Am I wrong to go out with friends once during the week?

Question

I'm 26, my wife is 25, we'll be married for 2 years in Oct. We share the same group of friends (all couples) except for some of my old high school friends I still hang out w/ (She hangs out with them occasionally also). ANYWAYS I get off work at 10:30pm and every thursday they go out until about 1 or 2. I tell her I'm going to meet them out at the local BAR AND GRILL (NOT A CLUB) for some beers, and EVERY TIME she gets a big attitude. Her defense is "Is it wrong for me to want my husband to be home with me".....Am I in the wrong? It drives me crazy every time. I have given her no reason to have an attitude. (I also invite her everytime, but she has to wake up early)

Answer 1

If your friends are guys and you've been hanging out since high school then she shouldn't have a problem, but if some are girls then she's probably right, you should be home with her. Just remember she is your wife.

Answer 2

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Answer 3

No, I don't think you are wrong. Have you ever given her a reason to worry about you being out with your friends and having beers? (are you a flirt, etc.?) Having been in your wife's shoes before, here is what my experience was. I needed my husband to show me I was special and that he loved only me. Just a little something extra special, maybe just for the two of us. Why don't you try just taking her out to dinner just the two of you, or plan a romantic weekend for you all. For some of us, all you have to do is help out around the house. it is a really nice surprise for me if I come home and my husband has done all the laundry, for example. (It may sound mundane, but I am much more able to relax and have fun then) If you do these things more often, maybe she will start feeling more secure and feeling like you are putting your time with her first, and then maybe she won't mind so much you hanging out with your friends. My guess is she is feeling second place in general. Good luck.

Answer 4

It is wrong. You should be with your wife. You need to respect your wife when she has to wake up early. A bar and grill is the same thing as a club. Go drink beer at home. Only do things with your friends when your wife is going to come along. Asking her to come is not good enough. If she says no, stay home. If you want to stay married, stay at home.

Answer 5

ask her if you can go out with your friends before just saying i am going that way if there is any plans that she may of had she can tell you then also try comming in a little earlier that 1 or 2 that way you dont wake her when you come in she may also not be able to really sleep unless you are there i know i was like that when i first got married but now it has gotten a little better so just question her about it if is ok to go out with the guys till about 11:00 or so you can have just as much fun till then and you wont be disturbing her sleep good luck and talk to her about it if she says well i would just like you stay home tonight respect her wishes but then next week use it to your advantage by saying i stayed with you last week can i go this week and i will stay with you next week compromise good luck

Answer 6

No. Why would you even ask that question? Sounds like she is going through some jealousy issues and maybe she is a bit controlling. Don't give in, and even suggest that she go out with the girls once in a while during the week. Make her feel embarressed but don't give in, you need to have guy time. I understand this because I need girl time.

Answer 7

In my humble opinion your wife is being too sensitive about this. One night a week out with male friends is not too much to ask. My sister's husband has always had Wednesday night out with the boys. He is home by 12:00 each Wednesday night, and he gets up and goes to work (a little slowly) each Thursday morning. My sister can make plans with her friends for Wednesday nights and not worry about him getting upset about her going out. They both enjoy this time.

Answer 8

if u r not cheating on your wife i dont see no big deal with friends going out 4 a beer if her friends asked her 2 go out for a beer still no big deal i think men and women need some time apart

Answer 9

nope not wrong at all.... sounds like she has a few issues... it's not your fault she has to get up early .. and when you married her you didnt say ill will be home with you every night (i hope) .... you need time away from each other sometimes ..if you were together constantly you guys would go crazy .... tell her to relax and enjoy the peace and quiet while you are gone ..and you will be home soon

Answer 10

Kick it down to 2 times a month and work back up to the weekly thing.

I noticed early on in my marriage that my wife encouraged me to go out with friends and such....after I totally stayed home with her for weeks and weeks. Let her give you the nudge.