shese been lettin a guy (not her boyfriend) spend the night and they **** when i'm sleep. what should i do about this situation. i want to do something but i'm kinda nervous because her real boyfriend might find out.
2006-08-31 08:50:50 · 17 answers · asked by megan c 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Do something. First of all, confront her and tell her you really do not feel comfortable with her doing this when you are present (and all the more so if they are waking you up). If that doesn't work, talk to your RA or to the administration of your dorm. If she's worried about her boyfriend finding out, she should be thinking about that instead of ****ing someone else.
Indeed, she's just setting herself and her boyfriend up for a very bad situation. Someone is going to be heartbroken, although from what you say it may not be her - which would be even worse, because it would mean that she has destroyed her ability to love and give herself to another person, and turned herself into a sex object.
And she is a creature made in God's image - so she is worth more than that. She needs to learn self-respect. So while I think you are right not to approve of her behavior, it would be proper to keep in mind that she does have that human dignity, and remember to treat her with respect.
Who knows - maybe you will be the first person who treats her this way? It would be great for you to model this respect for her so she can learn to have it for herself. It can be so much better for her: she could, if she respected herself and waited for the right person, have a situation where the two of them put each other first, take full responsibility and really give all of themselves to each other forever. Why should she settle for bits and pieces?
In other words, try to couch it in terms of that it's really best for all concerned, *including her*, if she makes some lifestyle changes :>
2006-08-31 09:05:51 · answer #1 · answered by songkaila 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The cheating thing. Unless her real BF is a very good friend of yours (then you should sit down and talk with him) - it's not really your business. That is her morality thing and her life, not yours.
As to letting her act like a rabbit with her non-BF while you are trying to sleep. Well, that is very selfish behavior and disrespectful to you. She is immature. (At least she does not discriminate as to who she disrespects....)
As another person said, talk with an RA. If your dorm has rules about that behavior (no guys staying overnight in girls' rooms), then she broke the rules and should be dealt with. If there are no rules, then you should apply for a change in scenery, as well as roomates.
Sorry to hear that you got dealt a bad hand. Cheer up, though, it's not the end of the world. You are just finding out about selfish people. The world is full of them.
2006-08-31 09:25:19 · answer #2 · answered by Tom-SJ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your roommate is a selfish inconsiderate jerk. Plus, a cheater.
Ask the school or who is in charge of the dorm for a new room assignment. You explain or not why.
Your roommate probably enjoys the fact you are there, she may get off on that.
If really mean video tape them.
You may have to put up with for this semster, but get your change for new room and roommate in now.
2006-08-31 08:56:37 · answer #3 · answered by Pantherempress 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow...kinda sounds like what happend with one of my friends and her roommate last year.....but it was with her roommate and her roommate's actual boyfriend.
they would have sex on her futon(the roommates not my friends) and then she would blaim my friend about getting stuff on it...WTF...
then they would always be there when she was and gone when she was gone. then the roomie would complain about her being there.....
my friend wasn't allowed to have any friends over..but yet the roomie always did. the roomie at my friends food,drank her drinks...then if my friend would eat alittle of the roomie's cereal she'd get pissed....
during christmas break the roomie moved into a different room and my friend was by herself.
maybe there is a way to get a new roomie..or switch...thats what my brother did at his college a few years back...
and to her real boyfriend....it shouldn't bother you...its the roomie's problem not urs..
good luck
2006-08-31 09:06:40 · answer #4 · answered by ♥Brown Eyed Girl ♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have a video camera, video it and show it to her real b/f and see what he says.. tell him its been goin on for a while and not worry about it anymore.. If she gets pissed, tell the administration that she/you has to have another room ASAP...
OR theres always option #2:
Just take her real b/f and have sex w/ him while they're sleepin and MAKE MORE NOISE THAN THEY DO then see how she likes it...
2006-08-31 08:54:37 · answer #5 · answered by bleakpurity999 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should talk to your resident advisor. There is probably a procedure for changing roommates or getting a new room.
2006-08-31 08:54:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask the resident advisor if you can change rooms. If she asks why, tell her the situation makes you uncomfortable and invades your privacy.
2006-08-31 08:54:20 · answer #7 · answered by Nefertiti 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find a way to casually bring it up when her boyfriend is over, and let them work it out. ;-)
2006-08-31 08:55:57 · answer #8 · answered by Sean J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your roommate that it bothers you and tell her you'll tell her bf if she don't stop. Otherwise, get use to it you're in college.
2006-08-31 08:55:03 · answer #9 · answered by angeleyez 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask to change your roommate with the school. say that you just don't get along. they shoudl be able to place you somewhere else.
2006-08-31 08:56:14 · answer #10 · answered by crystalfaria11306 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋