Have you suffered a great loss? How have you overcome?

Question

I'd like to know how people have gotten threw after having lost something that dear to them!

When I say great loss I do just mean people I mean like your home, your dog, whatever! I want to know how you got over something devistating! Life changing!

Answer 1

i had a miscarriage and then had to have an emergency hysterectomy. meanwhile the man that i was living with slept with my best friend in my bed while i was in the hospital. i think that i was more upset with her than i was with him because she was supposed to have been my best friend. we were closer than sisters for 30 years and she did that to me. it sure took the wind out of my sails, let me tell ya.

it didnt help that when i left him, within a year, 12 people that i was close to died. 1 would have been bad enough, but 12. that took years to get over.

my dad died while i was pregnant with my youngest daughter. my mother died last year. that was pretty hard to take because my sister swooped in and tried to take everything. instead of fighting her, i let her have it. she knows that it doesnt rightfully belong to her and she can live with it.

in the case of my ex best friend, i know that she is not happy. i dont want to be her friend anymore (she actually had the nerve to try to come back and be a friend after her and my ex split up). she can deal with that because i was the one she could count on. she looks like hell now. even her own kids dont trust her now. she isnt allowed to spend time with her grandkids. (i can).

with my dad and mom, it was rough. but the fighting with my sister was an ordeal not to be repeated. mother died of cancer in her own home. hospice was great to all of us. they have a ceremony once a year ending in tying your persons name on a balloon and letting it go free. when we let ours go, my daughters and neice had tied theirs on with mine. our balloon got stuck on a tree branch and just stayed there for a long time. like it was watching us to see what we were going to do. when my great nephew started to climb the tree to get them, they then flew away. i think that helped me start to get over mother being gone.

when you loose someone that you are close to, sometimes you use the other thing to take the place of the someone that you have lost. i did that with my dog. last week, he disappeared and it was like loosing everybody and everything all over again.

it takes a lot of time and you will miss them all your life. but as time goes on, you remember more of the good things and less of the bad. you go on whether you realize it or not.

i still have bad days and good days. i get depressed sometimes but i think of what my mother went through with the cancer and i dont wish that on anybody. thank god for hospice. they also have grief counselors that you can talk to anytime. they are great.

Answer 2

there have been 5 seashores - Omaha and Utah were American seashores and of those those who had to land on Omaha took vast losses, so severe that the operation became on the verge of being stated as off. In saving inner most Ryan the nature performed through Tom Hanks lands in this coastline. Gold, Sword and Juno to the east were British/Canadian seashores and the casualties were extremely gentle, as became Utah. there have been extra asualties led to in a pre-invasion workout that weny incorrect even as some German MTBs were one way or the different allowed to get in too close and fireplace off some torpedoes formerly escaping. That disaster at Slapton Sands in Devon (in SW England) became hushed up for decades afterwards and fortunately the Germans did not upload 2 and a couple of mutually and seem for similar seashores in Northern France that the Allies may be searching to land on.

Answer 3

My grandmother just died less than a month ago. My parents divorced when I was 4 months old, and my mom had go back to work. My grandma took care of me every day until I was about 11 years old and we were very close. It was very hard for me when she died. She had been in very ill health for a long time. She couldn't get out of bed. She could barely eat or talk. So, although it was very sad to lose her, I was relieved for her that she no longer had to suffer. I know that now she is in a better place with my grandfather, and that is what has helped me through it.

Answer 4

Bunnie, I have suffered a few of those devastating losses and still think about them after many years. I lost my mom 18 years ago due to cancer and I still think about it. I am not crying any longer, because I know she is in a better place and she doesn't have to suffer anymore. It took me about seven years to deal with the loss of my mom and got a handle on it. Now I think about all the good memories and it still makes me sad. It makes me even sad talking about it and I miss her terribly, but I know, she is around and watching over me.

Answer 5

Honestly... there is no known remedy or solution to cope with extreme grief.
Different individuals have different ways of dealing with it, I guess.
Personally, I would say to take each day at a time; having lost my dad to cancer not too long ago...
There're moments when I feel the pang of sadness greater when I look at other father-daughters; thinking how lucky they are & what it was like for me & my dad back then.

Answer 6

I lost a brother after a 6 month illness. After almost 4 years I can still find myself in a hopelessly sad place. I think this awful sense of lose will be a part of me until I die.

Answer 7

You must mourn properly--allow yourself to cry, be sad, and do not be guilty or ashamed. Time is an incredible healer. When I lost my father, my world crashed in on me. Years later, when I lost my best friend, my older sister, Ellen, I couldn't believe it could happen again. Even pets can devastate us--Barney was the sweetest cat in the world--if he were human, he'd have been Gandhi, so gentle he was. Just give it time and give it proper tears. Tears water the flowers of our memories of them.

Answer 8

Sometimes, when I have trouble letting go of something or someone and moving on; I will write their name or whatever it is on a small piece of paper and tie it to the string of a small helium balloon( party balloon) and let go of the balloon outside. Watch the balloon slowly drift away out of site along with the someone or something.

Sounds corny but it really does work. I saw it on TV once, don't remember the name of the show. I wish you well. =)

Answer 9

I am so sorry about your loss.....

I lost my only son in a horrible accident, two years ago.....The only thing I can tell you is that my faith in God really helped me get through it....Knowing I will see my son again someday. Everyday you think about that loved one and I always think of the good times and how special a person he was.....I also suggest you talk about your loved one with someone you trust and will listen you too, seek family and friends to talk to about it, don't bottle it up....Its good to verbalize your feelings and get them out, it helps with the grieving process.....Reading the bible gives me a lot of hope as well.....It gets easier with time....Just remember, everything happens for a reason....One day you will see that loved one....God bless

Answer 10

Yes, I have. My wife died years ago, and it has only taken time to make it easier to cope with. The loss will never be overcome, just more manageable as time passes. And counselors were worthless, so don't waste your money.