I have been married for 10 years but I often fantasize about meeting someone else. I don't plan to ever cheat on my husband but I think about other men (not real men, just made-up men). I guess I'm feeling a little lonely, too, in my marriage. We're hardly ever intimate anymore (busy schedules; kids). Not sure what to do.
2006-08-31 11:09:15 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think you are perfectly normal. Daydreaming and fantasizing about things is part of life. If you have no intention of acting on your fantasies, then there is no problem. I do think you should talk to your husband and tell him you miss him and y'all's quiet time together. Tell him that you want more of him in a one on one situation. I am sure he is probably feeling the same way you are, be the first to take the step and he will much appreciate you for it........Good luck honey
2006-08-31 11:16:41 · answer #1 · answered by dixiegirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can say from my own experiences that when that happens to me I know something is missing in my current relationship. If you feel up to it, I would sit down and think about what it is in the fantasies you like the best, and maybe those are things that you feel lacking in your current relationship.
The choice is ultimately yours, if you want to try and recreate that in your marriage or move on to someone else. For me, it generally ends up with me moving on, but that doesn't mean a couple can't work it out and break out of a rut together, it just takes work.
2006-08-31 11:13:31 · answer #2 · answered by rohwaldy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I done that and it is normal. You've been glued to one person for a decade now, and you're starting to dream up, what if? There has to be something you can do to put the spart back in. A day where both of you have no work, or have the evening off, that would help. Let him play into your fantasy.
2006-08-31 11:15:16 · answer #3 · answered by Golden Scepter 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was lonely in my marriage for 40 years before I acted on my daydreams of an affair.
When I finally did act, I met and hed sexual realtionships wit 5 women. It was a great experience. I learned a lot about sex that I never knew before and I have memories that make me feel warm all over.
But, be careful. This can lead to problems.
2006-08-31 11:13:42 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
my sister~ I dont know if you are a christian but the Bible says that sin begins as a seed planted by the devil in our minds. The enemy would have to think that because they arent "real men" that its not cheating but hear me when I say, these "harmless" thoughts that you have will begin to manifest into something more real after awhile if you do not cast them down. I encourage you to seek God's Word together. He can show you both how to rediscover love together beyond anything you have experienced.
God bless you and keep you...
2006-08-31 11:21:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to your man tell him how you feel and see if it may be a missing thing about your sex life, if you want it to stop you've got to do it, i definitely can't fix it for you. all i can do is give you advice. make a day where it is only you and him, i'm not saying to neglect your kids. say every sunday, let that be grandma day. let the kids visit a family member, it doesn't have to be the whole day. let it be a few hours. that will help you. if that isn't enough make a day every month that you get away for the weekend! that's the key!
2006-08-31 11:18:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sex drive is natural. Monogamy is supernatural. Sounds like you have some social needs as well as physical ones that are concerning you.
Choices are difficult in these areas. What are you really willing to risk? How can you reduce the risk and still scratch your itch?
:)
:)
Not just choices, then, but managing the outcome...
Have fun.
2006-09-01 09:55:50 · answer #7 · answered by Just David 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No such thing as normalcy , but i do tell you that is natural. Ten yrs is a long time to be stuck to one person. Is logical that you fanticize about "fake" men. You not just lonely , but BORED. Most will tell you to restart the fire, but honestly how many blows does it take to bring back the BARBQ !!! =)
One clue of insight, if he hasnt showed any interest in you is because he is already ahead of you in them fantasies. *capisce ;)
2006-08-31 11:35:41 · answer #8 · answered by lopez76g 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would have to think this is perfectly normal. It might be fantasy now, but will it lead to curiosity to seek out and fulfill that fantasy? I think it might. I think its the excitement of the sexual adventure and not holding back in your fantasies. I believe its common in many (men and woman) but only a few actually admit to it.
2006-08-31 13:22:42 · answer #9 · answered by legguy2003 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why do you have to make up men... There are plenty of real men to fantacise about.
OK, to be serious - get a hobby; don't be stuck in a desperate rut. Sex is not the only way to have fun in life (I mean there are also vidoegames!)
2006-08-31 11:58:01 · answer #10 · answered by codex 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋