My ex husband is encouraging our 3 1/2 yr old daughter to call his newest girlfriend "mama" and this is making me furious. what can i do? He takes her to her house every time he has our daughter. He lost another job and when i asked him if he had gotten one, he just smiles (no). But he can afford his booze (alcoholic)..one huge reason i divorced him.. Lawyer says i have to catch him doing something "really bad". He doesn't answer any calls. he really doesn't care about our daughter, he is just using her against me as much as he can get away with. and no, for the record, i have no boyfriend since before i married the guy almost 6 yrs ago (divorced in feb 2006), because he makes me so furious that i can't stand the thought of another relationship ever! i am 45 he is 48, of course his gf is younger, i expected that, i just hate for him to use our daughter like that. my family has to stop me from going over to his place and confront him. And he loves the fact that i am struggling $ wise.
2006-08-31 14:31:00 · 5 answers · asked by nowisthetime 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
he called me at work in a lonely tone--i know that tone-but i ignored it, and said we will only talk about our child and her needs. He was calling to tell me what time he would pick her up thurs (it's the same time evey thurs) but was asking if i was off the next day and what i was planning for the day (we used to always tell each other our scheds) I said I had an appt and other things to do but would be home in time for him to pick her up. I kept the conversation polite as i could and civil, his tone of voice was lonely, i think not all is paradise in new lover land, but i don't care, his choice. He asked what appt and i said, nothing to do w/you, & i didn't have to tell him anything about my life, so he shut up..After the call, I ran to the staff bathroom at work and cried so hard and tried to throw up but i don't eat because of all this so nothing came up. I am getting help for these feelings as they are making me too sick-but i make sure my child only sees me happy when he comes!
2006-09-07 03:16:11 · update #1
I know you are hurt but you are not sure it's the truth about the momma thing. You are not there. anyway your daughter will know who her mama is. You do however need to deal with the fact he may remarry and then your daughter will have another sort of mom in her life. You know it's a reason why he is your ex you need to remember this. Meaning you couldn't get along and you hated his ways you couldn't reach a compromise. It's time for the healing to begin don't let those things you hated about him while you were married control you. If you don't gain your freedom from your feelings of disappointment from him, you will never be free to move on. You'll just end up bitter and alone. Right now you think that's where you want to be. But don't let him win. Look at him with another woman already. don't let him keep causing you pain. Don't let your daughter know you as the mad sad mommy. Just go and get child support and let the law force him to work and pay or jail time. Go by the visitation rules don't talk to him. meet him at the door kiss your daugher give her a big hug close the door. Remeber you are divorced you don't have to listen to him anymore.
2006-09-06 20:30:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you have alot of anger towards him that you need to work through. Its hurting you, dont let it, get help dealing with it so you can get over it and not let it affect you like it does. I think its wrong that he has your daughter call the new gf "mama". But, Im not sure what you can do about that. Good luck dealing with this guy you are much better off without!!!!!!!!
2006-08-31 21:44:09 · answer #2 · answered by Michelle : 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry about your situation, but there is little you can do. It sounds like he is just trying to play with your head, so the less you show him that it is working or getting to you...the better off you will be.
2006-08-31 21:46:15 · answer #3 · answered by tjjone 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GURLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL YOU BETTER TELL THAT DUMBASS HE BETTER NOT BE HAVING HIM CALL THAT OTHER ***** MAMA. THAT IS ABSOULTLY NOT OK. YOU NEED TO GET AND KEEP CUSTODY OF YOUR LIL GURL IF HE ACTS LIKE HE DONT CARE ABOUT HER.
2006-08-31 21:43:04 · answer #4 · answered by ~sarah~ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try the links in http://www.freewebs.com/legaladvice/
2006-09-03 02:19:26 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋