I love her and she loves me. We get along great and I get along with my boyfriend or my fiance...whatever we choose to call ourselves..lol...his sister.
When my boyfriend and I argue, his mother will call me and make sure I'm okay. I just absolutely love her!!!
But...she's extremely dependant on him. She has a job, but she doesn't make very much money and in order to stay in a nice neighborhood....she needs his income. He however is trying to move to another state to be with me..the state that I live in. He cant move because his finances aren't together because he constantly is giving his mother money.
The thing is, I love his mom, I want to give her money, so that she won't have to struggle. I don't want her to struggle either. But now my boyfriends move to be with me will be delayed 7 months now instead of 2 months to be with me. We've been apart nearly 1 year and a half. I'm tired of the wait. He's well worth it and I'm going to wait, but I can't help but feel frustrated.
2006-08-31 08:12:21 · 5 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
He's 27 years old and he has 2 other siblings, who don't take care of his mother and who WON'T take care of her. Its horrible, he's supposed to take care of her, I love her...and I want to help...but its soooo frustrating that now I'm worried we wont ever be together. Everytime he makes a move...something else with his mother happens to delay it.
I feel mean and selfish...but I don't want her to struggle..I truly don't, but I dont want to be without him either.
Ugh....am I simply being mean and selfish?
2006-08-31 08:13:04 · update #1
Yes she knows he is moving. She's known for almost a year, since the beginning of this year that he's wanting to move to be with me. She doesnt want to leave the North and he is moving down South to be with me. She knows he wants to move...everyone knows he wants to move. I've waited a year and a half...I've been patient...and I will continue to be...but now I'm feeling slighted. I dont want her to struggle, but what about our relationship? I'm still in college, so I cant just move and I have a really good job.
2006-08-31 08:26:03 · update #2
You're the epitomy of 'mean and selfish'.
2006-08-31 08:17:21 · answer #1 · answered by S K 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If this is a money issuebetween his mom and him, there is still no excuse due to the fact that there is mail service, western union, or even a joint bank account. There is a way that you 2 can still get her money so that should not stop him from moving to where you are. No, you are not being selfish. And you have every right to be frustrated. Maybe you 2 should really sit down and weigh out EVERY option, and see what would be the best thing to do. Where there is a will, there is a way. Hang in there and Good Luck!
2006-08-31 15:55:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are feeling the natural frustration anyone would feel in this situation. Can't she move with you guys? I am not advising that but that is a solution. Sit and talk to you bf about this see what he says, it really isnt your bfs fault so you could just be patient somemore and wait the 7 months. Does she know you guys are moving? Did you ever talk to her about this situation u might need to have a long talk with her, can she get a smaller house in the neighbourhood or an apartment that she can afford or her salary. You need to be with your husband to be all she needs is some of his money so you will find a way to work it out.
2006-08-31 15:22:31 · answer #3 · answered by Joyann R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I didn't even read the details. If a girl asks if she's selfish, the answer is yes. It's not your fault, it's in your DNA.
2006-08-31 15:34:50 · answer #4 · answered by jswllms 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think your being selfish at all I would have left him and moved on by now because I am selfish.
2006-08-31 15:28:53 · answer #5 · answered by Rachel Bitchface 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋