ok, my finance and i have arguments over money. i try my best to get him to understand that in order to get ahead we need to watch our spending. (we make between us about $3,500 a month). we need to save, and not spend every dollar every week. he doesnt understand, and doesnt think this will get us anywhere. its so fustrating, i dont want money to ruin us. on the other hand, he plays online poker, for money. he will put money online, and 9 out of ten times he wins big. (big to me is like putting 100$ online and winnning like 1000$). now he doesnt understand when to STOP and cash the money out so we can use it. he keeps playing trying to win more, and always ends up loosing it all! today when i left for work he had 982$ online, and when i got home he had 00.25$ online (25 cents!!!). he blew it all. if he wants to get ahead on bills and all, he needs to learn when to stop online and cashout. someone help me explain this to him and just help me in general, i dont know what to do anymore!!
2006-08-31 16:55:06 · 7 answers · asked by Lisa 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
i do love him. he is my world. i have never in my life been so happy. its still like the first day we say eachother. i am sure if he can seem to get over this fckin gambling stuff we'll be fine, but you gotta jump the hurdle to win the race.... i just dont know how hard its gunna be, or if its even possible.
2006-08-31 17:16:11 · update #1
It sounds like he's a bit addicted to playing poker. Maybe you should get him some help. If not...why don't you make a deal w/ him. Say...several nights a week when he's got the money at a decent level...make him cash out and then the other two or three nights a week let him lose. That way, he'll see that when he actually cashes out, he gets **** done instead of wasting your and his money and time.
2006-08-31 16:58:02 · answer #1 · answered by lil_af_wife05 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If he's not losing money, it's not a problem-- at least to him. Trying to "fix" him will only alienate him more. Sounds like the thing you and your fiance really have a problem with is where he is placing his priorities, not the fact that he's gambling. Your fiance might try having a non-judgmental conversation with him, where he expresses his real concern-- sadness that he doesn't get to spend more time with his dad. Maybe you and your fiance could take the first step-- share his interests by having a poker night with him!
2016-03-17 05:54:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless he wants to help himself, there's no way you can make him stop.
You have to be firm with him with regards to gambling with money that is needed for monthly expenses. He must agree with you that whatever he gambles with, has to be spare cash, after putting aside savings for a rainy day.
He must realize that over time, no one can beat a machine, as they are programmed with an advantage over the player/gambler. He must engage himself with Gamblers' Anonymous, to help himself from going deeper. Its an addiction which is bottomless!
2006-08-31 17:25:19 · answer #3 · answered by G.T. L 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That's got to be totally fustrating.....you need to seriously re-evaluate whether he is the right guy to marry. You won't get much sympathy after you're married if you knew of his gambling problem and poor financial spending habits before hand.
Chooseyour partner wisely cause it's for life.
2006-08-31 17:12:18 · answer #4 · answered by Tony 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your husband has a gambling problem that is going to get worse before it gets better. Find out about Gamblers Anonymous and insist he get some help before he ruins you.
2006-08-31 17:05:46 · answer #5 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
1-800-gambler..... maybe they can help!
It's scary going into a marriage with $ problems before your married!
One of my aunts had the same problem with my uncle! she got fed up with it for all the right reasons ; ( One day she decided to take him on a carousel ride and explain to him that his betting better stop and these were the only horses he could bet on if he wanted to stay married to her! It worked !!!!!
I don't know what else to say but you have serious thinking to do....your future depends on it......your not married yet....best of luck!
2006-08-31 17:07:05 · answer #6 · answered by magdalina 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ok this is is so simple... I know you only want whats best for you two...Until you get your point across...expect the worse and hope for the best...but when it comes down to this...threaten to leave him
2006-08-31 17:44:15 · answer #7 · answered by 2Luâ?¥2Ha8 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
there are gamblers anonymous, look for a local support group and send his butt over.
2006-08-31 16:57:15 · answer #8 · answered by pay 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋