-09-01 03:21:53 · answer #9 · answered by teresa d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stay close to your husband and go with him to middle east where he got his new contract .
2006-09-01 03:33:43 · answer #10 · answered by MIKE IVANA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋